* Author Topic: BFP Due date September / October 2018  (Read 31809 times)

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Offline lillie16

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BFP Due date September / October 2018
« Reply #320 on: 17/06/18, 21:52 »
Hello everyone,

I'm new to this group but i have been on one of the other threads .. I had IVF in Prague and live in the US and thankfully got the positive in February.  I have not posted in this group before as i am very afraid to admit that I am expecting eventhough we have finally begun telling some of our friends and family. 

I guess i just want to know if there are other ladies out there who have gone thru this journey and also are very nervous to accept this happy news b/c of all we went thru to get here. Am i the only one who is scared that something can happen? That we're really never out of the woods until we are holding that baby in our arms, or really until it is 1 or 5 or 25 years old?  Some of my friends have given me very cute clothes that show off the bump and i just want to hide it from the world b/c i don't want them to know in case something G-d Forbid happens. 

The other thing is that everyone we have told is sooooo happy for us! Some have even cried happy tears for us! It just makes me feel like there is all the more pressure on me!  i don't want to let all these people down if something were to happen.

Anyway, I haven't read any of the other posts yet here, so if this isn't the right place for this question, i do apologize. But either way i wish you all the very best and thanks for listening! 

~L

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    Offline tarapt

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    « Reply #321 on: 17/06/18, 23:04 »
    Lillie welcome!  I think a lot of us find it hard to believe that our dreams are about to come true in a few short months.  I certainly feel I am in a very fortunate position after several years of unsuccessful ivf cycles.

    I hope you can start to feel like all will be ok and you enjoy the rest of your pregnancy.

    What is your due date?

    Do you know the sex?

    Offline Barlume

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    « Reply #322 on: 21/06/18, 14:52 »
    Hi Lillie,
    I am from another thread and just read your post in passing. I could have written it myself! I am 16 weeks and just allowing myself to believe it. Not as I want to but because I literally can't find any more excuses not to. All is going so well, after so many years of tribulation that all this happiness can't last, can it?
    The pressure went up since we started telling people. I was reluctant at first but, exactly like for you, we had such amazing reactions to our news. Family and friends are overjoyed and there have been tears. But then I got even more nervous knowing that if anything would go wrong, so many people would be sad too. I am glad all was still good yesterday at the scan and I have no reason to think there are problems.
    I am trying really really hard now to relax and enjoy it. Have been even allowed myself to look at baby clothes today! No, I am not talking about actually buying them, that's a step waaaaay too far ;D.

    All of the above to say you are not alone and I feel exactly like you. I am even wondering if I will relax for good once the babies will be in my arms or if I will turn in a super protective mama bear!

    Offline Neniel

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    « Reply #323 on: 21/06/18, 16:35 »
    hazyshade - I hope your 20 went well. Great that you feel baby more now :)

    tarapt - Hubby is back now. YAY!!! Sorry to hear that you have GD. Don't be upset, you haven't done anything wrong. I don't think the measurements are very accurate, that's at least what the ultrasound technician at the hospital said at my 20 week scan, as I asked her if she could tell me how big the 2 are now.

    Neniel - My sister and her husband, as well as my dad already said they would help us move. We're going to Germany tomorrow, as it is my niece's christening on Sunday and it will also be the first time I'll meet her. Can't wait to see her and also my little nephew again.
    Yes, Brexit is poop... Could you not get a French passport? We also want to make sure that the kids get their German passports as soon as possible.
    How exciting that the baby makes your belly move when kicking. That recently started for me too, it's weird but great.


    lillie - Welcome here :) I can understand you're nervous. I was/am too. I didn't let myself believe I really was pregnant until my 12 week scan and now I am 22 weeks and even though I can feel the babies move and kick it still doesn't feel real and I am still very anxious. I have to admit I do love my bump, though.

    AFM, DH is back :) :) :) It's so good to have him back and brought me some maternity/nursing clothes and loads of clothes for the babies. It's so cute how excited he is. He is desperate to feel them kick and they do a lot, but whenever he puts his hand on my belly they stop. I noticed that I need a lot more rest now. When he came back I ironed 5 shorts for him and I pretty much had to sit down for a bit after every one, as I felt dizzy. Also, when I go up the stairs at work I am out of breath when I arrive on the first floor, which is maybe 20 steps. But I love my bump. It's quite big now. I think I'll miss it when it's gone. I've also received confirmation that I do have obstetric cholestasis. The itching is back and is driving me mad, but the consultant suggested medication, which my GP is supposed to prescribe. I am seeing her today. The consultant said as well that because if this the babies may have to be delivered earlier, I don't know how early yet, though. I also think I have spd, I get really bad pains in my hops and around my pubic bone and sometimes need about 5 minutes to get up off a chair. I hope she can suggest something that helps with this as well.

