* Author Topic: A New Chat Thread for Twin Mummies bringing up lone twins  (Read 51217 times)

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Offline AggieJ

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Quick  ^wave^ from me...

Kiwi - so pleased that you got more reassurance from the hospital and that you're out of the biggest danger time  ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^

Kez - Hope that Euan did well at his weigh-in. I'm a teacher like your daughter, bet she'll be relieved to have half-term  ^hugme^. Is her DH staying at home to care for Euan then? That's what we do 4 days a week... when we thought we'd have 2 children we couldn't afford anything else and now I couldn't cope with handing J over to other people to care for

Kitty -  ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ for you and your babies. Sorry to hear they're suffering a bit after their jab. You're not paranoid in the least, we all understand  ^hugme^

Denise -  ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ for you

Budgie - good luck with going to groups. It's hard...  :-\, but gets easier I think.  ^hugme^ ^hugme^
I did it really early on as didn't want to stay in with my demons, so got way too good at putting on an act (the mask did crack eventually in the HV office!!) I managed to find a few Mums I could trust, though they still don't know the really awful details of what happened to Eddie/us. It's sad that we don't feel like normal mummies atm but we will  :-*

Dreamer -  ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^

Not sure if anyone is familiar with this website: http://www.climb-support.org/ Have only just discovered it and am finding really useful.

Much love

Kate xxx





Offline kiwitk

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Hi Ladies,

Hope everyone is well :)  We're still doing ok, I had a little nausea last night and at one point uterus contracted and was like a beach ball just before bed for a minute or two, so went to bed and got out the doppler found a good strong heartbeat which was reassuring, nothing else since then.  He's not been moving as much as usual yesterday and today, about to go and get a glass of icy water to see if I can wake him up!  No other 'symptoms' or anything so am assuming everything is ok and he's just having a quiet period. 

Hope you are all doing well, the soft play places sound like fun - what are they?

Love to everyone

xx

Offline AggieJ

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Evening ladies
It's so quiet here... I've been away as Jacob has had horrible sick bug  :-\. Poor lad couldn't even hold down water for 1st 24 hours and slept for 2 days in our bed. Hurrah for NHS Direct, so good to be able to ring them at 3am to get reassurance  :)

Kiwi - thinking of you lots atm xx

Bugdie -  ^hugme^ ^hugme^ ^hugme^ for you and Nathan

hope everyone else ok

Kate xxx

Offline kiwitk

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Hi everyone,

we've been quiet on here recently :)  How is everyone doing?  Babies all fine and over their illnesses?

Bump and I are doing well, had a few days where he wasn't moving as much as usual which freaked me out a bit but he was flip-flopping about like mad again yesterday so I'm relaxed again today.

Dh is away for the week from today so it's me bump and the cat keeping each other company, it's also my last week off work so I'm thinking I might venture out at some point and treat myself to a facial.

Hope you are all doing well xx

Offline dreamer100

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  • My family is finally complete 3 girls and 1 angel

Hi All,

Sorry to join in feeling low too.....  Budgie - same here also I understand I cant help but feeling so angry and everyday ask why me ? ?  I promised myself I would go to counciling but everytime I go to ring I find I reason not too as what do I say ????  "I not coping" ??    I know I am taking my anger out on my family and friends and even had a row with hubby tonight to a point where he said he was packing his bags. ( i dont think he means its) but it me driving him away and we have been happy for 13 years. I have pushed alot of people away but I dont feel the happier person I once was and I know I should be gratefull for Sophie but Heartbroken for Millie????????????

Will I ever feel happy again ?

Kiwitk - A facial sound like a good idea

Hugs - How are u? How's Aimee doing? had Sophie weighed last week now only 11lb 12oz and should be 14lbish so have been a bit worried but she is on 3 meals a day and about 20oz so doing my best. We have a follow up on Thursday so see what they say.

Aggie - Has Jacob recovered?

Michelle

Offline kiwitk

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Oh guys your posts made me feel so sad  :'(  It's so hard isn't it, I was sitting at home yesterday wondering about what it's going to be like when and if this little guy makes it out and how I'm going to feel and what we should be telling him and when, I think in some ways I have it a bit easier than some of you as Eden having died whilst still inside me means that I haven't had to go through the heartbreak of seeing her born, holding her and getting to bond physically with her before losing her.  The pain is still there having seen her on so many scans and feeling her move inside me, and all our conversations and joy at expecting her arrival, but I dont think it's the same as having actualy met her.

