* Author Topic: BFP Due Date - May/June 2019  (Read 24197 times)

0 Members

Offline Aley

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
modify
BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
« Reply #20 on: 17/11/18, 05:44 »
Hi girls!

I was secretly following the early pregnancy thread but up till now I didnít have the courage to write anywhere.

I am 14 weeks and 2 days finally pregnant after 2 years of IVF and this pregnancy funny enough is a natural conception.
I had my 12 weeks scan 2 weeks ago and the NiPT test 3 weeks ago and was given the very low risk for the most common trisomies, deletion etc. We also found out the sex because surprises is not something we like My 20 weeks scan is booked already and thinking if to have another private one in between.
Here they wonít even see you at 16 weeks, youíre kinda left in the dark until 20 weeks and then wonít see the doctor until 26 weeks....talking about a long wait.

Anyway, thatís me. I hope everyone is well and enjoying the weekend ahead.

FertilityFriends

  • Advertisement
  • ***

    Offline mrscoyle

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #21 on: 17/11/18, 11:13 »
    Janeliot - By the sound of it, I would tell your work sooner rather than later, but obviously when your ready, although the dame thing could happen again if you don't tell them. I think with this being your 2nd pregnancy as well usually you show sooner. My belly is looking bigger now, but i don't were jeans, i wear dresses mainly so I don't have to much trouble hiding it until we announce.
    im sorry to hear that your family situation isn't great hun, I would maybe just keep my distance unless completely necessary, You don't need that negativity in your life! So sorry to hear about your mum. An your sister in law sounds like a nightmare, you didn't say why your DH had to hang up prematurely ... was she angry?  rude? upset?
    either way, i think they are acting terribly and I would personally keep them all at arms length! you should be happy and enjoy the pregnancy hun, please don't let them bring you down, you and DH enjoy it.  ^hugme^

    Aley - Lovely to hear from you hun, please to hear that you have found your courage and congratulations! Thats fab news about your scans and tests.
    And naturally after your IVF that is fantastic! Yes my 20w is January 8th but will have a private scan on the 16th Dec, i would advise it, i was not going to be able to wait till January! so long to wait! Thats annoying your not seen at 16 weeks, do you have a midwife? where about are you ?
    How have you been feeling? are you starting to show?

    Offline Aley

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #22 on: 18/11/18, 06:56 »
    Hey mrcoyle, thank you for the nice welcome.

    I am starting to show a little bit and canít really wear jeans since I was 9 weeks. I am very petite and normally a size 6 so I am wearing very loose clothes and stretchy pants for the moment and that goes fine. I donít want to go into maternity clothes yet.
    I live in Ireland and here youíre either consultant led or midwife led where you have less scans and less technology around you. I am going for the consultant led but because is public I wonít see the team until February when Iíll be a little over 25 weeks.
    I had my initial scan at 12 weeks and had a meeting with the midwife where she took my blood pressure and set up my file...will also see the gp in between.
    Itís not ideal but I know that if I ever have problems I can always come in and Iíll be seen. I worked with the team of doctors and midwifes just recently so I know them all and theyíve all been really caring and sweet with me.

    Just to mention about the dopplers since I read some discussions in the first posts.
    I was trained how to use them by consultants and senior doctors since I recently worked in obstetrics and I can tell you that sometimes at 16 weeks I couldnít find it, sometimes it took me ages at even later stages.  Also I noticed a lot of people (including gps and nurses!) confuse the babyís heart beat with the placental flow (that rushing flowing sound). Is tricky and for someone that doesnít know what the sounds are  like or how fast it should be it can be falsely reassuring. I had a long chat with the people that are caring for pregnant women for longer than Iíve been around and they all said a big no to the dopplers. If any issues you should always go to the hospital. The campaign for not using them is not there because of nothing. Food for thought. I wonít be buying one, obvs even though my partner would want one, I just canít deal with the panic if I donít find it or I think is too low/too high and Iíll end up in the hospital anyway.

    Hello to everyone else!

