A place to share experiences and advice, normally on FF we would have a cycle thread then other threads that would cover after treatment support. As there is just a few of you at the moment that are regularly posting I think we should just keep it to the one thread. All I would ask is that as before you keep your chat on topic, respectful and supportive... Basically just keep doing what you have been doing
Shout out if you need anything, but I will leave you all in one anothers capable hands
I convinced myself that it would never work - how could it with 4 top grade embryos and 2 failed attempts (the first being a miscarriage). Surely my body was killing everything off?! No one can explain why out of 4 embryos of the same grade 1 made the cut and is sleeping as I type.
No rhyme or reason other than your embryo is there somewhere wait
As I was saying, you embryo is there waiting for you. Dr Levy is a determined guy and won't give up. He will hopefully give you some of his thoughts based on years of experience but of course you do still have a few days to go yet. I do understand that you will be wanting to make plans in your mind now though.
Hi Magnusi!
I always tested early, including in my positive cycle. I completely understand where you're coming from. I do hope the bfn is due to having tested too early but at the same time I like your mindset of thinking what if it's bfn as that tells you won't give up. I love the fact that Milsten is here to support you. I feel a bit guilty that it worked first time for us and I think it's because of lucky people like myself that others have to do a few rounds (otherwise the statistics would be 100% success rate). I had had 5 previous bfn but not with DE.
Hang in there, please don't give up
Can't wait to read your BFP.
Love
Carito
hi Magnusi
Fingers crossed that you just tested too early and there is good news round the corner!
If its not, then i agree with the others that you should make sure you get a call in with Dr Levy and get his views on the long list of questions I'm sure you'll have - and there's obviously a reason why they offer 6 attempts in the shared risk programme.
Don't give up yet
S xxx
Hey ladies,
Such wise words for Magnusi. And agree with Carito, I feel so lucky to have had success first time with SG, but of course not everyone is so lucky. As Milsten says, sometimes there is no rhyme or reason, it is just a roll of the dice and absolutely, hard as it may be to remain determined, YOUR little embie that is meant to is out there waiting.
I think with each failure we do get closer to our goal, unfair as it may seem at the time. I also keep thinking that SG offers 6 fresh cycles under shared risk, so Dr Levy must know that it takes some couples a few tries.
Not sure I'm helping at all here. But thinking of you Magnusi.
Oh and I'm sure any newbie's won't be put off, I think this forum needs to show all the highs and lows.
xxx
Magnusi, just wondered how you are? Any better news?
I agree with c chick, you won't have put anyone off. People understand there are no guarantees. I hope you get to talk to Dr Levy. As everyone has said, they offer 6 cycles for a reason. If this one is bad news then let's hope you only need one more.
Xx
Thanks for all checking in on me and wise words. So the HCG was negative - nothing had happened. I spoke to Dr Levy last night and he was fabulous in answering my long list of questions quite candidly. He said that I do have a reduced chance of getting pregnant as I have problems with my lining and it's function is questionable. He said that I probably have a 35-40% chance of getting pregnant with a fresh transfer (compared to the average 60%).
I am very up and down at the moment and every day I am dealing with different emotions. This morning I woke at about 6am and couldn't help but think about all of the events that have taken place over the last 5 years.
Sorry be back soon.
x
What do I do??!!!! I have just lost my email again!
Anyway, in a nutshell I am taking some time out from treatment for a while. Maybe once Ofsted have been and gone I can think about going in for another try.
All the best Steph and Chick with on going pregnancies. I will be logging on to read how you are doing.
Everyone else enjoy your precious precious times with your little ones. Please know how much I have appreciated all of your messages.
Magnusi
xxxxx
Hopefully taking a bit of time out will allow you to regroup and consider next steps. Dr Levy also gave us a reduced chance of it working after my 2nd failed attempt (1 fresh and 1 frozen at that point) and it's not nice hearing that your chances have reduced. Following that call I then got a BFP which resulted in my DD. Although my energy to carry on had significantly reduced at that point, I'm obviously glad I didn't give up.
Hey Magnusi - sorry, had the MIL down this weekend and haven't had a chance to reply.
I'm so, so sorry it was BFN.
I really wish there was something I could say to make things better for you.
I'm glad that Dr Levy answered all your concerns thoroughly, but it must be a knock back to hear about your reduced chances. However, please take comfort from Milsten's words. I know it's easy for me to say as I'm expecting after my first attemp, but I still think 35-40% is a very good chance - it just may take you a little longer. It may not feel like it now, but you will get there, I know it. A little time out to regroup and gather your strenght back will do you good.
Don't ever give up on your dream until you're ready and don't ever think you don't deserve it.
Big hugs xxx
Hi Magnusi,
There's no much that I can say now that will make you feel better, except perhaps that I'm sure that one day you'll look back and this bump in the road will feel like a very distant event and it won't hurt nor matter anymore.
