Has anyone gone ahead with IVF with low AMH? (Part 7)

[siann]

Hi there

Sorry that I have been awol recently I have been quite ill.  Anyway congrats all you pg girls hope all goes well with your scans etc xx

Fingers crossed to all you pupo girls too   

Farmgirl - hope you ok, its good to let your hair down, especially at this time of year.

Aimess - hope you ok.  21st Feb is actually my birthday.  I kept getting delays at UCH/CRGH and its really frustrating and upsetting, you just want to get going as you feel that you have waited long enough.  Once it got delayed for 3 months because the PCT made them reapply for funding for all of their NHS patients. Hang in there.

I am a North London girl too so would be interested in any meet ups and especially the counselling support group, Aimess.

AFM - I went for my first appointment at Create yesterday.  What a massive change to where I was before. My scan was brilliant I had 8 in my antral follicle count and apparently the blood flow to ovaries and uterus is excellent.  She catagorically said that it was my ovarian surgery that caused my low amh as they take eggs away when they do it.  I wish they had told me that at the time.  So I go and see the treatment nurse next week and I am starting a mild IVF cycle in Jan, she is very positive. For the first time I have some positivity which is great. I m nervous as never done a cycle with drugs but she is convinced that they can get some decent eggs to put back.

Hope everyone else is well. Will do more persos later xxx

[Mrs ABA]

Wow Siann - that is really good news.  Hope you are feeling better and sorry to hear you haven't been well.  Great to hear you are a fellow North Londoner and hope to get to meet you!


I had a session with my counsellor today and feel a bit better - yesterday was hard having to make lots of small talk with new Mums at a concert.


Farmgirl - I am with you in wanting to bury 2011 as a thoroughly rubbish year.  Do try to have a good new years eve if you can.  We are off to Italy for 4 days.  Blow the budget but can't wait!


On the subject of pg chat on this board - it is fabulous that there have been some bfps recently, especially after a fairly long run of bfns and we know you girls and are absolutely routing for your success.  And we know that you are really kind people and want to support the rest of us.  But I would say though, and am perhaps speaking for some others, that this is the only place we get to speak to women who are still stuck in the interminable waiting room, and although we share your joy that you have now got that wonderful, and for many of us mythical bfp, some of the scan chat can be a bit hard for us.  Don't mean to offend anyone - hope that doesn't sound harsh.


  to absolutely all of you


A
x

[siann]

Mrs Aba - Hope to meet you too. we looked at moving to Crouch end as we love it there but it was a tad too expensive for what we wanted.  Can I ask where you got your counsellor from?  I really need to get one but I don't know where to start.  Glad you feel better, I don't envy you having to make small talk with new Mums. xx

[Mrs ABA]

That would be fantastic - Saacha has suggested the kings Head at 1pm on the 14 Jan and the wonderful Aimees is hoping to set up a regular FF meet, so hopefully one of those will work for you too.  PS - we moved to Crouch End because of the proximity of schools...


My counsellor is also a hypnotherapist - I will pm you her details.  That approach isn't for everyone though I find it helpful, but I also know via a friend of a more standard counsellor who practices in Muswell Hill if you like.


Hope you get some relaxation over Christmas before you start next year!


A
x

[aimees]

hi ladies,

i've been struck down with a lurgy and feeling very poorly... am just re-surfacing

Minxylarue, Mandypandy and Moos good luck to you all over the next couple of weeks, be kind on yourself and  for BFPs for you all

Lola good luck for your scan on Monday  - it's normal to feel like this I guess but you have a good chance of it being fine  have you had your results from immunes test? sorry if you've posted it this week, there's a lot to catch up on

Siann im so pleased about your scan! It sounds fanstiastic and good news about the blood flow, the antral follicles. I'm very impressed, it sounds like such a change from your last cycle. Congrats to you, 2012 could be a great year for you. Did you do it at the north London satellite clinic or in south London?

Farmgirl - you wrap it up girl! I so hope 2012 is kinder to you than 2011. 

afm - been poorly but on the mend. I had my last session with the barts counsellor who i've seen for a year, I felt so sad I burst into tears. I hate good byes. Had to buy some kiddie presents today, in tears in the shop yet again. But feeling much better now  There seems to be some debate about pregnancy chat here. I have to agree with Mrs Aba. While I'm really happy for my low AMH sisters who've had recent success, and we definitely needed it on this thread, when it gets too much and there's talk about scans and pg signs and symptoms, I feel I have to avoid coming on here, and it's a shame as it's really my only solace.

xx

[lola33]

Siann- So really happy to hear about your scan, 8 follies sounds fabulous I'm sure mild IVF is a right choice for you and will get good results and that very positive attitude of yours does hurt either

Mrs A and Aimees- you are absolutely right and thank you for being honest, this thread is for support before and during tx and I know you all happy for the ladies that got BFP, but it is still painfull to read about the details and emotions surrounding it......and it is very understandable.  So I will definitely not get into any details on here.