    Offline mrscoyle

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #23 on: 18/11/18, 11:55 »
    Aley - I c, is there anywhere you can book a private scan at all? If you wanted to?
    Yes I agree about the Doppler thing, my GP took ages to my find the heart beat and he knew how to it! Lol plus there is always someone you can call if you think anything is wrong.
    Thatís so good that you know all the staff! I bet thatís so much easier, so glad they are taking good care of you. X


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

    Offline Aley

    • Sr. Member
    • ****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #24 on: 18/11/18, 14:17 »
    Oh, I had lots of private scans so far...when I arrived at my 12 weeks scan and I said to the sonographer that this was my 5th she seemed a bit annoyed. Didnít understand why but didnít mind it as I got to see my little squidge again.
    I think people that donít go through fertility treatments or in general they donít have a hard time getting pregnant just donít get the anxiety that comes with such a special pregnancy.
    I booked one for 16 weeks. I have to say I am still scared everytime I go in for a scan but at the same time hating the wait until you have one on the public side.

    Question, how are you girls dealing with work? I said it to my work but to be honest they didnít seem impressed. Iím expected to work 24h calls on the top of the 9-5. Also having a long commute of over an hour. I said Iíll do a few and then ask my gp to sign me off night duty but I am so new to this that I donít know how theyíll take it, if I should expect problems or not.

    Offline mrscoyle

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #25 on: 18/11/18, 14:34 »
    Aley - yes I agree, I donít think that they understand at all what we have had to through, Iím surprised she was like that! I had 2 at the clinic and then the NHS one was my 3rd although I didnít say anything about how many I had I just wanted to see if that heartbeat was still there! It is so scary! Got 3 weeks till my 16w scan now!
    Your work sounds pretty full on! And your family comes first hun, sounds like you have the right idea about getting your GP to sign you off!
    You and baby comes first An your work sounds like they need to be making more effort.
    I own a shop in town, so being self employed I will leave as late as I can and return as early as I can. I plan on having baby in the shop with me. Lol x


    Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

    Offline HopefulKayte

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #26 on: 18/11/18, 20:02 »
    Hi everyone, hope everyone is having a good weekend.

    Jane, I'm so sorry for your difficult family situation. It is a hard time (both when expecting and at holidays) to feel family stress/sadness. In terms of your in-laws, I understand. I had to literally stop seeing mine when I was cycling. They were so uncaring and self-focused. The ridiculous thing is they both have mental health training but clearly don't use it whatsoever to assist and show love for their own family. I ended up seeing a therapist due to the huge stress of infertility and having a poor support system on both sides of our family. It was very helpful, and hard to handle the truth, but my therapist felt that the treatment and lack of emotional/compassion ability, was going to continue tearing me apart, and that I couldn't change these people. I still keep my mother-in-law at quite a distance, and I refuse to text/email with her. So it also hurt to keep my distance but ultimately, I had less to keep me up at night, making me mad/sad. It has really made me set goals for the type of mother I want to be, and what I would do and prioritize for my children. Maybe that's a takeaway to focus on, how fortunate your child will be to have such caring and aware parents.

    In terms of telling work, while in Canada they do a terrible job supporting infertility patients (zero health care coverage for any cycles/meds), they offer a one year maternity leave to anyone who pays into this benefit via their income and if they have worked enough hours. Some self-employed people are able to purchase their own benefits package they can pay into but I understand this doesn't work for everyone. So for me there is the job security that you are entitled to the year (or less, if you choose) and your job must be there when you return, unless the company goes under. So in my field, we just tell whenever we want to, and I think you need to give one month's notice to your employer, in order to hire for your position. I'm sure most people tell earlier. With my son, some people guessed around 18 weeks, so the word got out. At that point, I told my boss (former boss now) so he would hear it from me first and not others.

    I'm currently on a medical need due to being high-risk and very ill, its been two months now, and I never even told my boss why. My doctor just filled in the paperwork for human resources. I had my husband call my employer as I was unable to, but as we thought we were in the middle of a long-term miscarriage, he didn't even say the details. I figure next week at 16 weeks when I get updated paperwork, I feel kinda obligated to explain where I went and why. He knows I had a miscarriage just before Christmas and was in hospital for that reason, and that it has happened before, so hopefully will be happy for me.

