* Author Topic: Telling the child and other people, Chat/Support thread  (Read 195670 times)

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Offline Lisianthus

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Telling the child and other people, Chat/Support thread
« Reply #590 on: 26/11/20, 16:48 »
Hello, this is my first time posting about this.
My DC is donor conceived - have been havering  how & when to tell him - he's 6. It just came out in a conversation earlier this week, flowed naturally on from what we were talking about. He wasn't fazed in the slightest, but immediately asked the donor's name which threw me . I told him the clinic wouldn't tell me the donor's name but that he could find out when he is older - it made me really glad that we opted for treatment in the UK, which we chose because we wanted him to be able to find out about the donor if he wants too. Weve been reading 'The Cow that Laid an Egg' since he was little &  I think that helped. Then the conversation just moved on to something else.
The clinic confirmed that our egg sharer's cycle was not successful but I guess that doesn't rule out other half siblings.
I still have a lot to process emotionally but at least I've told him & got the ball rolling.
I have finally had a second successful cycle & am 11 weeks with DC number 2, also donor conceived, & suspect his/her safe arrival (fingers crossed) will prompt more conversations.

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    Offline louise48910

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    Telling the child and other people, Chat/Support thread
    « Reply #591 on: 9/12/20, 21:02 »
    Hi Kjade, thanks for that! I'm on a few social media groups now and get lots of support with that. It's weird being both a product and recipient of donor sperm!

    Lisanthus! Great to hear your talking about it went well. I've no idea what the right way to do it is but I guess referring to it in an equally casual way here and there makes sense. We've got a book - stupidly ordered the egg one haha, that I read to my son (age 3) and it just sits on his shelf and he gets it out every so often. Hoping it just becomes part of his life and it isn't a shock. I get why people don't tell and I'm pretty chilled about finding out but in our situation it's what's right for us.

    Congratulations! I think a new baby is a definitely a good opportunity to explain how the baby got there :)

    Offline Rio2016

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    Telling the child and other people, Chat/Support thread
    « Reply #592 on: 9/12/20, 22:35 »
    Oh so interesting about the donors name. Thats something Id answer the same way. Do you have pics of your donor? Ive not shown anyone the ones I have. Only got two and not looked at them in a long while. But from memory my daughter does look like the donor.

    Were also expecting no. 2 but my daughter will be too young then to understand much as only 2 next year xx