Aimees- sorry you are feeling a bit low really hope thar Chrismas in the cottage will take your mind away from all things fertility for a while I was very lucky, ladies at Dr G are stars, they chased up and got my re-test results today! I don't know how they look yet, but at least if everything goes well on Monday  I will know what to have IL or Ivig.....actually very curious about the results, my CD56 were of the charts last time, so will be interesting to see if the any change

Xx

[Maisyz]

Mrs Aba and Aimees I agree with you. I recently went AWOL from this site big time for the same reason as Aimees. I was struggling to deal with losing Mork and Mindy and I'm struggling now given that Ches would have been due next month. Really don't want to upset anyone and I am happy for you etc but glad Mrs A and Aimees have been honest so I am being as well.

Maisy x

[Caz]

Hi ladies, because there's been a bit of discussion and I know a few of you have been in contact with us about it, I think I need to just clarify the guidelines for pregnancy and parenting chat so that everyone who uses this thread is clear on what they mean in real terms.

The guidelines state:

Guidelines For Pregnancy And Parenting Discussions


Fertility Friends is a site that supports people who face the struggle to become a parent with fertility issues or when needing assisted conception. While it is always inspiring when members are successful, we all need to be respectful of the feelings of those still on the journey, or who have exhausted all options and are facing a life without children. Fertility Friends is often a safe haven - the only place those members can come and feel there are others who understand. As you might imagine, one of the most difficult aspects for those struggling to conceive, is dealing with baby and pregnancy chat/pictures etc. in real life. Members who come here should be able to do so without worry that what they see and read here will cause upset to them. 
We have created some very specific designated areas where members who have overcome their infertility can share and support each other on the ongoing journey through parenthood.

Outside these designated areas (see Exceptions, below), please keep discussions about your or others' pregnancy and babies to a minimum.  As a general rule this means you should be posting no more than the very basic information, consisting of a line or two of text.

(Click here for the guidelines in full: http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=260253.msg4364142#msg4364142)

I realise this is a bit vague and that is somewhat deliberate because we do think you're all sensible and mature adults who are more than capable of showing empathy and support for others where you need to, and can adapt your own behaviour to suit the needs of the threads you post on.

In reality what these guidelines mean is that yes, you can absolutely talk about your pregnancy here. Saying something like "Hi guys, I had a scan today and everything is fine" is perfectly ok. Where is becomes perhaps not ok is when you post details of crown to rump lengths, talk about waving babies, discussing symptoms of pregnancy (morning sickenss etc.) and cures for them... and later on that would extend to discussions about baby requisites you might be buying etc. Those things - even if it's posted in a supportive way, need to be taken to an appropriate Pregnancy and Parenting thread/section: http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=28.0

In addition to this there is a need to think of what you are sharing in context with everyone and everything else around. This might be simple things you can do like chosing not to share something pregnancy related if you see someone else is having a hard time, (you can always share a day or two later) or just acknowledging that person A hasn't posted for a while and making sure you include asking after them in your posts. If you work to the loose rule of halves - i.e. if you post something pregnancy related, post at least the same amount of something non-pregnancy related. This last tip really does help to break up the flow if there is a lot of ladies with a BFP on a thread at any one time.


I would just like to say that no one post here has been deemed inappropriate at the moment; everything you have all said and posted in isolation has been fine. As a whole, sometimes there has been a few posts that have been pregnancy heavy but sometimes this is just because the traffic through the thread has followed in that way and not because of any insensitive comments by anyone. However it is something you need to be aware of and try and avoid where possible. But I also need to point out to those who might well be struggling, even with tiny snippets of pregnancy information, that you too need to make others aware of where you are emotionally so that the know how to adjust their posts to support you too. And please bear in mind that, like the pregnancy and parenting areas where we fully allow that talk, we also have areas off FF where we have banned it completely in recognition that there are those who need support away from any mention of it: http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=539.0

I really hope everyone here can continue to support everyone else and I would encourage you all to nurture the strong bonds of friendship and support you have formed.

