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Me 44, DP 42, TTC 2013, 2 MCs, 2 failed IVF, currently donor egg IVF
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Hi,
I'm do glad you ok. Started to worry lol silly, isn't it?
My result was negative, unfortunately 😭 Was crying all day yesterday. Today is a new day. I am feeling better.
I need to book a follow up consultation with my DR. But I know what I want. I wanna do it again. I have 6 fertilised morula/blastocyst in the freezer. Can't wait to try it again. I want my rainbow baby too ☺

Did you work through the 2WW? I did and start to think I shouldn't.
Where about you in the UK? I'm in Wales.
 

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Age 38, ttc 3 years and no BFPs, 1st IVF cycle
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Discussion Starter · #22 ·
Oh I'm so sorry. Its such a hard process isn't it. Even though I feel grateful to have gotten this far I'm still checking for spotting every day and panicking at the slightest twinge.
With 6 fertilised eggs to use you still have such a fantastic chance. Unfortunately we didn't get any to freeze but I know if this doesn't work out I will be like you and ready to go again.

I left my job the same month I started IVF. It had become horribly stressful for other reasons, and I'd had 6 weeks of sick leave for stress, so in the end me and my husband decided it was better for me to leave even though money will be very tight for a while. I have to say I'm grateful for the opportunity to have been able to be at home throughout this, though I know plenty of women manage work and IVF together.
I'm in the UK by the way. Devon.
I hope your consultation is productive and you are able to start a new round as soon as possible. You'll get there I'm sure of ot. I hope I will too xxx
 

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Me 44, DP 42, TTC 2013, 2 MCs, 2 failed IVF, currently donor egg IVF
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39 Posts
Hi,

You're so lucky that you could leave your job, honestly I'll try and go off sick next time in TWW. Too much stress and lifting, stretching in my job role. I did have 2.5 weeks leave as well just like you for stress and anxiety. I had a breakdown on the shopfloor when I was a manager due to work and doing IVF. It did good to me, I had anxiety management counselling and was doing a self help course as well as did reflexology and started taking yoga classes.
Listen, just take every day as it comes now. Enjoy the time and do some self love, practise meditation or yoga. It does help me to relax and staying positive when I need to. Find a new hobby, don't Google every little sign, please. It might put an un necessary bug in your mind. Tiredness is a good sign as far as I remember from previous preggos- which didn't last. Some ladies are never get to experience all the signs through pregnancies- the lucky ones 😂. But it's early days still. Be happy until you start throwing up.

I'm putting together a list of supplements and remedies which will hopefully help next time with implantation and keeping that baby.
So far I've got the usuals as iron, folic acid, vit B6-C-E later on D as well, magnesium, selenium, zinc, evening primrose oil-only up til TWW, coenzyme Q10, L-arginine, alpha lipoic acid, bee propolis, Brasil nuts, pomegranate juice, raspberry leaf tea and pineapple-only at transfer day and 3 days after.
I cut out caffeine, alcohol and processed food so far, work on lowering the intake of sweetener- as I don't use sugar, try to eat more oily fish.
Did you follow any tell tale things or just took/taking the usual vitamins? Have you got any more recommendations?
Devon is beautiful. I almost moved to Exeter. Had an partner there, but didn't last and ended up in Wales.
I don't mind as I have no family over here, I'm from abroad, moved to the UK 14 years ago.
The hardest part is not having my Mum here in this difficult times...
 

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Age 38, ttc 3 years and no BFPs, 1st IVF cycle
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Discussion Starter · #24 ·
Thanks for your kind words. I think I have such a negative mindset due to the years of failure that I constantly feel worried by small things and sure its a sign this will fail, so paranoid about miscarriage and ectopic etc, but really trying to keep positive and enjoy this time.
I don't know how work is for you, but for me the decision to leave was entirely due to the effect it has had on my mental health and I would have left regardless of IVF or ttc. We had staff losses in lock down and as a consequence I was given extra duties and responsibilities far above my pay grade or expertise and expected to deal with them without support. I was having nausea and loose bowels every morning for over a year with the anxiety. I had some sessions with a counsellor from my IVF cline in this time, because my treatment had been delayed due to Covid. I mentioned that I felt awful because I was sure it was part of why I couldn't get pregnant naturally and she told me that there is absolutely no evidence that stress affects chance of conception. That women conceive in war zones and famines and that its just a reason to put more guilt and pressure on ourselves when we are ttc so best to try and forget that idea and just focus on my own wellbeing. That really stuck with me.
Additionally when I left the clinic after my embryo transfer the doctor didn't tell me to refrain from physical activity or anything. I asked about it as I was worried and her exact words were, 'perhaps don't jump out of any planes, but other than that you can carry on as normal' :LOL:. I guess I must have looked like someone who might jump out of a plane!? Anyway excersise is meant to be good to keep blood circulating it's just a case of what you feel able to do after the procedures and drugs etc.
Having said that I know how anxiety making it is in that 2ww and how much you want to try and do everything to give yourself the best possible chance. I was grateful for not being at work and the absence of that intense stress that I've been living with for the last year or so because it's what I needed to be OK in myself, but if I had a job that I enjoyed and felt OK in on a normal basis I'm not sure I would have taken time off or not. It's a really personal thing and if you think having that time to really focus on self care would help you get through the difficult wait then I would def take some time off on your next round. On the other hand you might find the distraction a blessing from the constant worrying lol its catch 22!
Honestly I would take time off its its caused you anxiety this time.
Regarding womb lining and implantation I don't have much advice or knowledge I looked into supplements before starting treatment but they were all focused on improving egg quality, so I've been taking Ubiquinol and a multivitamin called Impryl recommended by a friend. I've switched to a basic pregnancy vitamin for now but will be back on the others ASAP if I need to try again! For womb lining I've heard some of the things you already mentioned. Mainly foods that are supposed to boost estrogen levels. Oily fish, wholegrain etc. Sorry I can't be of more help with that one.
Did you manage to get an appointment. For your follow up appointment yet?
I live in a small village just 10 miles from Exeter. Where are you in Wales? Xxx
 

