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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
DH received a phone call last week, 2 days after sperm retrival surgery, to be told they could not find any sperm. It broke my heart to see how upset he was and to loose our hopes of a child using his sperm. Some days are good and then others are bad. DH would prefer no-one knows results and therefore won't know if we use sperm donor, which is our next route. I am respecting his wish but I think I will find it hard as I would otherwise talk to my Mum about it all. Feel bad to be keeping information from her when both my parents have been aware of everything so far. We also don't agree, at present, on telling our possible child, if IUI using donor sperm works, how he/she was concieved.

I have read many messages about low sperm count etc but has anyone else been through the surgery to find there is no sperm at all. We haven't seeked any counselling yet but DH I think would like an answer as to his results. Don't know where to look first. Does anyone have any suggestions?
 

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Hi Katie

I am really sorry I don;t have any bright ideas - but I wanted to wish you both all the best in working your way through the minefield you appear to be in at the moment.

I do recommend counselling, it is a blow for you both. DH and I were fortunate in that we did not have the donor issues to consider but counselling helped us realise that we perhaps were not talking to each other in a way we could understand and no asking for what we actually needed from the other.

It may be worth taking a look or posting on the donor thread, if you haven't already. They maybe able to help with that side of things.

Take care

Clare
 

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hi katie

im sorry to hear about your dh ^Cuddle^ my dh has no sperm and we are using donor and no one knows and thats the way we want to have it i think its just not fair on dh to tell everyone we dont know about telling the child about how they were concieved but will talk about it more when it happens i want to wish you and dh all the best keep me posted how you are both doing

love always lilly xxx
 

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Katie,

I'm so sorry to hear your dh's sperm retrieval op proved unsuccessful - I can only begin to imagine how you must be feeling - just waiting for the results of my dh's op a few years back, worrying they may not find any sperm was bad enough. I knew at that point that if they didn't find sperm that my dh would not agree to going down the Donor route at all.

I do think you should encourage your dh to have some counselling with you and perhaps this may help you both iron out any differences of opinion or compromise on certain issues.

I'm sorry I have no wise words that can help you at this difficult time, but I do recommend you use this site to build up a network of support, to gain many friends, who will help you through the Infertility Rollercoaster ride.

My dh never wanted anyone to know that we were even having ICSI, in the end we compromised and I was able to confide in my best friend (who knew all along anyway as we'd always discussed most things) - but no one in our families had any idea. I found FF invaluable and gave me the strength to carry on even when things seemed that they'd never work out.

I wish you and your dh all the very very best.

Love,

Sue xxxxxxx
 

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Dear Katie and DH,

We are both really sorry to read about the lack of sperm after the retrieval. We have been thru the process twice and were very lucky each time. The Consultant didn't expect it to be a success and tried to put us off the idea.

However, even having the sperm has not resulted in a positive IVF result. We have had 2 failures now.

May we ask why a retrieval was needed in the first place? Ours was after a cancer operation and an undescended testicle as a child.

Did your other half have a TESE or a needle injected to try to get the sperm?

Can they try again in another area?

Sorry to ask these questions. When we were trying to work out our problems we found a really good flow chart on the internet which helped narrow it down.

Will try to find the link and post again.

With love from,
Flopsy and DH
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Dearest Flopsy & DH,
After DH's sperm counts were zero sperm retrieval was the next option if we wanted the most 'natural' pregnancy. When the surgeon asked what do you mean by 'most natural' we said, quite surprise he had to ask ???, that if it was possible to find DH sperm then we would like to go that route first. After blood tests and an examination they said his hormones were fine but testicles below average in size. Even on the day of surgery we were told there was a good chance of finding sperm. DH had surgery under general anaesthetic. They made an incision in both testicles. He was then stitched up and had to wear a scrotam support for several days. He was black and blue. Didn't help pain when he found out the results were negative.
Where else can they look? I've been trying to look up as much information as I can. They took a biopsy, not sure if this is something else we will get results of or whether that was what they have checked for sperm. It would be good (if you can call it that) to find out the reason. DH did have mumps when he was young. Apart from this he did used to have the odd drink binge before I knew him. I sometimes wonder if the new slightly healthier lifestyle he has may mean one day he might just start producing. It may be wishful thinking. If you can find the flow chart you found useful please let me know, thanks.
What's your next step?
I hope I answered your questions.
Lots of love and luck.
Katie xx
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Dear Clare, Lilly, Sue & Flopsy,

Many thanks for your words or support. This is the only place I can discuss it apart from with my DH.

DH is going to try and get some time off work to see counsellor. They are only available Wednesdays and Thursdays and at the moment he is working away during the week.

Best wishes to you all. ^fairydust^
Katie xxxx
 

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Katie

I am so sorry to read your news. You and dh must be devastated. Maybe some time out .

