* Author Topic: Anyone using donor sperm part 77  (Read 101103 times)

0 Members

Offline K jade

  • Gold Member
  • *****
  • Infertility veteran since 2011! BFN princess :)
modify
Anyone using donor sperm part 77
« Reply #100 on: 9/05/16, 14:39 »
Oh gosh MrsE  MIL does need to pipe down.
The tesco checkouts of all places!
I know people only want to take an interest but gosh. How inappropriate.

Something funnyÖ my predictive text on my phone clearly likes the work DONOR a bit too much as it has been used rather a lot.
Even more than the word Dog!
So I text my friend yesterday telling her what a lovely weekend DH and I had by the river, throwing sticks and watching the DONOR  swim in and out of the water chasing them!!
Arrggghhhhh defiantly not something I would like to do

Beattie good luck on this 2ww my love!

Well Iím counting down the days till I can cycle again , hopefully June/July so not long (says my optimistic self). Lets hope it goes quick. Iím secretly hoping that ill get a call before long saying it has taken much quicker than expected. !

FertilityFriends

  • Advertisement
  • ***

    Offline MrsE1982

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #101 on: 9/05/16, 15:50 »
    Lol Kjade....predictive text has some good ones when it comes to IF! Try to enjoy the time - go and get drunk. I did the other weekend (didn't take long as I had been teetotal for a while = cheap date!)

    Yep MIL nearly had another go yesterday at BILs house as we all went round for BBQ. I'd told BIL and SIL when we arrived quietly that had started AF so it would be another 4 weeks at least till I start injecting and therefore he can plan his life again! Rest of family arrive for BBQ - who know but wouldn't dream of chatting about it over a sausage. And also some friends arrive - who have no idea, I'm not that close to them really. So as you can imagine a mixed crowd!

    So I'm enjoying the sunshine, thinking how weird it is that the bio father of our child is chilling out BBQ'ing away and MIL pipes up again about how next year we could be doing this with more kids knocking around. And wondering what they will look like.....Given that all the kids in hubby and BILs family look the same - I think we are onto a pretty safe bet. Even if we weren't mixing up the whole uncle/donor thing!!

    Hubby had left by this point to go to work....I just walked away and SIL dealt with her....!

    Offline K jade

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    • Infertility veteran since 2011! BFN princess :)
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #102 on: 10/05/16, 12:20 »
    LOL! MrsE that did make me chuckle!
    generally I don't really like BBqs but I must say yours sounds very entertaining indeed!


    Offline MrsE1982

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #103 on: 10/05/16, 14:45 »
    OMG I am soooooo annoyed. Had a letter from the NHS saying they are referring our funding request to a panel, which we have missed the May one will be held on 9th June. So this means that we can't get funding for IVF/ICSI approved until at earliest end of June. When I will be 34.

    The reasons for this are because we haven't followed the traditional 'pathway of 6 IUI' and it is 'outside of process' to do anything else.

    So I can carry on with another 4 IUIs with minimal success rate (more than right now anyway) and waste as much NHS cash as possible whilst they sit on their bums and decide if we can have the funding or not.

    I'm sorry we don't have sperm to try naturally NHS.....I'm sorry that we have chosen a donor that is not ideal for IUI, but you know what can we do!? FFS I am really annoyed and am trying to work out who to complain to!

    Clinic have been really good and don't get it either. They are going to try and talk to the NHS and see whats going on, if all else fails then they will get me an IUI protocol written up - as then I'm not wasting anymore time and have some sort of chance in between times.

    Offline Godiva

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #104 on: 10/05/16, 19:26 »
    MrsE: sounds like you are having a rough time. I could strangle MIL if she did that to me all those times, like it is not bad enough having to go for a donor in the first place and getting your head around it all... And then NHS misery... Hope clinic can sort things out, but nice they understand you do not want to continue to waste time.

