* Author Topic: home education diary  (Read 56629 times)

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Offline mierran

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Do i move my son from his current school, if i can?
« Reply #10 on: 24/09/14, 00:15 »
Hi,
so happy things are happening quickly for your sons sake

I would advise get the book " free range education".

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Free-Range-Education-Home-Works/dp/1903458072

I found it great. It is made up of chapters written by different people with different experiences. It shows not all is easy but it shows everything is normal , everyone has bad days etc. I found there were chapters that chimed with my philosophy,  and others that I felt no, this way isn't for me. It helped me crystalise what I did want from home ed.

re home ed there are 3 main ways you can do it

Most kids coming out of school require a period of " deschooling " where they do nothing formal education based and just find themselves again

longer term you can do autonomous or child led education. Here there are no lessons and you just live life learning eg maths and english while shopping, take a camera and do a photography project in walk to park etc

second method is home schooling where you set up a school at home. You can either do correspondence courses or you can get stuff on line to do

the third way is what appeals to me, which is a mixture of the two called eclectic learning. You have eg a broad theme for the week and work stuff round that. So you have a building site near you. You lok at how houses are built, at plans, how many houses you could build on a piece of land. You look at houses in different countries.  You go and look at the building site and draw pictures/ take photos of the equipment and look online to see what each one does. You get a few bricks and a cheap bag of morter and build a little wall. Etc etc etc

The other book I found useful is a kindle one called I think everything homeschooling.  It is America so some of the terminology different and laws etc but a good overview

http://www.amazon.co.uk/The-Everything-Homeschooling-Book-Environment/dp/1605501352

this site has a list of years and what they should learn so you can use it as a checklist

http://www.worldbook.com/typical-course-of-study

Again american but you just transcibe age over. Tho I did have to look up what they meant by ordinal and cardinal numbers ( and I have a uni degree  ;D )

I also found

http://www.home-education.biz/forum/home-education-forums/

quite useful, tho there are some who have a bee in bonnet over girfec. But you get some slightly odd folk everywhere

I hope some of that helps.

I have said I will fill in the applications for school as ( in Scotland ) that doesn't legally obliged you to going. It is foot in door that means you're in the system. So next summer will be the point at which I decide tho, if kids continue to want to go, I'm not forcing my views on them.

any questions just ask. I am sure your son will be much happier learning out of school. And it needn't be forever.  It may be that he decides he wants to give school another go. I also have heard a lot of people say places mysteriously appear in full schools if you are a home schooler, as compared to transferring from another school , as some are keen on all kids being in school.

hope you are both feeling a bit happier. Big hugs and feel free to pm me if you want .

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    Offline jdm4tth3ws

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    Do i move my son from his current school, if i can?
    « Reply #11 on: 24/09/14, 12:11 »
    Hi merrian,
    hes happier. im a bit a bit overwhelmed and keep bursting into tears if im honest. the aheer enormity of it all frightens me.
    thank you for all those links.  really appreciate it.
    im having a hard time with the deschooling aspect tbh. hes happy playing games on the pc, number jacks, cbeebies and atm war games. i have a real issue with it as he 'should be learning'. i am trying to tell myself he is. strategy, reading (instructions) fine motor skills(moving finger round mousepad) but im not convinced. i wanted to sit down with him and we both devise a timetable and subject matter, but he wants the laptop.
    hoping i have made the right decision, but cant help feeling bad - what if ive just screwed up his academic chances.
    i know his emotional well being is paramount, but academia is important too. i just dont feel im upto the job at hand. it all seems so BIG and scary!
    my youngest is at reception and altho he loves school, hes seeing A at home and wants to stay home too. im worried what effect its going to have on him. i also worry the teachers will give J a hard time because of the current political BS between myself and the head.
    aaarrgghhh. have i just majorly screwed up big time?
    but thank you, for your aupport, and i hope it will be continued. good luck with the xoming school yrs. nursery, reception he loved. he didnt steuggle with work factor in yr 1, just rhe bullying from a kid and his teachet.
    what if ive done the wrong thing!

    Offline mierran

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    Do i move my son from his current school, if i can?
    « Reply #12 on: 24/09/14, 22:08 »
    You haven't. 

    Don't worry about academics. Your son will learn lots. Look at this as an interim period - a period of adjustment.  He has to recover from the trauma he has been through. 

    Put something like horrible histories on tv. When you go shopping get him to keep a rough count of how much you are spending. Get him to pay counting the money he gives over and working out how much change there should be.

