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here's a phrase I hate..

18K views 162 replies 61 participants last post by  Butterfly1984 
#1 ·
"If it's meant to be". People really say this, that babies only happen when "it's meant to be". It drives me nuts.  There's a story here that a woman murdered seven babies shortly after giving birth and buried them in her garden.  So those babies were meant to be, but not mine that is desperately wanted?  Or babies born to drug addicts are meant to be?

I'm just venting.  I do have a daughter, for which I am eternally grateful.  But we have been trying to have a second one for over a year.
 
#27 ·
That is just mean, they wouldnt say to a cancer sufferer, hey I'm in tip top condition health wise, would they?

Having said that, when I had my cancer scare I had one of my old bosses say well my daughter thought she had (a different type of cancer) but it turned out she was fine and it was all in her head! And that was the conversation over! Nice huh!

I didn't bother to tell him about the fertility treatment after that!

I pretty much work for myself now so no more insensitive twits to deal with, if people are insensitive I can just walk away!

Pudding
X
 
#28 ·
I think everyone on this feed should meet up and have a big **** off session, although not sure it would leave us feeling very positive at the end... this has me in stitches. We have to laugh right?!  ^idiot^
 
#29 ·
'You never know, it might just happen naturally, I knew a friend or a friend that didn't think she could have kids then it just happened'
Well yes I am very happy for that person but no I can't have children naturally and no that will not happen to me!!!!!!!!

Becca
 
#30 ·
Love london You are totally right it's laugh or cry! And I have had enough crying recently!

Pudding
X
 
#31 ·
Or my other personal favourite "So many people have IVF for their first one and then you find the second one happens naturally".  Well someone should've told me that earlier as I've been trying for the second one for 2 years and I've also had another 4 failed txs, silly me it's going to happen naturally of course!
 
#32 ·
Three of my friends were pregnant at the same time and when the third one announced her pregnancy she said  'There must be something in the air with us all becoming pregnant, you just need to breathe more deeply'. So all along while I was doing ivf I should just have changed my breathing! ^idiot^
 
#33 ·
Love London said:
I've got another one ....
My old boss used to near enough everyday say " My daughter is sooo fertile" she'd show me her screensaver, tons of pictures of her grandkids. She knew I was having treatment! ;D
What a kn0b!
 
#34 ·
Hee, hee, this thread has really made me giggle! A woman at work said to me that she thinks "babies souls are out there and they are waiting to find the right mum for them, the baby picks you and one day your baby will find you" initially you might think it's sweet, if not slightly bonkers, but I was left thinking "great, after three years TTC no baby has thought I'm good enough for them"  :( How depressing!!
 
#35 ·
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
I honestly cant seem to get myself together with laughter.

Mine is "dont worry, relax and try harder, it will happen when u least expect it"
You must be out of your mind  :mad: :mad:
How hard can I try after over 4yrs,  :-\

how relaxed can I be when everyone seems to be pregnant around me?  :-[ :-[
And when do you think I should stop expecting when all I do is expect to miss my period for pregnancy huh  :mad: :mad:

This is so unfair :'( :'( :'(
 
#36 ·
I love this thread!!!!

How about this one...

"Enjoy your time now because it will all change when you have children"

well let's hop so as I don't really want to be doing injections everyday day and stick dildocams up me for life!
 
#38 ·
Blockipe

I sincerely hope you told the stranger to mind their one god damn business! Or words to that effect!

Pudding
X
 
#39 ·
This thread made me smile I've heard so many of these annoying comments from people! Recently my boss did the best one after my BFn " never mind I never had any trouble Getting pregnant but sometimes I just think of all the money you will save and holidays you can go on , your lucky really! " yea because I have loads of money left after paying for years of trying to get pregnant! And no baby that makes me lucky?!
 
#40 ·
I've had a good giggle reading these,
Here's one from my MIL after phoning her to tell her of our bfn 14dp5dt, and dr telling me to stop meds, " wait another couple of days and test again keep thinking positive. It maybe to early to tell"  ^bigbad^ ^bigbad^

Some people really have no idea! ^bigbad^

Keep smiling ladies,
Donna xx
 
#41 ·
Oh Gosh this thread has really made me and my DH laugh (Have been reading them all out to him).

I have heard all of these, my favourite being "Just sit in the magic chair.. so and so sat there and got pregnant"... Do these people really not know the science behind conception? haha

As I work in a primary school I have also been told to "Go and work in that classroom because the last TA that worked in there got pregnant".

