* Author Topic: Would I be mad to try again?  (Read 589 times)

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Offline Londonwriter

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Would I be mad to try again?
« on: 16/12/19, 06:40 »
I'm currently 30 weeks pregnant with a DS#2 and am 40 years old at the end of this month. I breastfed DS#1 for a year and would like to do that again.

I have multiple health problems. I've got an undiagnosed autoimmune condition, which - untreated - took me off work for about four years. It was miraculously treated by Humira before I was due a first cycle of IVF and had a 'miracle' natural conception of DS#1 four months later. My pregnancy was uncomplicated except for the autoimmune symptoms (low-grade fevers, etc.) and I had a *lot* of IVIG, which - thankfully - my parents-in-law paid for. My birth was more complex as I had a shoulder dystocia, ventouse and forceps, although neither DS#1 nor I were harmed.

Second time around, I was 38 when I started immune treatment, after we'd tried naturally for a year. I didn't conceive within the first couple of months on immunes so we had IVF with PGS at the start of the year. I got 12 eggs, of which 7 were mature. All 7 got to blastocyst stage, 6 were tested and one was PGS normal. This has turned into (cross fingers, hopefully) DS#2.

Again, I had immune treatment during the pregnancy - this time, a combination of IVIG and intralipid. I've now developed insulin-dependent gestational diabetes, which is a real nuisance and puts me in a high-risk category. I've no risk factors except for age (and the severe autoimmune/inflammatory issues) - my diet is like a health-food advert, and I'm still cycling and doing Zumba/cardio weight classes at 30 weeks. Obviously, I may end up having early induction, a c-section or something else because of the shoulder dystocia and GD combination. I'm due to see an immunologist privately after I've given birth in the hope of getting some kind of long-term solution for the autoimmune problem.

DH and I have always wanted three kids and my mum would really love a little granddaughter. So, despite the fact DS#2 isn't born yet (and I'm crossing my fingers for the little fellow), I keep hoping he isn't the last pregnancy.

Not sure if anyone's been in my position of advancing age with medical problems, and whether - eventually - it becomes more trouble than it's worth trying, and it's just too risky for the DC (?) Am I crazy to try for a third after this one? I'm worried DS#1 has been neglected due to all the medical appointments and the immune flare I had towards the beginning of the pregnancy, which left me more tired than I'd want. I'm also worried about the implications for DS#2 of being gestated by - not only a mum with autoimmune disease - but who is also currently diabetic.

Any thoughts from someone who's been there? Or might be considering going there themselves?

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