    It is really interesting reading about the different kinds of health care, scans, etc. Here midwives aren't respected as they should be, and as I know they are in some countries overseas. They give outstanding and far more frequent care, though, both before and after birth. Last time I chose to have a midwife as I was a little traumatized and worried from infertility, and preferred the extra attention and communication. However, I also became very ill last time and my workplace didn't accept paperwork from a midwife - only a physican or obstetrician-gynecologist. So while I loved my midwife, I thought if I am ever so fortunate to have another child, I will need to be in the care of a professional whom my workplace recognizes their credentials. So, I have being seeing my family doctor regularly prior to the cycle overseas (they got me my meds and arranged for my ultrasound), and since pregnancy (weekly appointments and scans due to my situation) and they will continue to see me until about 23 weeks, when the OB-GYN I am assigned to starts seeing me. It seems like such a long time, but they are actually seeing me a few weeks earlier than most patients.

    Love hearing everyone's updates... talk to you tomorrow ;) heehee!

    Offline HopefulKayte

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #27 on: 19/11/18, 21:23 »
    How was everybody's Monday? How is everyone feeling? Has anyone purchased anything yet or taking your time?

    Sorry for my monster message yesterday. I'm not always feeling great looking at screens so I guess when I update I write a novel. Today I had my first dr. appt. in a month and he said I'm already 16 weeks. He went by the first ultrasound (for me was 6 weeks 2 days) which he said is the most accurate. I finally felt OK talking about my duedate out loud, he said it was May 6 going by that first ultrasound. Although with a planned C-section I'm thinking I will actually be end of April. My blood pressure surprised me by being super low, but they said that was due to dehydration and lack of eating. My weight has gone done each appointment since I was there in the summer starting the cycle - for me as long as the baby is okay, I am okay not gaining early weight as I gained so much the past 5 years of cycles, I figure the baby might be living off my fat stores ;) If I become violently ill again, he said to go to the hospital and ask for IV hydration. But I am eating sparingly and not taking any food risks, so I hope it won't happen again.

    I have two appts. in December to keep on track of the weight loss/gain and hydration. I set my 18.5 week u/s for first week of December! Today is the first day I may have actually felt a little joy and excitement - looking on the other side of things a wee bit :)

    Hope everyone is keeping well :)

    Offline Bossy

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #28 on: 20/11/18, 11:47 »
    Helllllooooooo my lovelies,

    I cannot believe I'm posting on the due date thread!!! I almost lost all hope that I would ever get here and it feels like a dream! I'm so incredible happy to be able to join you!

    Today is one of the best days of my life and I honestly don't remember last time I was this happy! I forgot how it feels!
    Sooooo,  I got a call this morning and all the Harmony results came back at low risk and we're having a little boooooy 🤭🤭💙

    Lots of love to everyone xx

    Offline mrscoyle

    • Gold Member
    • *****
    modify
    BFP Due Date - May/June 2019
    « Reply #29 on: 20/11/18, 12:51 »
    hopefulkayte -  Don't apologise for your monster message! I am usually the culprit so it makes a nice change a sometimes it just turns into one! lol thats very interesting and sad that midwifes are not so respected there! I am shocked! i think its terrible, they are basically baby and birth specialist thats all they do! and yet a Dr has to do a million other things! It makes no sense to me people are so ignorant about things they don't understand!
    Anyway I am glad to hear you have sorted something out and are being taken care off.
    How exciting 16 weeks thats fab! and a lovely due date! Glad to hear you are bing risk free with your food hope all is better now.
    Thats great that you are now feeling a little more relaxed, I think i will feel the same after my 16w scan in December as well.
    I have got a pregnancy pillow which is super comfy and helping me sleep, and I am eyeing up a Christmas jumper that says
    "Making my little Pudding" an it has a christmas pudding on the front! its so cute! I am reluctant to bye it now but i am watching it online and need o bid, seen a couple but think i will need to get it before the 16th Dec really! I will want to wear it the day after! lol
    have you bought anything?

    Bossy - YAY Welcome! Amazing feeling isn't it!  :) I feel the same even now! lol so glad all your results where good and that you will be having a little boy! how exciting!

    AFM - I got my thyroid results today and was told it is 0.05 so phew! I am relieved its still lovely and low, I was told that its on a repeat prescription and I just need to go collect a new prescription for the next 6 months. So thats a relief! I'm so pleased.
    After having my blood test on Tuesday last week to check for downs etc and being told that if i am high risk they will ring me in a few days but if low risk they will send me a letter in a couple of weeks, I have been so scared whenever the phone rings! and I am aware that it was sent out late i think so although its been a week now I am still concerned that I might get a call!