* Author Topic: BFP - Due Date September/October 2019  (Read 14274 times)

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Offline StayPositive1

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BFP - Due Date September/October 2019
« Reply #110 on: 2/04/19, 22:04 »
Hi ladies , sounds like everyone is doing well which is great.

I didnít have many symptoms full stop and still donít so I canít comment on when they improved , I feel quick lucky about this ! Maybe my time is yet to come !  Oh apart from a lot of gas and bloat at the moment.

My first meeting with my midwife felt all over the place. She seemed very unorganised. We asked her about foods that I was unsure if I could eat mainly.

I did have a scan today - my last at the IVF clinic. Baby is one day ahead , heart rate of 164 and was wiggling around. Godiva your scan seems a lot more thorough than mine , mine was in and out with the CRL measurement and heart rate. So hopefully on my next one they will check everything.

Iím so relieved again that everything is going well. Told a few more friends and family today. Eeeek itís becoming real ! This might actually work !! Although .... trying to remain calm and not get too excited....

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    Offline K jade

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    « Reply #111 on: 3/04/19, 11:14 »
    Godiva congrats on your 12 wk scan.

    Thank u all 4 the advice on telling people. In the end DP just blurted it out on the phone to his parents so the cats out the bag now. They are very excited. Think its given them a new lease of life.

    Im 14 wks today. Seem to have this small bump since about 10 wks but it doesn't really seem to be going anywhere  :-\. Then when i breathe in its hardly there at all.

    Seem to be having a few wobbles too despite having tried relentlessly for a baby for most of my adult life. Im now worried that i won't bond and will want to 'give it back'.
    For so long babies have evoked negative feelings in me (jealously, bitterness) that it kind of went to such a point that i almost felt that im not even sure i like them anymore .. now im worried that feeling is going to stick around.
    Sorry bit of an offload there

    On a lighter note im currently living in a bombsite as dp and I bought our house last July in poor condition to do up slowly.
    Can i use water based emulsion paint? Worried this house is never gonna get finished
    Xx


    Offline Wishing4miracles

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    « Reply #112 on: 3/04/19, 14:23 »
    @IvyStar, thanks for mentioning the app, Ive downloaded it and spent a fair while browsing, theres loads to read in there :)

    @firefly, thanks for the groupon heads up, usually im a devil at saving money, but clearly baby brain didnt think to check for scan offers, Im in the east midlands, I had a look but the local offers were for later scans 16w+, however I browsed the companies webites and found one that offers a 3 scan package, reassurance scan whenever you want, gender scan and HD scan late in pregnancy, and you get all pic & movies on a usb stick to share with family and friends and a teddy with babies heartbeat, so caved in and went for that, reassurance scan is this saturday.

    Had booking apt today, for some reason they thought I was due a month later, so panic stations, they are trying to get me an urgent scan apt in the next 2 weeks,
    A nugget of info worth knowing for UK ladies, last oct nhs starting rolling out nipts, so if following 12 week scan it comes back high risk, you are sent for a nipt instead of invasive screening and midwife confirmed this is available in my area so really pleased as we had decided on a provate nipt if 12w scan shows high risk, so now the money can be used towards baby things instead. Also for uk ladies there are various baby shows throughout the year where you can buy things discounted so worth looking at whats happening in your area.

    Im on consultant led care due to icsi and im on aspirin.

    I cant tell you how excited I am about saturday, I will have so much sweet stuff to encourage baby to move, i might need to go on a diet after lol jokes aside everyones 12w scans going well is giving me some hope that it will be good news on saturday.

    @K jade, look for voc free paints and then you should be fine to paint away, what is voc?: Paints and finishes release low level toxic emissions into the air for years after application. The source of these toxins is a variety of volatile organic compounds (VOCs) which, until recently, were essential to the performance of the paint.

    Offline firefly37

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    « Reply #113 on: 3/04/19, 14:41 »
    Hey lovelies,

    StayPos - Yay on your scan! Great heartrate ...  ;D its so amazing to see them wigging isnt it!  Mine was pushing itself up with arms and legs going everywhere!  I am sitting here thinking ... how can I have that tiny little life inside and I cant feel anything and obvs not showing yet.

    Kjade - you sound like me the first time round!  We were living in a bombsite new house with no kitchen, desperately trying to get it all done before our DS came along.  BUT .... you must relax and you must stay MINDFUL (if you dont practice meditation and mindfulness then maybe start) ... I wanted my first DS so much but I was convinced he was going to die.  My anxiety went through the roof, I frequently ended up at hospital with worries on movements, I was worried that I wouldnt bond, I convinced myself that I had gone against nature, I stopped sleeping, stopped eating ... at 36 weeks I developed stress induced tinnitus.  This sent me crazy and led to my son being delivered 3 weeks early by c section.  I then ended up in a mother and baby mental health unit with very severe post natal illness.  Sorry to bring the mood down!!  But my point is ... you must look after yourself in this pregnancy and your mental health.  I hid mine and ended up severely ill.  My recovery has been due to an amazing anti depressant and MINDFULNESS.  I now mentally feel so much stronger for this pregnancy and a lot more positive.  If your wobbles continue TELL YOUR GP/MIDWIFE and they can put things in place to help you stay strong and mentally healthy. xx

