Aah thank you Debs for the supportive post, really needed to hear that. It sounds like you've been through a lot too and am drawing strength from how you deal with things. The words the lady said really stung but was also thinking the country where she comes from they have children very young and I'm not kidding myself that I look in my 20s anymore. It's funny however that just one casual, off the cuff remark from a complete stranger has the power to hurt so much and also to make you re-evaluate your self image/ esteem. Keep wondering now when the next comment might be and am already thinking a way of pre-empting might be when meeting people initially to quickly slip into the conversation the words 'my daughter or my son' to avoid the prying questions. I'd never dream of asking others any personal questions esp when I barely know them and wouldn't even ask someone if they were the nanny when it is obvious they were for fear of causing offence so what gives others the right to be so flippant? It's fortunate your children resemble you. I did ask for the clinic to match my characteristics but it didn't seem to happen in reality. I went overseas and perhaps should have gone to a clinic in Spain or Greece where I could have got slightly darker complexioned donors although then of course wouldn't have had my beautiful children so no regrets. Although nobody has explicitly mentioned them not looking like me, if I think people are probing I'll just say they take after my partner's side. My son was a donor egg and my partner's sperm and my daughter a double donation, would have had her a little earlier but had to try 5 times! Do you plan to tell your children about the donor side? I've attempted to talk to my son a few times and think he takes it in at some level though he's still very young. Anyhow better start the day, thank you again and will keep a watch on this thread as nice to talk with others in a similar boat.