    Home education is a journey for you both. There will be good days and bad.  However,  a few things to bear in mind are

    1 - how much is he learning at the moment?  How to be miserable and how powerless he is over his life sounds like about it

    2- it is not a decision for life. A lot of home ed youngsters go back into mainstream ed after a year or two, or when secondary school starts. So you are not planning the rest of his life

    3- it is a joint a decision you have made as a family. You are not alone in this

    re your younger son you can explain to him that his big brother was having problems at school with people being nasty to him. Say this is not normally a problem but because of it,  he will be learning at home with you. Talk to him. If he consistently wants to leave school so what. Let him. I believe he will get a superior education being home ed.

    I know it seems scary but it is also exciting. You are starting a journey. So what if you feel sections of your education are missing. You are not teaching him - you are helping him to learn. You are not spoon feeding him knowledge.  Let him play on his tablet but limit time. Encourage him to play eg minecraft, strategy games. Even car racing games teach coordination.  Also give him some pc time as it is good to get and keep mouse skills. And if you have a laptop.
    I don't know what cbbc site like but cbeebies one great for games that teach things

    what does he need to learn before secondary  school?  He needs to learn to read and write, use a tablet and computer. He needs to learn a bit about the world we live in - its history,  geography and social structure. He needs to learn to deal with other people.

    These are all things he can learn through home ed. And without the damage school is causing him.

    Join some of the groups for home eds. And read free range education.  You will see you are not alone in your fears. But you tried trusting others and t didn't work for your son. You will do a far better job yourself. You taught him to use a toilet, talk, use cutlery, interact with others. You didn't need a teacher to do that

     
    Big hugs and take it one step at a time.  We are conditioned to expect to send our kids to school and told we can't do a good job of teaching them. But all the great minds up until the last 100 years were home ed.

    Offline jdm4tth3ws

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    Do i move my son from his current school, if i can?
    « Reply #13 on: 24/09/14, 23:18 »
    Merrian,
    you talk a lot of sense! guess the tears will stop when i get over the shock of it all :-)
    have bought those to home ed books off ebay. knowledge is power. may give me some much needed confidence.
    i have hid the laptop! too many hours on it today. we have shopping in the morning. the afternoon isnt planned yet. this is my problem atm there is no planning in my life. i like plans/routines/structure. i have no structure right now.
    going to a home ed meet up on friday.

    interestingly, J sat and did 7 pages of a workbook i bought for him the other day. tracing letters, although he still not sure of many of them yet.
    he got stickers :-)
    thank you again. will keep reading your words of encouragement over the days/weeks when i dont feel confident.
    i hope you are feeling a bit better
    jade xxx

    Offline mierran

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    Do i move my son from his current school, if i can?
    « Reply #14 on: 24/09/14, 23:52 »
    Ta,
    so long as I avoid wheat, dairy and limit fruit pulses etc tum much better ta. Worth it in the end. I just hope it improves post birth  :-\

    I think you'll find the books good. And I hope there are some you bond with at the home ed meeting. I found a lot of them a bit too autonomous ( child led -no lessons just kids doing what they wanted with dicipline seeming to be a bit of an unknown ) for me at local group which, combined with my surgery and kids nursery meant I stopped going. But most home eders aren't like that.

    it may also be worth asking one of the home ed local education people if they can put you in touch with anyone, once you have a more firm idea of what your approach will be.

    and remember,  every family is different.  Look and find out what feels right for you. Try different things. Keep talking.

    Great that he did 7 pages of a workbook.  Bet that he has got more out of the last 2 daya than the last 2 weeks.

    big hugs and be kind to yourself too. You have been through a lot between all the if stuff and this. Remember,  it is normal to be scared and feel overwhelmed by change. It will take a bit of time to work out what time works for you.

    one thing to think about is when suits your son best for learning. For lots of kids it is 10-12 in the morning ( remember you are doing quality learning. You don't need all the time at school as not breaks,  teacher telling off kids, etc etc ) and then you have the afternoon free. For others it works best doing work in the evening.  Work out what suits you.

    big hugs.

    x x

    Offline ayah

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    Do i move my son from his current school, if i can?
    « Reply #15 on: 25/09/14, 02:35 »
    Hi Jade,

    Just wanted to say sorry that you have had to taje your son out of school as he was being failed.

    But dont look back,  i would imagine its very dounting for you but you described some attributes that will help you make it a great success. Organised, structure, routine,  you only took him out few days ago so dont expect too much of either of you.  Teachers have a year training oost grad, spend time pklanning lessons and have other teachers and the national carriculum for support.  Give him some time out whikst you olan your schooling.  Youll soon make up lost time.  Remember youll be teaching him one to one.  Aa for pc games, rry teaching him time managment. Ser a length of time he can play and time it or show him on clock what time he must stop.  Also use pc for tyoing a story or writting sums the you can print off for him to do.

    All best and dont feel guilt or regrert.  You can do it with some suppirt.  Oh and some measeums I believe do things for home schoolers.

    Mierran congratulations and all best.