    Offline firefly37

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    « Reply #114 on: 3/04/19, 15:08 »
    Oh and on the bump ... I had nothing until 16 weeks when it literally appeared overnight!!  Apparently you show earlier on the second ... but I am 11 weeks today and nothing other than the usual fat! x

    Offline K jade

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    « Reply #115 on: 3/04/19, 16:24 »
    Wishing thanks ill look out 4 VOC free paint that sounds ideal

    Firefly thank u for sharing your story, u must be so strong 2 go through all of that. Do u mind me asking what anti depressant you take? Ive had medication in the past and it helped but i came off it as was taking so many drugs anyway  for ivf and couldn't keep track of what i was swallowing.
    Meditation/mindful stuff i could probably do with giving another go yes.
    Ive suffered with depression most of my life and feel better when i remind myself its a condition and lots of people have it
    X

    Offline firefly37

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    « Reply #116 on: 3/04/19, 16:46 »
    K Jade - It was honestly the worst time of my life.  I had never experienced depression before, I cannot believe how debiliating it is and with the horrendous tinnitus I was hearing constantly, I didnt know how I could continue.  I was initially given Mirtazapine as this is an anti depressant with a very strong sleep inducing effect ... OMG ... after having insomnia for a good few weeks, taking this knocked me out within 20 minutes for 12 to 14 hours solid.  Downside was I missed all the night time feeds for my DS when he was tiny.  But although the mirtazapine helped to "level" me a bit, I still felt rubbish.  So i was changed to Venlafaxine which literally kicked my butt after a couple of months.  I still take it now and have been told not to come off now I am pregnant.  It took me around 16 months from the birth of my DS to recover from my episode.  Tinnitus is an ongoing thing, but I have been under a UK specialist to understand the condition which is mainly managed with mindfulness - its not really too much of an issue anymore and it should just continue to get easier as your brain adapts (its a natural noise, its just an auditory filtering issue due to stress and it needs to go back to being filtered).  My friends and family want me to write a book on my illness and recovery as honestly it was one hell of a rollercoaster!!  And I said i would never get pregnant again!! lol.

    Just look after yourself, your midwife will likely tell you that if you have had previous depression, you are more prone to it in pregnancy so do not be scared to get help and do not be scared to take medication!  Most of them are absolutely safe, they wouldnt prescribe them if they werent.  I am also straight back under the perinatal mental health team who will monitor me regularly in this pregnancy, again if you are offered this then take it!! xx

    Offline IvyStar

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    « Reply #117 on: 3/04/19, 20:02 »
    Hi Everyone,

    Stayp- great news on your scan. Shame about the midwife though. If you feel like sheís working out for you just ask to be changed to another. I had a terrible midwife first time round and she was so scatty and made loads of silly errors! Apparently she got the sack after people complained about her!

    Kjade- my bump was teeny tiny until about 24 weeks. I obsessed over my bump size and people commenting on how small I was really upset me. My DD was born exactly on due date at 6lbs 12oz and completely healthy. Honestly it will appear so try not to worry or listen to peopleís comments that they feel is acceptable to say to you.
    As for your wobble. Itís totally normal. I havenít had depression but felt terribly low in mood after I found out about bfp until about 12 weeks. I mentioned to the midwife and she said to keep an eye on it. I told her that I was feeling anxious and worried about this pregnancy and she was really supportive. I would definitely speak to your midwife and never feel ashamed. You have been through more than most people have to go through to have a baby. I also convinced myself that I didnít want a baby but that was me being defensive because of the troubles we had.



    Offline IvyStar

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    « Reply #118 on: 3/04/19, 20:09 »
    Wishing - it will be lovely for you to have your scan. It definitely helps to reassure and totally worth the money! How far along are you? Also what is nipct? Iíve never heard of that. Hope you get the house sorted too! We painted some rooms but I just made sure I stayed away from the particular room and left all the windows open. X

    Firefly- wow you have been through a lot! Well done for getting through it and being brave enough to talk about it. Hopefully this time things will be different for you and you will get all the help you need x

    Offline Godiva

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    « Reply #119 on: 3/04/19, 21:47 »
    Firefly: many peopke go on to have a normal post-partum after having had post-partum depression in a previous pregnancy. Experience helos, and good support is essential.

    Kjade: there are wobbles and wobbles. Some wobbling is normal, for anyone. How can I be responsible for a mi'i-human? What will my baby be like as a teenager? Will they be angry at me because they exist? Will (s)he be upset about decisions I took when conceiving (and afterwards)?
    I certainly think being monitored by a (mental health care) professional you trust is a good thing, just to make sure tjings do not spiral out of control, but every new mum-to-be worries. (At a late stage in first preg I was convinced clinic had mixed up things, and I had visions of having to explain to OB and midwives how I came to have a beautiful black baby... Things worked out. Day care said tgey wondered whether no2 would have white hair like DD. I said I would bd surprised if it had dark hair...

    We are currently having a house renovated extremely thoroughly. Luckily we are not living there yet... . it still adds sole stress though.

    Where I live nipt is reimbursed for a large part. I still have to pay something like 8Ä. Nipt is non invasive pre-natal testing. They take blood from mum, and can extract foetal dna from it, thus having an idea of the chromosomes of baby. It is used to screen for things like down sd, with an abnormal number of chromosomes. It can have other names, eg Harmony test (depending on which lab does test).
    I was also tested for cmv: still negative . just hope dd does not pick it up in next few months.