Surrogacy

[Freddie]

Hi there,

After m/c's and failed IVFs, DH and I were thinking of going the surrogate route. Having done my research I have found that it can take anything up to 2 years to find a suitable surrogate. It is illegal to advertise in this country so your only real option is to go with one of the 2 surrogcy "agencies" in the UK and pay them additional fees (- as if the whole cost isn't daunting enough!). Although they are very helpful and do provide additional support if you so require, you pay for it either way, there is no choice, and there is still no guarantee of them finding you a surrogate.
With no advertising, surrogacy is fairly unknown by the general public which results in there being a real shortage of surrogates, while in the US it is well known and there is really no shortage - it certainly does not take 2 years to find one!

Most other countries where surrogacy is legal (as it is in the UK), advertising for a surrogate or Intended Parents is also legal. And if it's legal to advertise for an egg/sperm donor over here, why on earth is it not legal to advertise for a surrogate?!

Any comments more than welcome and thanx for voting!

[Fee]

what is an IP?

[summer p]

i was gonna ask the same thing! what is a ip? i presum from the post its a intended parent?if so what does this mean? then i can vote!

[mancgal_644]

i have voted that it should be legal for both as long as there happy to do so then where is the problem it could make things alot faster for ppl 

[Freddie]

Sorry guys,

Yes IP = Intended parent, i.e. the couple who can't have a baby by themselves and need a surrogate.

Thanx for voting!
F x

[~Twinkle~]

Hello Freddie,

I have voted to both, good on you doing something about it.

Good luck
Take care
Spiritx

[alex28]

I too have voted.  Currently doing IUI using donor sperm.

[Tony Reid]

Hi there,

After m/c's and failed IVFs, DH and I were thinking of going the surrogate route. Having done my research I have found that it can take anything up to 2 years to find a suitable surrogate. It is illegal to advertise in this country so your only real option is to go with one of the 2 surrogcy "agencies" in the UK and pay them additional fees (- as if the whole cost isn't daunting enough!). Although they are very helpful and do provide additional support if you so require, you pay for it either way, there is no choice, and there is still no guarantee of them finding you a surrogate.
With no advertising, surrogacy is fairly unknown by the general public which results in there being a real shortage of surrogates, while in the US it is well known and there is really no shortage - it certainly does not take 2 years to find one!

Most other countries where surrogacy is legal (as it is in the UK), advertising for a surrogate or Intended Parents is also legal. And if it's legal to advertise for an egg/sperm donor over here, why on earth is it not legal to advertise for a surrogate?!

Any comments more than welcome and thanx for voting!

Draft me a wording on this and I'll splash it on the home page

Tony,
x

tony@fertilityfriends.co.uk

[cherryb]

hi there

I think that the law is absolutely stupid and good on you for taking this to your MP... would be willing to lend support in anyway that I can.

Cherryb

[Sushi]

Hi Freddie,

I've voted too, in favour of both being able to advertise. But obviously there would have to be some safeguards as the IP's are in a vulnerable position. I'm sure even with advertising the involvement of an agency as an independant 3rd party would be useful.

I'm still confident that I will be able to produce my own baby  but if I had to look at other options sometime in the future I would rather go for surrogacy rather than adoption.

Sushi xxx

[rosy]

Hi Freddie, I've only looked into surrogacy briefly as it seems to be yet another expensive, time consuming and not even guaranteed option - I just haven't got the energy to take it on board.

So I was even more impressed by your posting - good luck with the lobbying and please let me know if you need support.

Rosy

[Freddie]

Just wanted to say thanks Rosie I'll keep you in mind, and a big thanks also to everyone that's voted.

I did notice tho that we've had close to 300 hits, but only 83 votes. I know for a FF pol that's pretty good, but in order for the powers that be to take us seriously, WE NEED MORE! 
So please tell everyone you know to vote   - even if you're not directly involved with surrogacy, you have an opinion!

Thanx stax
F x

[Dydie]

I have voted Yes for both, but would still like to know that it would be regulated in some fashion and that each person involved would still be offered counselling, I just worry about the many young women in places like the USA who basically sell themselves because they need the money, and of course the IP's who end up without a child because the BM refuses to give it up,
Dydie

[mrs cloudy]

Hi Freddy

I voted yes yes.  I think it is a complete double standard to allow surrogacy but not advertising?  I think that the message that gives, is that there is something seedy about the whole thing.  I think it is something to do with the mainly men who make the laws being offended by women choosing what to do with their bodies.  I do however agree that there needs to be regulation to avoid the horrible situations that you sometimes hear about from the USA. 

ps i hope your h is now a d not still a w and that you made upwith lots of 

Good lusk

[EJJB]

Hi,
 I have voted yes to both being able to advertise.
We are currently looking for a straight surrogate, and have been for nearly two years.
We originally joined both SUK and COTS, but were forced to leave COTS, after we had a disagreement with them.
SUk have been great and really supportive, but they do not guarrantee to find you a surrogate.
If there were more surrogates, we would stand a better chance, but there is no way I would want it to move towards the American way, where surrogates can and do charge a fortune, and also are treated like commodities.
SUK believes in a friendship first way of working, which means that good relationships help to ensure no one gets hurt.
EJJB
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