* Author Topic: Life with Beano  (Read 4736 times)

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Offline Michimoo

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Life with Beano
« Reply #10 on: 21/04/17, 18:44 »
My brothers baby has just been born and been rushed for an emergency operation on her bowel. They found that the bowel was swollen and twisted and have had to cut a large section out. Either side of this twist there was trauma to the small intestines so she has been given a colostomy bag for the next 3 months and is currently under observation in intensive care. I've just been to see her and I couldn't bring myself to touch her. Not that I didn't want to but because if anything happens to her I'd worry I'd done something. Yes I washed and sterilised the life out of my hands, but there's always that shade of doubt.
She was so tiny and looked so helpless. My heart goes out to my brother and his wife.
Oh and to top it all off they can't rule out cystic fibrosis!
Could this sh1tty stick do one please?

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    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #11 on: 2/05/17, 10:26 »
    My niece is out of intensive care but they still don't have a prognosis. I'm not sure if that's because they are not asking or because the Drs really don't have the answers. Each day is taken step by step. She's looking more like my brother by the minute.
    Why is it that Mothers carry the child for 9 months and then they come out looking like the Father anyway?

    Having DH home is driving me nuts already. He's getting grumpier by the day. Yesterday I'd had enough I started applying for full time corporate jobs online! I just need to get out of the house. He's now starting to penny pinch and scrutinise what I spend money on. However it's ok for him to go out and blow 120 on a new guitar! I bought a flipping mascara!
    So, if I have my own money then he can't dictate what I spend it on can he?
    Oh and since my brothers baby has been born he's now told me he doesn't want a baby as he thinks it's tempting fate! Wtf?
    Look like a new husband is on the cards too.

    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #12 on: 13/05/17, 15:00 »
    My niece has had her blood test results back and there is a genetic abnormality but they can't tell them what it is yet so they need to do more tests. I would be battering down the Drs doors by now. However my brother and his wife are very much head in the sand type people. The longer they don't know the better.
    I'm keeping well out of the politics as I know it's not my place and I'm sure to say the wrong thing.

    Talking about saying the wrong thing. That's what I seem to be doing every second at home. DH is constantly nagging, picking an argument or really grumpy. I'm literally treading on egg shells  right now.
    To be honest I'm getting totally sick of it.
    I know I've turned 40 and I'm certainly not the weight I once was, but I sometimes wonder if this is it! Is it normal to lose the fun in a relationship?
    I'm not an argumentative person and I'm finding we are more and more opposite on temperament as the days go by. I tried to talk to him this week and all I got was "you're over reacting, you take things the wrong way, you only hear what you want to hear. Which in the end I just said "ok!" I really couldn't be bothered to go round in circles as he just "doesn't get it!"
    I don't think anyone else would put up with his bad attitude. He's actually getting worse with age.
    Maybe I do need to return to work and start building a bit of an income for myself as I've been out of full time employment for so long trying to have a baby.
    I know I've joked about it in the past but I do think back to my previous acupuncturist. Yes he was very attractive and the same age as me, but he was so kind, supportive and caring. That's just his Personality.
    It wasn't just because I was paying him for a treatment that he listened. I'm friends with him on social media and I see how gushy he is about his wife. She is a lucky lady. It really does make me think.
    Anyway. I'm back in my acupuncturist course tomorrow for the whole day. So that should give me some breathing space.

    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #13 on: 26/05/17, 22:36 »
    Sad news. Now Niece is 100% confirmed Cystic Fibrosis. Apparently my brother carries the normal type and my sister in law is an very unusual type. They are both in shock as they hoped that there was something less serious. I have no words apart from questions right now.
    Maybe I carry the gene too?
    Is that why I've miscarriaged?
    Is that why all my IVF's failed?
    Has my body attacked every embryo because it's seen a faulty gene?
    Who knows?
    One things for sure. My niece is very sick and I can't emotionally attach to her.
    It's a confusing and sad day.