    KJade: autocorrect can be very funny. I can just picture donor jumping in and out of the water to fetch sticks :-D . (I do not use autocorrect, partly for that reason)

    Beattie: how's things going? Going bonkers already?  ;)

    Offline Sapphire952

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #105 on: 10/05/16, 19:27 »
    MrsE - I hear your frustration.  NHS funding for donors is really frustrating, inconsistent and incoherent.  I didn't get any DS funded and they changed rules towards end of my treatment which would be meant that if I was a new patient who happened to need a donor, I'd have had no funding at all!! Absolutely disgraceful in my view. 

    Great that your clinic are on your side and can hopefully go into bat for you.  Daft as you say as you're acting on the Clinics recommendations and pursuing the most cost effective route... Keeping fx that you can resolve and potentially do a IUI in the meantime! Xx

    KJade - try and keep positive Hun, you will get there :) so many delays I know are so painful.  Try and focus on positive and fill your time doing things you wouldn't be able to if you were in treatment.  I feel your pain though xx

    All the talk about badly behaving MILs gets me thinking - we haven't told anyone we have used donor.  We wanted to wait until we were pregnant and then review the situation and timing about when we tell people - that way we would be giving people positive news (pregnancy) along with the sad news about how we'd had to get here.  Since we got pregnant we haven't really discussed, we've recently told parents but haven't mentioned it.  To be honest I'm happy with this arrangement for now, we are obviously v happy to be pregnant and in a way the donor but doesn't feel like it matters that much.  However, MIL had already been scrutinising the scan photo looking for my DH's likeliness which of course she is not going to find.  This makes me feel bad - feel like we are deceiving her.  I don't want to bring it up with DH at the moment as we are still taking one day at a time etc - I think it's one for discussion when we have a bit more time...

    Offline Godiva

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #106 on: 10/05/16, 19:35 »
    I have only had positive reactions from people who knew we went down donor route. More uncomfortable was one reaction from somebody who did not know (to DH): "oh, so you managed after all..." (Ouch! I know it was well meant, and he knew we had some difficulty as DH had infection after TESE - hard to hide when he was walking with legs far apart and in obvious pain. Even if they did not know what problem was, it was clear which area had been operated on...)

    Offline MrsE1982

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #107 on: 12/05/16, 10:04 »
    Sapphire - you will work out the best time and the best people to share news with. I am sure of it. You have plenty of time to decide a common front between you!

    MIL is now the least of my worries. I am battling the NHS BIG TIME

    So my clinic called and they are happy to do another IUI (some chance better than zero) but they think that the NHS funding may have been frozen for IUI. Because they have requested IVF/ICSI treatment. They are trying to find out if NHS will pay for another IUI at the moment!

    So because the doctor has said that IUI is unlikely to work and we should move to ICSI the NHS wont pay for any more IUI, yet because I havenít had 6 IUIs as per their 'process' I have to wait for a panel to decide on ICSI funding!!!

    Total madness!!! I am being denied treatment - I can just see the headline now!

    I have written a letter of complaint - but am just waiting to see what comes of this final twist in the tale before sending to my MP, my doctor, the PALS place and everyone else I can think of.

    Offline K jade

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    • Infertility veteran since 2011! BFN princess :)
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #108 on: 12/05/16, 14:35 »
    oh my gosh I have just typed a reply flipin twice and both times comp has crashed. this is my last attempt.

    MrsE that's terrible. how can they justify that kind of catch 22 situation? we prepare ourselves for the stress of fertility tx but these kind of delays make it 1000 times worse !!  >:( >:(
    I think you'll have to put this in writing now. and cite the emotional impact of it all. it is hard enough going through all this you should have the treatment you are entitled to, not have to worry about fighting your corner AS WELL.
    I know you said the panel sit in june but do you know roughly how long after that u can start?

    Offline K jade

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    • Infertility veteran since 2011! BFN princess :)
    modify
    Anyone using donor sperm part 77
    « Reply #109 on: 12/05/16, 14:38 »
    saph I wouldn't  worry and don't feel guilty. I doubt we will ever tell our in laws. they are in their 70s now and by the time the child comes to understand they may well  have passed on so not a lot of point really.


    well my cycles have completely messed up! last one 33 days. this one 22. what's going on? could the drugs still be in my system? i'm worrying I have menopause. again.
    my baseline scans always look good. so could there still be something sinister  going on?