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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
CINDERELLA wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let
her. As Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother
appears, and promised to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to
go to the ball, but only on two conditions.  "First, you must wear a
diaphragm." Cinderella agrees.  "What's the second condition?"
"You must be home by 2:00 A.M.  Any later, and your diaphragm will turn
into a pumpkin." Cinderella agrees to be home by 2:00 A.M.  The
appointed hour comes and goes, and Cinderella doesn't show up  Finally,
at 5:00 A.M.  Cinderella shows up, looking love struck and very
satisfied. "Where have you been?" demands the Fairy Godmother.  "Your
diaphragm was supposed to turn into a pumpkin three hours ago!!!"
" I met a prince, Fairy Godmother. He took care of everything."
The Fairy Godmother stated, "I know of no prince with that kind of
power!
Tell me his name!"
Cinderella replied, I can't remember, exactly, .
Peter, Peter, something or other..."
___________________________________________

PINOCCHIO had a human girlfriend who would sometimes complain about
splinters when they were having sex.  Pinocchio, therefore, went to
visit Gepetto to see if he could help.
Gepetto suggested he try a little sandpaper wherever indicated and
Pinocchio skipped away enlightened.
A couple weeks later, Gepetto saw Pinocchio bouncing happily through
town and asked him, "How's the girlfriend?"
Pinocchio replied, "Who needs a girlfriend?"
_____________________________________________

LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD was walking through the woods when suddenly the
Big Bad Wolf jumped out from behind a tree and, holding a sword to her
throat, said, "Red, I'm going to screw your brains out!"
To that, Little Red Riding Hood calmly reached into her picnic basket
and pulled out a ..44 magnum and pointed it at him and said, "No, you're
not.
You're going to eat me, just like it says in the book."
____________________________________________

MICKEY MOUSE and MINNIE MOUSE were in divorce court and the judge said
to Mickey, "You say here that your wife is crazy."
Mickey replied, "I didn't say she was crazy, I said she's f**king
Goofy."
___________________________________________
SNOW WHITE! saw Pinocchio walking through the woods so she ran up behind
him, knocked him flat on his back, and then sat on his face crying, "
Lie to me! Lie to me!"
___________________________________________

Did you know...Captain Hook died from jock itch.
____________________________________________

One day, JANE met TARZAN in the jungle.  She was very attracted to him
and during her questions about his life she asked him how he engaged in intercourse. "What's that?" he asked. She explained to him what sex was and
he said, "Oh, I use a hole in the trunk of a tree."
Horrified, she said, " Tarzan, you have it all wrong but I will show you
how to do it properly." She took off her clothes, lay down on the ground
and spread her legs.  "Here," she said, "you must put it in here."
Tarzan removed his loincloth, stepped closer and then gave her an
almighty kick in the crotch.  Jane rolled around in agony.  Eventually
she managed to gasp, "What the hell did you do that for?"
"Just checking for bees," said Tarzan.

:)
 

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dont get the Cinderella one ?

Mini xx
 

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i didn't get it either  :-\

glad it wasn't just me others very funny though,

Abby
 

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sssfo

thanks for the explaination never heard of Peter Peter Pumkin Eater though !  ;D

Mini xx
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
There's a nursery rhyme that goes
"Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater
Had a wife but couldn't keep her.
He put her in a pumpkin shell
And there he kept her very well."

This is one of Mother Goose Rhymes.... :)
 
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