    I hope you're all well.

    Offline expatmum2

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    « Reply #324 on: 26/06/18, 09:22 »
    Hello ladies,

    Finding I have less and less to report on here.  It's been a crazy busy month on all fronts and I'm really feeling exhausted. 

    Neniel - hope you're having a good time in Germany with the family.  Yes, getting French passports is something I intend to sort out on maternity leave.  Just a word about potential dual nationalities as it seems to affect a few of us on this thread - where you give birth can affect everything.  My French teacher had her children in the UK but got them French passports.  However, because her children were born in the UK, they were unable to pass on their French nationality to her grandchildren and she's gutted that her grandchildren will no longer be European as from next year.  My kids would be the same as they are born in France but have UK passports, but because I work for an international organisation and was recruited from the UK, they are allowed to pass on their UK nationality to their children if I fill in some papers (another thing I need to do because of course none of this was an issue before when we were all European!).  I know in Spain you can't have dual nationality - you have to choose between one or the other.  Again, if the baby was born in Spain, it wouldn't be able to pass on its UK nationality to its children.

    Barlume and Lillie - I told people very early on this pregnancy.  I lost a baby previously at 21 weeks (a real freak occurrence so don't let that worry you too...) and I went to pieces for about a year, was signed off work, left my husband, just utterly lost it.  I didn't talk about it, kind of hoped it would all go away and it was the worst thing I could do as it really came back and bit me on the ^Booty^ for ages after.  So this time, I was open from the start and whatever would be would be.  I know it's all a worry but try and take it one day at a time, enjoying the moment and keep the focus on you and your feelings because we're not responsible for everyone else's feelings and indeed don't even know what they think or feel.

    How are you doing now Tarapt?  Are you being monitored closely?  Do you think it's under control now?

    MmeG - presumably your OH is back now and sharing the workload in the house.  Hope you're feeling okay.  I'm getting swollen ankles too if I do too much.  It's bloody hot here too which isn't helping matters.  My midwife gave me some tablets for it, but rest is actually the best cure.

    How are you doing Hazy?  All okay with the scan?

    AFM, baby is now very active and I feel him at all times in the day, but mainly when I'm sat down or lying down.  After so much worry at the start, I'm finding it very comforting and reassuring.  Although he stops the minute his dad puts his hand on my belly to feel!  Other than that, I'm slightly worried about my pelvic floor - I think I might end up incontinent after this pregnancy :-) And having sex is getting pretty uncomfortable now too.  The joys of it all :-)  Does anyone want to hook up on social media by any chance?  If you're interested, PM me and I'll give you my details. 

    Love to you all xxx

    Offline hazyshade

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    « Reply #325 on: 29/06/18, 07:58 »
    Morning ladies, so sorry I've been AWOL these last 3 weeks. Ive been a bit distracted with work, family dos, and tiredness.

    Madame G, how are you doing? I love your description of Panda moving

    Tarapt, your 4d scan sounds amazing!

    Welcome lillie16, and congratulations! Im sure that a lot of the ladies here (myself included) can relate to tour trepidation of saying it out loud. It can feel risky, like its tempting fate. I know for me, I have been on that rollercoaster!! I found acupuncture helpful. Not only is the lady lovely, she normalised my feelings, and told me that a lot of ladies she sees are in denial until baby arrives. For me, for a long time I thought I looked overweight rather than pregnant. I didn't have morning sickness, and only a little bit of nausea. I wanted 'evidence' that something was still going along.

    Neniel, yay to DH being back. I'm sorry to read you have spd. I don't know much about it, but have heard it can be really uncomfortable. Will it affect you carrying on at work?