    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #14 on: 9/06/17, 08:45 »
    I've been losing weight and trying to get myself a bit fitter recently.
    I look in the mirror and I don't like what I see so I decided to do something about it.
    With DH now being home due to redundancy it has given me more freedom to go to fitness classes. Ironically he moaned about the fact I wasn't using my gym membership and now that I am, I don't really think he likes that either. I can't win!
    He's also a bear with a sore head these days and he's driving me up the wall. I knew living in different Countries worked for some reason. It was so I didn't have to deal with his grumpy mood swings.
    I'm very tempted to go back to full time work myself if he can't find anything. Then at least I can be "me" again and not have to rely/beg for money and then get 20 questions as to what I want it for first.
    This morning he has decided to blame me for a scratch on the car. Apparently it's my fault because it wasn't there when he drove it last. I need to,"look after things better!" WTF?
    I don't think he realises the resentment I'm feeling towards him at the moment. He literally blames me for everything and questions what I do.
    Why did you put that there?
    Where are the keys because you had them last?
    Haven't you done so & so yet?
    We haven't got any milk!
    You get the gist.
    Now before you say I should talk to him. I try, believe me.
    His answer, "I'm just saying!" & "stop taking things so personally."
    I know he's lost his job. I know we now don't have an income and I know we are about to return on holiday to a place where he should be working, but it's NOT my fault!
    Stop being a picky Dick!
     

    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #15 on: 27/07/17, 15:08 »
    I know I've been away for a while. Life has just had a lot of ups and down and my head has been in a whirlwind.
    With DH unfortunately loosing his job, this holiday was bye bye Athens. It's sad as Athens now holds a big part of my heart. Although Serum never got me pregnant, they helped me so much and became like family. As far as I'm concerned, Greece gave me Beano one way or the other. I just think their red wine is highly fertile as I was drinking it quite frequently when we were lucky enough to conceive!
    I am struggling with the last lost pregnancy. It doesn't help that 2 of the NCT ladies got pregnant at the same time and are now going on maternity leave. They are both also due just days either side of my due date which was the 30th September this year. That is a date that is looming near and I can't get out of my head.
    Oh well! When life give you lemons, make lemonade yeah?
    I have something to look forward to next month and thats the BROS concert at the O2.
    Yes I know! I'm showing my age. But Matt Goss was actually going to be my husband when I was 14. My whole room was plastered in posters, even the ceiling! Looking at Matt Goss these days, I still would like him to be my husband at 40! Hubba hubba.
    I will try and not be a screaming teenager again and be composed, singing their songs like the old days.
    Pah! Who am I kidding?
    My friend will have to stop me from throwing my knickers on stage.

    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #16 on: 31/07/17, 17:40 »
    I've been trying to get my act together to write this flipping book. ........ It's amazing the motivation I get when I may be returning to work!
    The apprehension and worry I felt after beano was born and I guess also during my pregnancy has been very apparent by reading things back. The medical professionals really didn't help with my anxiety did they?
    Looking back I do think that maybe they should've spotted my turmoil and maybe offered me some counselling or something. Is it normal to be THAT on edge all the time?
    I'd like to think if I was blessed again that I may enjoy the next pregnancy and be a bit more relaxed about things. But do us ladies who've been through infertility ever relax? Hmmmm I wonder. I think that maybe I'll always feel like things aren't on my side as every failed pregnancy so far I've not got attached deliberately. It's just called self preservation isn't it ladies?

    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #17 on: 2/08/17, 08:02 »
    A few hours spent writing my book yesterday. It's amazing how angry I'm becoming as I'm reliving things. I'm only on IVF number 2 and about to get to the horrible consultant who told me to go for Donor Eggs after my failed cycle. This is going to bubble feelings to the surface that I'd but to bed.

    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #18 on: 15/08/17, 18:00 »
    I think I've decided that the best way to deal with DH is to just nod and agree, don't try and dispute anything he says and just live alongside him in the house like flat mates!

    Offline Michimoo

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    « Reply #19 on: 22/08/17, 17:30 »
    DH has his court case on Thursday fighting for unfair dismissal. I'm hoping that he wins otherwise life in this household will be unbearable!