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Me 44, DP 42, TTC 2013, 2 MCs, 2 failed IVF, currently donor egg IVF
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Hi AdelaideABL,

Sorry, but work keeps me busy. Also not much happening here. My period came,of that's a News lol. Was expecting to be a bit stronger, due to the built up lining, but it was just a medium flow. I had my consultation with DR. No surprise,I'll start FET with my next period. They don't wanna change anything with the protocol, so same medications and also just one blastocyst to transfer. They don't suggest two.
I'll be writing more later, when I finished work. I literally sneaking this message into my break time.
 

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Me 44, DP 42, TTC 2013, 2 MCs, 2 failed IVF, currently donor egg IVF
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I'm back☺
My work went through similar issues due Covid, like yours. The workload is doubled if not tripled and more and more responsibility ended up on our shoulders as managers. I cried every week after going home from work and my partner noticed a change in me. I wasn't smiling anymore, was always tired and didn't want to go anywhere. I had stomach aches and felt like having a fever every time I went to work. Anxiety... that's what the doctor said.
So I made a decision after being off for 2.5weeks. I stepped down to a simple sales assistant. I do loose out on wage just before we wanna buy a house 🤷 but money is not everything. I feel better since. Work still not perfect but getting there. We lost 45% of our staff in the last 6 months. We're recruited a few since but still need about another five people to be 100% again. So I know what you went through, unfortunately. But I can't leave my job. Keep thinking of the mortgage application and the maternity. I work for the company for 7 years now, it will be stupid to quit now before I get pregnant.
I also had councelling while was off sick. And she told me basically the same. That I need to focus on myself and my wellbeing. Yo start open up to people about my feeling. I tend to bottle up, showing a mask then once just got to the top where I can't take it anymore.
My family's still live abroad and they don't know about my new IVF journey. So it's been very difficult to not being able to talk to anyone else, other than my partner and my best friend. I chose not to tell them until I can confirm a pregnancy. This is my way of protecting my parents of further disappointment. Just like as it proved now, that my first DE transfer wasn't successful. My Mum is sooooo want to be a grandparent, that I don't want to give them false hope and heartaches.
I do believe of not his year but next year I can finally give them a good news.
I know you're right about people getting pregnant in difficult circumstances but I feel I just want to know for sure that next time I won't feel guilty of working. I think I'll have some time off while waiting in the TWW. We do need to lift heavy stuff. A box of frozen goods or a create of bananas is around 12-15kg. Also there's a lot of stretching going on while lifting a ten pack of juices above my head. My doctor said after the transfer that no strenuous job or going into the big freezer, need to keep my tummy at body temperature, so can't hold a frozen box close to my belly either while carrying it. It's difficult. I guess if I would have some less physically intense job, I would still want to work, as you said to take my mind away of waiting.
I do some exercise at home plus doing yoga as well. Always been active. So I can't just sit on my ass for two weeks either lol.
I heard of Ubiquinol, it's like a Coenzyme Q10 supplement. I do take that as well. Can't hurt.
I live close to Cardiff, in Barry. Have you heard of Barry Island? It's very popular on summer. I only moved here just when the pandemic started in last march. My partner lives here. I lived in Bristol for 13 years beforehand.
How you feeling? A week gone by again. Do you have any new pregnancy symptoms? When is your scan? I'm so excited for you already 🤗
 

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Age 38, ttc 3 years and no BFPs, 1st IVF cycle
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Discussion Starter · #27 ·
Hi gamrguk,
Good to hear from you. Nice to hear you making plans for your next ivf round, though I totally understand not wanting to tell too many people. My mum is also desperate for a grandchild and I am her last hope. My brother and his wife went through 5 ivf rounds without success and they decided to take a break from it all, which I totally understand having experienced it for myself now! I did tell my mum about what I'm doing, as she lives very close by an dd would have been hard to keep it under wraps.
Sounds like a good idea for you to take a couple of weeks off for you tww next time. Especially if you're having to do heavy lifting. Only wondered if you spoke to your work about it whether they might be able to put you on lighter duties for a few weeks?
I have heard of Barry. Actually when we go to the coast around Minehead or Porlock we can see that part of Wales!
I've been feeling pretty worried since I got my positive test to be honest. I knew I would o_O
I don't have any obvious pregnancy symptoms. No breast tenderness, no sickness. I'm bloated from the progesterone pessaries but that's about all. To be honest in the last week or so I've felt less pregnant than before. Not even getting the sort of twinges and stretching feeling that happened in week 4/5. I know some times symptoms start a bit later, but I can't help but worry. I had a couple of very period like cramps over the weekend. They didn't last long but they freaked me out. I haven't had any bleeding or spotting, but since learning about missed miscarriages even that isn't giving me any reassurance. My scan is next Thursday and would be 7 weeks and 3 days. I want it to come round so badly but also terrified of bad news. This ivf/pregnancy lark really doesn't get any easier!!
 
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