    Expatmum, I agree with your advice to lillie16 and Barlume. It's been tough at times to stay in the positive, but so worth it. And agree, we can't hold or carry responsibility for other people's emotions.
    RE pelvic floor, I ended up buying kegel balls after I sneezed and had a bit of an accident 🤦‍♀️😣 I use them most days, and not had an accident since, but think I'll be investing in some Tena Lady afterwards till down there shrinks back a bit. We really do get ALL the fun 😂


    AFM, I've made it to 24 weeks!! I'm seeing my midwife today 😊 can I ask you, will she give me my Mat B form?
    We had our anomaly scan 2 weeks ago, and all was fine. They measured arms and legs, which showed little one was average size. They did another test to see the likelihood of little one coming early- which was low. They've booked me I'm for 2 growth scans and want to monitor by blood pressure. I got a bit lost as to why, though. Something to do with a correlation between the two being an indicator of something (Not sure what), but the chances of it is 1 in 100 🤷‍♂️

    I'm picking up a baby car seat today that one of the ladies at work is getting rid of. Still haven't chosen a buggy or a cot-bed yet, but have those joys to come- along with sorting out a car that has back doors 🤦‍♀️
    DH has been feeling the little movements this week. In fact, he's srmi-asleep with his hand on my tummy now 😊❤ . Jellybean seems to be a morning person, much to DHs dismay. He works unsocial hours and doesn't really do mornings. I keep grabbing his hand while he's asleep to feel my tummy ❤ he wakes initially to feel it, then falls back asleep 😁
    How are you all managing in the weather? I've been struggling at work. The clinic rooms I've been allocated had no air, and so stuffy. I kicked one of the Consultant's out of his room one day it was that bad 😂

    Offline MadameG

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    « Reply #326 on: 29/06/18, 09:16 »
    Hazy go you with kicking the consultant out of his room  ;D Iíve got a massive fan at work which helps, but the air still feels so stuffy. All the windows are open at home, which keeps downstairs nice and cool thankfully, although doesnít help my hay fever! So glad that your 20 week scan went well. Are they thinking that your blood pressure could affect the growth? Much better to be monitored anyway plus you get to see little one again. Hopefully Jellybean will start getting their groove on for the rest of the day so your DH feels them more. Make sure your midwife gives your form out, mine forgot so I had to go back a couple of days later for it as it has to be handed over to work by 25 weeks generally. The midwife also has to sign your notes to say you have it too, so a bit of a pain to rearrange xxx

    Expatmum panda took a while to get used to DHís hand too but now kicks more! Anyone else though and Panda instantly stops moving. Theyíre very canny for tiny people :) hope youíre getting some rest in the heat still. DH is back but was away for work last weekend and will be away some of next week too, boo! Thatís good to know about the nationalities being passed down. I guess it makes sense as it becomes quite dilute, Iím only a quarter Indian from my Grandpa so it would be odd for me to have any nationality from that. I think Iíve forgotten how to have sex now as the last time was before EC  ;D xxxxx I have a fertility instagram - madameg.fertility is youíre on it?

    Neneil how is your dizziness? Have you had your iron levels rechecked? Iím now taking a liquid iron supplement as recommended by the midwife as I was getting really breathless with stairs, it seems to have made a difference so far. How did your consultant appointment go? The itching sounds tres pants to the max. I donít think Iím entitled to a French passport as I live in England. I will just queue - thatís what we were born to do here haha! Have you seen a physio for your spd? So lovely that your DH brought those clothes back xxx

    Lillie welcome to the group! I struggled really badly with anxiety earlier on, but it has eased since the anomaly scan. However every time I do something like buy an item/tell someone I have a scan/give my maternity forms in, it triggers it all over again. I feel like Iím in a constant battle to not jinx anything, which is completely irrational I know. I have been a bit better at enjoying it too as Iím conscious that this might be the only time I ever get to experience this, so Iím enjoying all the kicks and admiring my bump when I can. Even indulging all the clucking hens at work that are obsessed with my pregnancy, even though that makes me nervous too. The 24 weeks has felt like a big milestone too. Have you spoken to your midwife or gp about your anxiety? There are some pregnancy related services to help you work through it. Hope youíre doing well xxx

    Tarapt thanks for the info on the growth scans. My consultant has actually been doing those measurements for me since the late first trimester, so thatís good to know. How are you getting on with eating? Glad that page was helpful too. And did you get your second try at the 4d scan? I know that the standard estimated weights have a margin of error window of around 200g either side, so I wouldnít worry too much xxx

    Love to everyone else, itís quite quiet here at the mo xxx

    Afm Iím good, starting to get a lot bigger pretty fast, a colleague of mine thought I was due in July  :o Panda generally has a rave/swimming lessons/practices acrobatics most days, apart from the day before my scan when they did sod all, so off for monitoring we went again. All sounded fine though. Had a consultant scan on Tuesday and Panda is growing really well - the legs are now up to the 94th centile! And the head is on the 85th......eek. Weíve booked a 4d scan in at our ivf clinic for 28 weeks, pretty excited to see what little Panda looks like. Iím getting really tired, but the liquid iron has helped a little. Iíve only got 10 weeks left at work now - crazy! xxxxx


    Offline tarapt

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    « Reply #327 on: 29/06/18, 13:17 »
    Gosh we are all getting closer to meeting our bundles of joy...

