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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi,

I was wondering whether anyone had anything similar happen and whether we should try and nip it in the bud now or just let it be.

J was quite poorly in December for the first time ever with a nasty flu bug, he woke up in the night and jumped into our bed, which was really sweet at first having him cuddle up with us, but now he gets in and takes up half the bed. ;D Some times he'll go to sleep when he comes in at 4am and other times he'll mess around at trying to get to sleep, then about 5am will start playing on DH's iPhone!

I don't really know what to do, as he was so well behaved until now with his sleeping, if you try and put him in his bed he starts sobbing like he's being tortured with various tales of monsters and gruffalos, if we leave him to it are we making a rod for our backs?

xx
 

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I have the same thing with M. Most nights she will sleep through in her own room in her own bed. She slept in her own cot in our room until this time last year but we moved and she's had her own room and big girl bed since then. She goes through phases when she will come into our room and want to sleep in our bed. We have a 1 year old who still sleeps in his cot in our room and I suspect sometimes she just wants to check he's not in our bed. Sometimes she will wake up needing a wee and then ask to go in my bed instead of her own, in which case I say no, but most of the time she will just crawl into our bed while we sleep.  If she does it as a one-off I let it go but when it happens on 2 or more consecutive nights I tell her that if she doesn't want her bedroom anymore then I'll get her a cot in our room and her lovely bedroom will become mummy's study. It's always done the trick. I've had stories of monsters etc. We had a huge problem with Beast from beauty and the beast and I just kept telling her that though he looked ugly he really was a sweety and a prince to boot! It eventually went away. She's never been scared of the gruffalo but I'd laugh it off saying the gruffalo is so silly he's scared of a little mouse or something along those lines.  We have now decided to move J's cot into her room this weekend. Goodness knows how that will go!!! :)
Hope this helps a little.
XXX
 

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If it becomes a real problem, i would just take him back to his own bed(such an effort at 4 in the morning i know!! ;D ) every time he does it, with minimal talk etc and eventually he should stop - M does it too sometimes.  Try to ignore the yelling - unless they are genuinely having nightmares, but a lot of it is to try to guilt you into letting them in with you!! I have a cut off of around 6am, anything before that she goes back but if i know it's not too far from morning then i let it go.  She knows if she is going to get away with it too and tries to make an effort to flap around a bit less!
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
At first it was a novelty as he's never done it before, usually if he comes in the room he's dances around till you're up and ready to get downstairs. Seeing him lie there playing with the iPhone is really cute, but having Angry Birds blasting down your ear at 5am not so.

DH has a lot more perseverance than me, he will stand outside his door whilst he throws a hissy fit and waits till he's calmed down. Generally with tantrums and things like that I can't stand him crying so I give in a lot earlier. You can tell he knows this as he'll come to me and whisper in my ear if he wants a biscuit or something like that.

I think it was Friday last week I was literally clinging onto dear life trying not to fall out of bed as DH decided he was going to have my half of the bed. Jack was lay there all sprawled out like a star fish. We invented Dave the friendly monster who combats all the nasty ones, now he's seen monsters inc too he's a bit more comfortable with the whole monster thing.

I rememer ages ago someone mentioning this clock you can buy for kids so they know when to get out of bed, what was that called?

xx
 

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MrsMaguire -it's the gro clock and amazon say they have it from £19.00 inc p&p at the moment. XXX
 

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You can get different types too - Mollie has a princess one now, and there is the 'rabbit' one, which mollie was scared to death of!! ;D  It sadly didn't work with her, but i know other people who swear by them.
 

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If you can find out the reason for him waking up, and for coming in, then you can stop it becoming a habit.  We have the same - on and off, M was always great in his own bed, then as he got older, started having nightmares, or getting anxious.... in he comes.    There's usually a reason, not feeling well, or really needing some comfort.  At the end of the summer holidays before school started he kept coming in to us.  Through Christmas he's not been well, so he's been in again.  I'm not really one to deny him the comfort until I think it's just habitual, then we get him to stop again.  We either sit in the room with him til he falls asleep to reassure him, or if it gets difficult, start a reward chart for that particular phase of wanting to come into us.

