A New Chat Thread for Twin Mummies bringing up lone twins

[dreamer100]

Thanks

Your post make so much sense, I know I am not alone and others feel my pain too. Its so sad sometimes to think I can switch off an think it never happened and only think of my daughter as a singleton, in somewhat moment of madness its the only way to move forward.

I have stayed away from posting, I have made lots of friends on her but then dont go on for months as its seems too painful.

Why was life so unfair???

I would love another baby but cant even do that .......

[minimay]

Hi
Not sure if anyone still posts here. Would like to chat to other lone twin mums if there are any out there?
Mx

[dreamer100]

 
Hi M
 
I am still here from time to time if you want to chat. I had twin girls at 23 4 but sadly only one home but a very healthy two year old. My life goes on but good days and bad days but the bad days are getting less and I think the only way forward is keeping going and don't blame yourself. I have spent hrs, days thinking what did I do wrong but I can come to the conclusion as my consultant said  I was extremely unlucky so don't punish myself.
 
I went to counselling but that didn't help, the only people who have helped me are my family and friends in the way that they will never forget Millie, by putting flowers on her little grave and always remembering.
 
I find myself telling everyone she was (is)  a twin and proud of my girls and only now i can say it without crying.
 
Sorry just realised I have gone on .... and on 
 
 
 
Michelle
 

[Hugs]

Hello,
 
I'm another mummy to my surviving twin. Here to chat too.
 
xx

[kitty123]

Hello,
I belong here too. Triplet mummy who lost one baby. The pain doesn't go away, it changes. I still have days full of tears and am not yet off the medication for depression but am getting there. I'm here to chat too.
Lisa xxxxx

[minimay]

thanks for your replies ladies  to you and your LOs

I am ok most days but then sometimes a little thing reminds me of how much we have lost and i am in pieces. I am trying so hard to focus on the positives - a year ago DH and I thought we might never be parents. Now we have James and had 7 precious weeks with Ryan. We are getting a big picture of him framed to put up in our house so we can see him every day. Also going to give our parents framed photos too.

We are really keen to try for another preg asap. I really want James to have a sibling close in age. I know it wont be the same as having a twin but if near in age I hope they can be closer. I have some frosties but am currently BF. Anyone have any thoughts as to when I might be allowed to use them?

Michelle -  to Millie. thats great news that you are having another cycle of ICSI. Will you be having eSET?

Hugs -  to Daniel. congrats on having Katie. Can I ask if you conceived naturally or had more treatment?

Lisa -  to Ted. How are K + L getting on? Are they identical?

Mx

[kitty123]

Hi Mini-May,


Getting a picture of Ryan framed for your house is a lovely thing to do and being able to share with your parents is wonderful. How is James doing?


We only have a few photos of Ted, but one is a really sweet one of his feet which we're going to get framed for our room when we move house.


Kitty and Laurie are doing really well now - they are full of life and laughter.  Ted was identical with Laurie which for me was really heart wrenching in the early days. I have never told anyone this, and maybe some of you will understand (I hope), but sometimes I used to hold Laurie and pretend he was Ted. Not imagining that Laurie had died and Ted had survived, just trying to imagine what it would be like to hold Ted.    Please someone tell me that I'm not loony!


Lisa x

[Sassilon]

Hi. I'm looking or a bit of advice and was wondering if you lovely ladies could help. I gave birth to triplets - ID boys and a girl in December. They were born at 24 +3 weeks and we lost one of the boys when he was 6 days old, the remaining boy and the girl are now home with us but I'm wondering how to include Sebastian, our baby who died,  in their lives without it casting a shadow for them. I think i'd like them to grow up knowing about him rather than having to break the news to them when they are older. What do you think?

[kitty123]

Hello Sassilon,


I'm really sorry to hear of your loss. Sebastian is a lovely name. I hope his brother and sister are doing well at home with you.


We also lost a triplet boy, Ted, who is Laurie's identical brother. My little boy and little girl are both just over 2 and a half. We've only got as far as saying goodnight to Ted each night. They are just starting to understand that they are brother and sister (and calling each other brother and sister) so over the next few months we might start introducing that Ted was/is their brother. We're just feeling our way really, but like you want to make sure he is part of their lives without casting a shadow. You summed it up really well and I am sure the right thing is to try to do things as naturally as possible. I'll let you know how we get on.


Again, so sorry that you lost your little boy. Please feel free to PM me if you'd like to.


Lisa xxxxx

[beckalouise]

Hi all

Just wanted to add my story as have been looking on the general loss treads but like others have said didn't feel that was the right place to post so glad I found here.

My beautiful boys were born 10wks ago at 38wks, heartbreakingly twin 1, Elliott was born sleeping and we were told he must have gone about a week earlier unknown to me.  However I am forever grateful that my miracle twin 2, Austin is a happy healthy baby who gives us such joy.

My emotions are so mixed but generally I do manage to enjoy every day but then feel guilty that Elliott isnt here to enjoy the things we do too.

It has helped me to read the other posts so thank you girls

Beckalouise x

P.s big big  to all so sorry for you losses x