    MadameG I'm glad you found the growth scan information useful.  I'm back on Tuesday for my 32 week scan, at 31 weeks.  The 4D scans are amazing.  I hope panda behaves and you get some good pictures.  I've got a video clip of baby putting his hand over his face as it to say "enough now". 
    10 weeks at work.  once you get to single figures it will start to fly by.

    Hazy, it's good you are getting extra monitoring.  gives you another opportunity to see baby.  could the blood pressure monitoring be to check you're not developing pre eclampsia?  I get blood pressure taken every time is see the midwife.  What a shame DH misses baby kicking.  It will happen more often though and throughout the day.  as soon as I stop baby starts drumming.

    Expatmum, I'm the same with movements.  it is lovely and I'll miss the wriggling when baby is wriggling in my arms.  have you seen feet coming out yet?  Very interesting information about the passports and nationality.  We decided quite early on that baby would be born in the UK.  The language barrier was just too much and it also appeared that in spain the blokes wait outside the maternity unit until the baby is born, then they get called in for 5-10 minutes and then they are back in the waiting room, the whole family is also there and then they go off to celebrate.  leaving mother and female relatives (mum/sister) in the hospital.

    Neniel, aren't baby clothes the cutest thing?  I'm not surprised you are tired,  you are growing 2 little people in there.  you need to take it easy and let DH iron his own shirts!   ;D
    I hope you had a nice time at the christening and you got to make a fuss of your niece and nephew and I hope the family made a fuss of you too.
    Did you get some medication off your GP?  had it helped with the itching?

    AFM we went back for round 2 of the 4d scan and got some really good pictures.  I'd share them, but I have no idea how to put a picture on here.  we also got a load of video clips. 
    I'm still monitoring my blood 4 times a day.  I have it under control, but I've had a couple of high fasting readings but I know that this was due to a huge Eton mess ice cream sundae and then last night I made some shortbread as one of the guys is leaving and I obviously had to check they were ok.  so sugar is definitely off the menu until baby is born.
    I have a raft of appointments on Tuesday at the hospital,  Scan then dietician then midwife then gestational diabetes specialist and then the consultant.  I'll be there for most of the day I expect.

    Hope everyone else is ok.
     

    Offline hazyshade

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    « Reply #328 on: 29/06/18, 16:10 »
    Thanks for the pointer about handing it in by 25wks. She gave it to me today, so must make sure I send it off this week!!

    Offline hazyshade

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    « Reply #329 on: 29/06/18, 18:52 »
    MadameG, I tried when I came in from work for DH to feel the little one. No joy, and he was so tired, he can't remember this morning. The Midwife said by 28 weeks they develop a pattern, so hopefully DH will feel it (and remember) soon 😊
    🤣 I was thinking the same too about sex. We've done it once since we got our BFP, and while I get a familiar itch, I mostly haven't got the energy. Plus judging how sore my hips are during yoga stretches, I'm not sure I'm up for much else at the mo 🤦‍♀️
    Crikey! Panda is growing amazingly! For Labour's sake, I hope head and shoulders stay slender 😉
    Wow, 10 weeks isn't long at all! It's incredible how quickly the time flies. I've just checked, and I've got 12 weeks left at work - that'll cheer me up after what felt like a pretty hectic day. Im about to have a snooze to recover, while hubby is out (and he returns to cook 😋 )


    Tarapt, yes you're right. When I saw my midwife this afternoon, she explained that it is to do with risk of pre-eclampsia. They said its not anything to worry about at this stage, it's a 1 in 100 chance, and I happened to flag up. I certainly won't scoff at the chance for extra check-in with the little ones.
    Your 4d scan sounds brilliant, and aww, you're little one knows when enough is enough- super cute 😊


    When I saw my midwife today, Jellybean gave the doppler a bit of a hefty kick. Little one didn't want to stay still too long for the heart to be heard for long, but we're definitely alive and kicking 😂