God help us!! ^idiot^ ;D
 
#42 ·
Madrid333 said:
I think I've got the answer...

Take the magic chair on holiday, when you're thoroughly relaxed sit on it when you least expect it, like halfway up Mount Everest. If it's meant to be...you'll get twins.

My friend did it after 36 yrs of trying so..chin up.

Thank you, that'll be 6 grand x
P.s Madrid333 This is hilarious... I may try this!! haha ;D
 
#43 ·
My latest one -' Well, you have one, your body obviously knows what to do'
That was 10 yrs ago, my body has clearly forgotten, anyone know how to remind it?  ???
 
#44 ·
I have just thought of another one - "Change your lifestyle and make sure you stop going out drinking"...

Uhmmm, I have been trying to conceive for 6 years now, I think I would have stopped going out drinking and started being healthy a long time ago now!

I hate when people assume because i'm 27 I must still go out drinking, and eat nothing but mcdonalds, and that is the reason why I haven't conceived!  ^idiot^
 
#45 ·
When I first went to see our gp - all she would say is don't worry too much, just remember it only takes 1 sperm  ^bigbad^ ^bigbad^ ????
 
#46 ·
Helps to laugh and vent ladies, excellent thread! Have heard so many of these over the years, lots from my DH!!  :-\ My latest one is being told by my boss that she knows 'exactly' how I feel as my predicament is almost identical to hers: she had to work from home for two days to care for her suicidal, alcoholic bf and our HR dept would only let her take one day as compassionate leave. Ummm sorry to say that, whilst it's undeniably sad that her (now ex) bf is in such a bad way, it in no way compares to my predicament which I have absolutely NO control of whatsoever! Oh, and I couldn't work from home either, I had to carry on with my proverbial 'chin up'! ;) 

Another recent favourite from my oh so sensitive Consultant is to blame my IF on me being 'old' and 'fat' and recommending that I just don't eat so I could lose weight, but wouldn't have to forego alcohol as I needed to 'have a life' afterall! Was too shocked with that one to point out that 13 years ago I wasn't so old, or fat, yet still kinda had the same problems!! Grrrrr!!
 
#47 ·
Oh my god, that is horrendous! There are some real idiots out there!  ^hugme^
 
#48 ·
Brilliant - most of the advice I got was just get drunk because of the number of people that fall pregnant from drunken one night stands.
 
#49 ·
Wisp said:
Hee, hee, this thread has really made me giggle! A woman at work said to me that she thinks "babies souls are out there and they are waiting to find the right mum for them, the baby picks you and one day your baby will find you" initially you might think it's sweet, if not slightly bonkers, but I was left thinking "great, after three years TTC no baby has thought I'm good enough for them" :( How depressing!!
Lol that is a sweet thought actually,

Aww bless you, you are good enough!. x
 
#50 ·
I'm loving reading through these little gems... Just wanted to share my latest horror story with you all.


Recently I was visiting my friend and her 6 week old baby (her second, both conceived naturally virtually without trying). She knows we have had to use donor sperm as our only option to conceive. She also knows in the past few months I have endured a failed IVF cycle, closely followed by a miscarriage, and I'm sitting there finally, FINALLY pregnant with my much wanted, very longed-for, hard won baby. What does she choose to talk about? Her plans to get the contraceptive implant, because in her words, "DH only has to look at me to get me pregnant" and she DEFINITELY doesn't want any more  ^bigbad^


Feeling rather at a loss for what to say, I mumbled something about the one silver lining to IF being that I will never have to worry about contraception ever again, and she replies, "But it could still happen, couldn't it?" Um, no, you stupid ignorant b@#%h, it could not! No sperm = no babies! Basic biology lesson! And why would we be using donor sperm if "it could still happen"? Why would I have enjoyed months of expensive, invasive, unpleasant fertility treatment? I'm not ashamed to say I have not spoken to this friend since.
 
#51 ·
I like this thread too..  :)

Plenty of times I've had the whole

'it will happen when you least expect it'

I have no fcuking Fallopian tubes so no it 'won't happen when I least expect it' & I'm pretty sure if it did all your ivf cycles would be on me girls as the sun would be paying me an absoloute fortune for my story lmao

seriously some people are so dumb it's unreal. x

We want another baby so will try ivf again next year but someone recently said to me, it's just taken you 10 years for your son why go through it all again, basically be satisfied for what I have... why should I stop at 1, no body else has too. X
 
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