I echo Chelseachick words and also hope that you follow your heart. I'm sure you will have your BFP. You may want to take time off, you may feel that you need to take time off this board. Do whatever helps you to regroup. We will be here when you need encouragement, empathy or maybe just venting!
Take care,
Carito
I'm so very sorry to hear your news - I wish I could wave a magic wand and make it a different outcome. Big hugs to you.
As the others have said, taking some time out from this all consuming process might be a good idea to rebuild your strength. Dr Levy is still giving you that 35-40% which is still a good chance, even though it's lower than before.
Only you can decide next steps but maybe take your time in making those decisions.
We're here for you.
S xxx
Magnusi, I'm so sorry but you are sounding incredibly resistant!
I believe in life you know when you are at the end of a journey and you are clearly not at the end of yours! You seem such a positive woman
As all the others have said take some time then come back on here and we will be there for you. I remember the OE stats for me being less than 5 %!! So hang in there with the DE stats which in comparison are extremely hopeful xx
I can't believe I'm actually posting this but I'm back out for a FET!!
Our wee daughter is almost one and we felt we would always regret it if we didn't try for a sibling. As we are both in our forties ( geriatric in the fertility world ) there was no time for hanging about. Our daughter has brought us immeasurable joy. I honestly still pinch myself with how blessed we have been thanks to shady grove.
So after a long journey I'm here on my own and suffering serious separation anxiety from DD!!! I've never left her before for more than a few hours. Poor hubby has been tortured by my million questions already about how he's managing
So my transfer is tomorrow and I'll keep you posted.
Sorry this is a very me post but I also wanted to say hi to you all and a special hello to Magnusi...hope you are doing ok
Bye for now, I need to sleep even though it's only uk bedtime!
Wow, that is amazing little ted! Huge amounts of luck for your FET! Oh I know how you feel, I hated being away from DD and DH when I went out to SG. I certainly now can't imagine going back out there and leaving two DDs behind...although a bit of peace sounds quite nice..!
Keeping everything crossed for you Little Ted! If we had any frozen embryos we would have done the same. I'm sure you are missing your DD enormously but hopefully you'll be bringing home a little sibling for her.
Funnily enough I quite miss the Washington DC visits!!
Little ted - fab news all went went and you've got a little one on board. Wishing you all the luck in the world! Hope you can rest up a bit despite missing DD. Bet Washington is different in the summer - it was late winter/early spring for us.
Quick update from me - almost 23 weeks!!! Seems to be going really slowly at the mo - am wishing my life away, am desperate to get further on so I know things will be ok even if they put in an early appearance!!
Hi All and Hi Little Ted! Sorry for the late reply!
Little ted - so, so pleased for you. Sending you lots of luck. It's so exciting. I just love the fact that when you go over to Shady Grove you feel so relaxed and it's like going to see old friends.
Glad your DH and LO are donig fine, won't be long until you're back home
Yes, please keep us posted.
Hey Steph - 23 weeks, yay! It will start to go quicker! I found after my 28 midwife appt it's just wizzed by.
AFM - 34 weeks this weekend and I finish work on 30 Sept OMG!
Movements have become much more robust in the last week, it's lovely. I just want him here safely now. Everyone tells me that's when the real worrying will start!!
Packed my hospital bag last night - and a separate bag for baby's bits - so feel a little calmer now.
My little sis is organising a baby shower for me on 4 Oct - 4 weeks before I'm due - so we are waiting to buy our last few essentials (Car seat and iCandy!) until after that in case we get vouchers or items on our list. Hopefully that won't be too late?!
Sorry that sounds very greedy doesn't it! I really do not expect anything, but would be silly to buy everything I need before the shower I think just in case!
xxx
Thanks girls for your good wishes. I'm awake early but reckoned I'm here for such a short time there's not much point adapting to US time
Steph, can't believe you are 23 weeks already and of course it's natural to want to be further on! I'm sure you are also very excited. I loved being pregnant although of course it's stressful too. Keep well
CC, I loved stopping work! In fact it's exactly a year since I did! Going back next month mind you
You sound very organised and I think you are right to wait until your baby shower as I had one and my friends were so generous. Between that and when our DD was born we really had to buy so little. One bit of advice, babies really only need babygros for the first few months rather than other clothes if you know what I mean! So I'd advise just keeping your earlier purchases simple. We didn't know what we were having so that involved a lot of white at the start
Look after yourself
Thank you Chelsea chick! Not long until you finish work, yippee
Actually I've been very distracted on the 2 ww with our DD so it definitely hasn't been as bad as usual although still googling stuff
Not much in the way of symptoms other than cramping etc which I'm not being fooled by! Test at the start of next week. I honestly have no clue if it's worked! Really It has.
The only negative is my backside hurts like mad and I've had some big bleeders from the jabs but I think that's not helped by my taking aspirin.
Xx
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