Caz

[LJyorkshire]

Hi ladies

Been reading but not much energy for posting.

Marie ..we must have a coffee and mince pie during the festive season..been rubbish at keeping in touch..it's such a manic time of year. DP and I watched the adoption programme..weird we had the opposite reaction to Maisie..made me want tI give up tx and he on the waiting list. Though in reality not QUITE there yet. Good few tears shed here too. My aunt who is 60 and has grown up kids has fostered difficult children for last 15 years and is now applying to become permanent carers of 4 brothers and sisters as no adoptive parents can be found for all 4 and SS want to split them up. The youngest is only 4 so they will have parenting responsibility for next 14 years..they are an amazing couple!

The 3 M's..hope your 2ww's are not too awful. Must be hard to take it easy at this time of year. Hoping Santa brings some extra special surprises down the chimney this year...

Farmgirl - was so sad to hear about your BFN. Bah- humbug to 2011 and fertile fairy dust for 2012. Hope you're doing ok Hun

Our lovely pregnant ladies..good luck with the scans and the nerves. It's hard hearing that the scan wait is tougher than the 2ww for those of us well into our 40's who have never known even once the thrill of 2 blue lines but please don't stay away..we need your positive stories to make us believe one day it could be us. Delighted for you all.

Maisy - I'm in the same boat coming up to 9 months since first cycle. Hard not to think...what if??? But we are stronger than we think we are and we must be due a break

Lyrical - you ok Hun? You sounded a bit low last time I saw a post..think you're having a few days away?

AFM - been lying low. Had got into bit of a depressed rut and decided I needed to do something about it so had EFT this week and boy did the emotions come flooding out?! Felt more positive since..like I've been in a dark tunnel and there may be a glimmer of light. I have decided to try and be proud of what I've been through this year to help me try and achieve our dream, rather than see it as a wasted year. I turn 42 in Jan which is horrifying as the dreaded charts plummet again but you never know...

My sis is re-testing her AMH and AFC in 4-5 weeks so we'll see what that brings..otherwise we may be taking a trip to Serum and see if we can bag some baby joy Greek-.styley?!

Hope the Christmas shopping is not too painful ..I had to buy presents from Mothercare and the Disney store. Awful. Just awful. Next year if not pregnant will boycott them and buy online instead..

Love and hugs to all

LJ x

[aimees]

LJ it's great to hear from you. Am so sorry to hear how down you've been, but I think your plan of being proud of yourself for such a difficult year is a very positive and brave thing to do. You are very stoic and it's admirable and you should be proud of yourself. I think we can all be proud of ourselves, I know most people on here have had some dark times and struggled a lot, some people have acheived their dreams and some people are still, as Mrs Aba so brilliantly puts it, in the 'waiting room'. I know what you mean about the baby shop. It's children's books that always gets me, I'm a great lover of books, I used to work in children's publishing and still have some of the books from then that I thought I would pass down to my children. I remember so vividly the joy I got as a child when I read a book and looked at the pictures and still have some of my favourite ones. So needless to say i tend to buy books for all the kiddies and I found yesterday really hard, standing in the children's section of Foyles crying over all the beautiful books that I would love to be buying for my own child, it made me feel quite resentful of my friends.

Caz thank you for clearing up the rules for us all. You mentioned that it's important that we are honest about our feelings and I think that is probably the key here. If someone is finding it hard to cope, we have to speak up, which I guess can be hard sometimes as no one wants to look like they are being resentful or jealous. I think jealousy does come into it, I know for me I struggle with it a lot, I have never had a BFP and just can't imagine that it would ever happen or what it would be like, so when people say they have had BFP I just feel like they are living on a different planet to me. Equally I find it encouraging and I'm happy for them too. It's not straightforward.

Lola good luck on MOnday  and also with the CD56 results. It's definitely very interesting as if they have come down it means that all your effort has worked, which would be very satisfying. I'm supposed to get my TNFa re-tested today but I'm not sure it's a good idea with this lurgy, surely it would mean I might be having a flare? I'm quite surprised at being ill as I don't tend to get colds, perhaps the humira has brought down my immunes too.  One of the doctors I work with for my job is actually an immunes specialist, and he's so nice. I'm dying to ask him about it all but don't feel I could. I dont feel too low at the moment, I just had a bit of tears yesterday, but I actually quite like crying, I tend to bottle things up so crying always feels like such a relief for me.

xxx