Recently we've been so exhausted with DD's sleep problems that I just haven't got the energy to tell him no, and if he gets really upset, he can wake her up when we've just got her back to sleep... so I let him get away with it.  He's not going to be doing it as a teenager, and what with DD always awake, it's not like he's disturbing our marital relations!  so hey, I'm fairly relaxed about it!  I have a rule though, if he's not going to go to sleep, he goes back to bed - he's not there to mess about.  That was one of the reasons I never had him in with us as a baby, because he wouldn't keep still.  Now he's a bit older, he does actually find it helps him go to sleep, so I think the comfort is a real factor.

It's utterly ironic as I didn't want DS in my bed when he was a baby, but now if he's upset or had a bad dream he can't wait to get into it - whereas when DD was a baby I actually chose to co-sleep with her and now she hates getting in with us!

I expect J will get over it.  Just do something to encourage him to stay in his own room for a bit, then he'll get back to his own bed. 

C x
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Hey,

I wish I'd read this last night before going to bed! J had been up twice before midnight thought nothing of it as he's a bit snuffly, DH has had some advice to keep putting him back. J was really playing up, I think the shortest he left it was 2 mins before opening his door and the longest about 8 mins from about 1am! But by 2am he was more or less wide awake, by that point DH just shrugged I was officially now on the night shift (yay me!) So I sat in J's room till about 3am and he was still awake, so hoped that going to our bed would be the magic cure. By 3:15am he was downstairs with me as I was in agony anyway.

He's gone off to school (well childrens house - they upgrade them at Montessori to go in with the big kids at 3) I'm guessing at some point he'll sit in the quiet corner and snooze, bless him. I've got important reports to get into work so no snoozing for me, so better boil the kettle and have some more extra strong coffee (which I was hoping to detox from today for tx - I don't think apple tea is going to cut it though : S)

Thanks again xx
 

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Hi

I hope J caught up on his sleep ?

DS has been the same on and off for a year  :eek:  He started waking in the night for the toilet but it was more or less every night, now he has a stronger bladder and doesn't wake for the loo as much but I think the waking has now become habitual for him as alot of the time he walks in our room says 'i just need a hug' and then will go off to his own bed if he's not allowed in with us.  Some of the time I wake up and just find him in with us  ::)

I've tried not comforting him (as i know he's not scared or anything) and sending him back with the no talking, but he's straight back out again and again.

I guess he will grow out of it and sometimes it's lovely having that extra cuddle in bed if its approaching morning but its the waking around 2am EVERY morning thats just so exhausting  ::)

No answers i'm afraid but you're not alone  ;)

xxx
 

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I've also had a problem with dds sleeping recently.

She was always a really good sleeper but the last few months she wakes up in the night.  She used to come in to my room - can't quite remember how but I've managed to stop that (I think I just used to put her back in bed) but she cry out for me and wants a cuddle.  It really started to get me down and I was exhausted.

I told her that if she kept waking me up I would be too tired/ill to play with her.  She certainly understands that if she wakes up in the night she must be quiet and go back to sleep.  I take her peppa pig torch away if she wakes me up and when she sleeps right through she gets a present and lots of praise and thanks.

Not sure why she wakes up- she normally goes quickly back to sleep but unfortunately I take longer.

Wonder if it's an age thing - she's 2 and a half!

X
 

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thank goodness for this thread. one of my twins has just started doing this too. Today started at 4.30am, not good. From reading your posts, it could be down to needing more reassurance as she's just started pre-school. Which I understand, but I'm getting so tired now...... have tried to bribe her with promise of stickers tomorrow if she sleeps until the 'wakey light' comes on- 6.30am, a positive lie-in!

Sal
 
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