    Ayah xxx

    Offline jdm4tth3ws

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    « Reply #16 on: 25/09/14, 19:17 »
    Thanks mierrian and ayah.
    we had a brilliant day today. took him for a day out. To a local nature and science centre. was naughty and took J as well. told the school he wasnt very well. back at school tomorrow unfortunately. do you know i might give A some settling in time then.pull.J put as well. as hes only 4 technically he doesnt have to be in the school system till hes 5 anyway, if thats the route i choose for him.
    we pressed buttons, checked out insects, climbing frames, adventured and above all had fun.
    git home around 5pm and he made up a glider and then.painted it. not bad for poundland.
    we did erupting snow experiment and now dh is trying to bed them down.
    really good day! just chilling out and having fun. got 10 discount on membership card to local centre.
    one day at a time

    Offline mierran

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    Do i move my son from his current school, if i can?
    « Reply #17 on: 25/09/14, 22:37 »
    Aya -ta.  :)

    Jade - Glad you had a good day.  There are so many free/cheap things you can do. And sounds like you all had fun, connected as a family, and learned lots too. And well done on the 10 discount  ;D as you get to know folk there, and esp as you can go off peak ie not in school hols they will get a lot of personal tutorials etc too. And you can take things from today as a starting block. Ask questions about some of the stuff you saw today. It's fine if you don't know the answer - you can find out together.

    I think the bbc has a section on their website about questions too which looks like it may be a good resource.

    When they get older, most museums,  country houses etc that charge have discounts for home educators tho you need to contact in advance and speak to their education department. They will also give you the same info packs etc schools get.

    did you get the everything homeschooling book on kindle? You can get the free app for laptop, and I see the book is actually free atm ( I paid for it but well worth it ). It has a lot of free/cheap resources in it and links to websites etc which are quite good.

    Do you feel like you are finding your son again?

    Big hugs and glad all went well today.  And I hope tomorrow you have a good time at the home ed meeting.

    x x

    Offline Blondie71

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    Do i move my son from his current school, if i can?
    « Reply #18 on: 25/09/14, 23:12 »
    I'm so glad you've done this for your son!!! It was very heartbreaking reading your first post I could really feel his pain and desperation coming through in your writing so much, I hope I'd be as courageous as you if my children ever feel that way and that I wouldn't hesitate to try what you are doing, what a great mummy you are xox

    Offline jdm4tth3ws

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    « Reply #19 on: 25/09/14, 23:51 »
    Hi merrian and blondie,
    merrian. im very old skool - i dont like kindles :-D so i have ordered the actual books off ebay. should be here within the next 3 days :-D thank you for all the info and continued support.
    today was a home ed meet as well. was v nervous, but i reminded myself im not doing this for me - im doing it for my kids :-) i endured yrs and yrs of mother and toddler groups, tried to keep my head down and nit get involved qith the backbiting that invariably happens, all for my kids. i will keep up with the weekly meets (some really nice women and there was actually a dad other than dh there) as my son will need to find friends through other circles now. i say that, but in reality at school he has 3 friends only, that he plays with at school regularly. never outside school. dont want him feeling isolated. although i did notice again he either plays on his own or relies heavily on his little brother. hoping this changes in time.
    blondie- thank you. you brought a tear to my eyes. i dont feel that brilliant about all this tbh. i feel tremendous guilt for making him stay so long where he was suffering (didnt know home ed existed). i feel overawed by the sheer enormity of what i have done and im terrified i will ultimately get it wrong and his future will be compromised severely because of the direct decision i have made. yes he said he wanted to stay home and learn at home. but ultimately its down to me.
    and usually i am a conformist. i dont break the law, i dont go against the grain, i dont do anything too confrontational. this is so far out my comfort zone, its unreal. i am a control freak :-/ and am finding it hard to be 'child led'. but for now, at least, thats the way it has to be. will try to implement structure when i think hes ready for it. but, i will sit down and ask him to help me to do a 'timetable'. wont stick to it rigidly, but merely use it as a guideline.
    the icy stares from the parents/teachers is a bit hard to swallow as well. guess ive just got to suck it up. be polite. hope the storm passes.
    if it doesnt, i have no qualms in pulling J out, but once A has settled into a routine. get my head around 1 child being self taught, before i try and work out what J needs.
    i did get told today by 1 of the mum's that A looks very chilled out already. she would have said he'd been home 3-4 wks not 2 days. so that makes me worry that he was settling in school and ive read too much into what hes told me. argh!
    i dont feel like a good mum tbf. i feel i dont know what i feel. Am i paranoid and neurotic and have been manipulated like his previous teacher said?
    i dont know
    so try to sleep tonight and see what tom brings at the next meet!
    maybe my confidence will grow in time - here's hoping!