I'm determined at this stage to feel joy in th existance of my little boy when he comes and hope that I can let go of his sister when the time comes, but who knows until that time comes.

I was wondering whether TAMBA could be of any help with other mummies in your areas who have been through the same thing?  Whilst these forums are a great outlet for our feelings both good and bad, it'll never compare with the close personal support a meet up with a friend in the same circumstances could offer, I really hope that you can find someone local that can be this for you both xx

Sending you love and hugs - always here if anyone feels that they need a phone chat on a bad day  ^hugme^

Love

Kiwi x

Offline dreamer100

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  • My family is finally complete 3 girls and 1 angel
Hi All,

Sophie's hospital visit went well and we are finally able to take her on holiday, we have booked to go to Cyprus in May I must admit I am scared to take her anywhere but I think we could all do with a change of scenery.
 It really didnt help when I was in the waiting room at the nurse/ co-worker said where's the other twin?only 1 with u today -  my heart sank !!!!!  I said "What do u mean?" she then said "excuse me will be back in 5"  I think my look said it all.  Anyway when I was called she said she was having a bad day - Well I couldnt stop thinking about that all day.

Budgie -    I think we have had the same / silmilar experience, with extremly prem labour (23+4) then losing one after a day or two and finally the long journey throught ITU & Scuba, maybe we could chat on the phone ?? what area do you live? maybe  help each other  :) When you write on your posts I feel its what I am thinking.

P.S  - I am trying to be kinder to hubby but he said he understands so he never got round to packing his bags ^idiot^


Michelle

Offline kiwitk

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Hi Girls,

Budgie it must be hard to find other people, if the groups cant help, it's not like you can tell with Mums onthe street who's been thru the same experience, sounds like someone needs to start up a website to get mum's with similar experiences together for support in their local areas.  Hopefully someone on FF in your area will spot our thread and get in touch :)

Dreamer a holiday - how exciting!  This will be a major mental hurdle to get over and a wonderful opportunity for you and your hubby to reconnect away from the home environment :)

My little guy seems to still be doing well, lots of kicks and flipflops in there!  Next scan is this Thursday so it'll be good to get that visual reassurance and the measurements to make sure he's growing and developing ok.  I'm back to work on Monday for the first time in a month, not looking forward to Monday rush hour on the M3/M25!

Went to an NCT nearly new sale in the area yesterday and picked up a few bargains - a bouncy seat, nappy stacker, some pumpkin patch long sleeve t's, 4 cute little overall and t's sets and a sleeping bag for when he's a bit older :)  Total bargins but the sale was a bun fight - women everywhere and not enough room in the aisles to get through!

Hubbys back tomorrow after a week away so looking forward to having him back again :) 

Love and hugs for everyone xx

Offline budgie

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Hi all

Dreamer, I have sent you a pm.  Great that you are going on holiday.  We are in the process of sorting out a trip to France.  I too am nervous to take Nathan out of the country but at the same time looking forward to a change.  Glad the hospital visit went well except for the nurse!  When Nathan first came home we asked for his details to be changed because letters kept coming through saying Twin1 after his name and I couldn't bear seeing that.  Now I kind of regret this as thats who he is.

When I was at the toddler group last week a lady asked if Nathan was my only child and I said yes.  I felt bad saying that but its easier.  On friday I took Nathan to the doctors and a lady in the waiting room asked if he was my only child.  I said "he has a twin brother but he died".  It was uncomfortable for her but its the truth.  Still don't know what the best way to handle things is though!

Kiwi, glad to hear all is well with you.  Good luck with work, let us know how you get on.

Much love to you and hope everyone else ok......

XX


Offline kiwitk

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Hi Budgie,

Looks like we're on our own these days :)  Had my scan this morning and everything is great with Baby Boy, he's grown well since the last scan and his growth measurements are exactly in the middle of of the normal range which is great news!

Hopefully onward and upward from here.... exciting development, actually saw my tummy jump slightly when he kicked a few minutes ago, it's the first time so very exciting!

Hope everyone is well xx

 

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