* Author Topic: BFP Due Date January / February 2018  (Read 44703 times)

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Offline violin7

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« Reply #380 on: 14/11/17, 10:51 »
Evan ultimately it's your call but on a very small note - I had a myomectomy 2 years ago which is v similar to a c-section 'injury' but more complicated/serious. I asked my surgeon about the not driving for 6 weeks issue and he said that was based on info from years ago where c-sections were more rudimentary. He said to listen to my body and I think I was driving by 3 weeks, following lots of rehabiliative walking etc. Obvs it's only his opinion and my singular experience but I think it's worth looking into and asking your team. Esp if you are fearful of a 3rd deg tear.

Afm, nothing to report. Enjoying antenatal classes and nearly finished decorating.

One thing - at night I'm sufferering from really bad itchy skin over my legs and body esp at night. Anyone else got the same?

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    Offline hannahdaisy

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    « Reply #381 on: 14/11/17, 19:08 »
    Galapagos - I really hope things improve for you soon. It can't be nice to have all of these worries looming over you. You need the support.

    Evan - I would do a lot of research but as Violin says, I've heard that people are often feeling much more able to do things before the 6 weeks that we used to often hear. I've never given birth before, but also worried about how large they've estimated the baby to be and starting to worry about him getting stuck or distressed etc. Not a nice thought.

    Offline IzzyQ

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    « Reply #382 on: 14/11/17, 19:46 »
    Hi Evan, I had a c section for my first and everything went really well. There's something to be said for having everything planned and knowing what's going to happen...I was very calm going in for my CS. The recovery was quick - I had 3 days in hospital where the bars etc on the bed are very helpful when getting up, and you get lots of help with the baby. At home I rested a lot for a week and then made sure I went for a long walk every day. A few weeks later I was fine. If healing goes well you'll be able to drive earlier - I could probably have driven at 4 weeks but I had no need to as I was in London. I drove at 6 weeks.  You need to be able to do an emergency stop! Try not to worry too much if you end up with a CS, especially if it's what your OB advises after having assisted at thousands of births. Have you asked him for detailed reasons why he advises CS? Once you hear of his concerns you might agree with him! A third degree tear is deep. You could ask for a second opinion? But personally I wouldn't risk the incontinence! There is a lot of cultural pressure in the U.K. to have a VB with minimum drugs (NCT has a lot to answer for), and the result is often feeling like a failure if you don't achieve the ideal. If you can face that guilt beforehand and tell yourself it's best for your health to have a CS (as it is in my case), you'll sail through it. Almost every one of my friends has experienced horrendous births so I really don't feel like I'm missing out. Also once you hold that baby in your arms, it really doesn't matter how they came into the world! Xx

    Offline IzzyQ

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    « Reply #383 on: 14/11/17, 20:00 »
    Violin - have you tried magnesium supplements for the itching? Helps me a lot this time, I've found mg makes the itching milder. You probably know this, but it's worth mentioning the itching to your OB /midwife because of the risk of cholestasis xx

    Offline IzzyQ

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    « Reply #384 on: 14/11/17, 20:04 »
    On another topic... with all the talk recently about chemicals given off by foam, I decided to replace the Moses basket mattress with a wool one by Little Green Sheep. It seems very hard compared to the foam one, has anyone used Little Green Sheep mattresses before? Xx

    Offline violin7

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    « Reply #385 on: 14/11/17, 22:33 »
    I hadn't heard of magnesium helping, thanks Izzy  :)
    My partner has been on jaundice-watch - annoyingly I forgot to mention it at my mw appointment on Mon so will keep a check on it and bring it up at the next one x

    Offline Greyhoundgal

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    « Reply #386 on: 15/11/17, 12:10 »
    Izzy - I use little green sheep for my two....I think theyíre great  ;)

    Grey xx

    Offline Galapagos

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    « Reply #387 on: 16/11/17, 10:41 »
    Hi ladies, hope you are all doing super well,

    I have a horrible cough and cold and the midwife hasnít been able to phone me back about what is safe to take - any suggestions beyond honey and lemon? Iíve a full day of meetings and need to stop coughing 🙁

    To make matters worse too, Home is worse not better. Thanks for your messages, OH does suffer from depression and I know itís tough, but at some point I need to focus on just me and the baby rather than him. I canít even get the nursery started as he wonít help move the furniture thats in there out and I canít manage to do it on my own, and I feel too embarrassed to ask friends as they will ask why heís not helping me. Even considering hiring someone for a few hours to get it done! This just isnít how I imagined preparing for my first baby would be 🙁

    Sorry to unload on here, I just donít feel ready to admit to family etc how bad things are as once itís said it canít be unsaid, if you know what I mean.

    Xx

    Offline violin7

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    « Reply #388 on: 16/11/17, 17:52 »
    So sorry to hear this Galapagos. It's the last thing you need. Could you write him a letter? I know it sounds impersonal but could be a way to communicate your feelings. Or begin a conversation asking how you can help him, because you can't do this alone 
    Do you think he's struggling with the thought of being a dad? Hope you're ok.

    Offline lilacfairy

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    « Reply #389 on: 16/11/17, 17:57 »
    Galapagos, that sounds so difficult and I know what you mean about not wanting to tell family. When I was pregnant last year, my dh suddenly realised that he was not ready to give up his freedom and started going out for drinks 5 nights a week. We had arguments all the time and I felt very lonely as he was not engaging with the pregnancy at all. But how can you tell your family that their son in law and father of their grandchild is behaving like an idiot? Luckily I had friends I could speak to and he finally came round, shortly before I miscarried.
    However, depression is another ball game. Does he take medication or get counselling? It's not something that you as a partner can help him get out of, especially not right now, when you rightly realise that you have yourself and the baby to focus on. He should at least speak to his GP to see what his options are. Do you have any close friends who can keep a secret and can give you some emotional or practical support? You could also look for peer support groups for people with family members who have mental health problems. Check mental health charities or even speak to your own GP. It's never easy to deal with depression in a couple, and as much as you want to support him, it can be too much to handle for a partner at the best of times.