My dh had testicular cancer and it wasnt until after they ask us if we wanted to freeze sperm for later use that we found out he wasnt producing any sperm at all.

It is very hard to come to terms with. We went down the route of donor and were lucky after 2nd ivf attempt to be so blessed with our little boy Anthony.

We did receive loads and loads of councelling, which I actually found extremely helpful. We hoped a miracle would have happend ourselves but 6 years later we realised we needed ivf with donor.

PLease feel free to im if you want to know anything.

Lots of Love

Lisa
xxx
 

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hi katie

thats wonderful news hun we are all here for you just call when you need anything hun i understand what you are going through but we will get through this i know we will and have our babys the counsellor will help keep us posted hun speak soon
love always lilly xxxx

ps are you going to meet in august i am would love to meet you and dh
 

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Hi Katie

I just wanted to say we are all here for you and know how difficult this is.........it is nearly a year from DH biopsy and some days it still feels as hard.........but the rest, we are just working towards our goal of having our baby.........

It just takes loads and loads of talking......and crying (in our case) and it does get easier........

Do they feel that it may be worth while to try again??

Keep in touch

JenFx
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Dear All,

Many thanks for your replies.

JenF, no one has mentioned trying again but we have an appointment on the 13th so they may have more info on the biopsy. We then go on holiday for 10 days to Spain  ^holiday^ which will give us both some quality time together and prepare ourselves for when we get back to proceed with DIUI.

Lilly, did you go to the meet in August? If so how did you get on? How's things going with you and dh?

Lisa, thank you for your message. It always feels like a big hug when people take the trouble to reply.

^fairydust^ Hope the baby dust works on us all.
Katie xx

 

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Hi Katie I hope you don't mind me jumping on.  I just wanted to say how much I feel for you and to wish lots of luck.

I also wondered, did they try incubating the sample that they retrieved?  I only ask becuase my DH had a biopsy back in March and we were told he had no sperm, and we spent 24 hours in devastated shock. Then the next day they rang and said they had incubated the sample overnight and they had found a very very small amount of poor quality sperm - just enough for 1 ICSI.  My DH got the impression at the time that the andrologist had taken slightly more smaples then he normally would as he'd said to his colleagues during the op "I'd like to take an extra one".

They also took a tissue sample to check for testicular cancer.

Anyway, probably not much help but very best of luck to you. XX
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Hi Ermy  ^afro^,

Dh was out for the count and I think they had a very good look around as he had stiches in both sacks and he was bruised and sore for at least a week. It was 24 hours before we got the results so I guess (hope) they tried everything. I also guess they tested any samples but eh no news is good news on that front. Hope we know more on the 13th.

Katie x  ^goodluck^ with your treatment. Keep us posted.
 

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Hi Everyone!

My hubby has just found out he has no sperm in his sample, he has had a reversal which worked but now it seems things have gone wrong again? We have got to have sperm retrieval and ICSI, should he be taking any supplements, if yes what should he be taking and how much. Will it improve things if he does take supplements? Any help would be hugely appreciated!

Thanks

Jo
:)
 

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All I can say is DH took zinc, on the sly, prior to our 2nd attempt and his sperm count rose significantly! Lisamarie's dh was given it on the sly to her, he had had a vasectomy and his sperm cpunt rose and they now have a booty girl!
Lots of girls talk about Marylin gLENVILLE, SHE DOES LOTS OF WORK RE FERTILITY AND SUPPLEMENTS.
You can male supplements from her web site, check out one of the other bopards for her web site address.
Good luck.
Love
Jan WelshyX
 

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Hi Katie

Sorry hun only just seen your post yes we went to the meet and it was so wonderful we are going to next one hope you can come would be lovely to meet you and all the girls on this site dh and i are great thanks started sniffing and injections start 22nd so not long now hopeyou are doing well hun speak soon

love always lily xxx
 

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Hi Katie,

My Dh has no sperm, he had testicular cancer over 10years ago but he didn't really believe that would affect his sperm completely until we began ttc.  My dh didn't want anyone to know but I was beginning to really struggle emotionally and had to really help him understand that I needed to discuss this with my family as I needed more support.  If we were going to try donor sperm then the only way was if I had the help of some of my family.  He finally accepted this and so three years on and 4 failed DIUI's later the only people who know are my parents but it makes all the difference when I get the -ve after the dreaded 2ww!  They keep me positive.  Our next move is a Tese to try and retrieve some sperm and hoping that there are just a couple to try ICSI but the chances are very, very slim but we just have to know either way.  Councelling has been great for us it really helped us come to terms with using donors, I hope you too can benfit from their expertise.  Good luck in whatever your next move is. 
Take care Jo
 

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Hullo,

As a bloke I was terrified of having no sperm my dw and, I are very close and talk (& cry - yes even me together).  The problem is as we went towards SSR we discussed donor sperm, I tried to sound fair but inside I felt sick & that I would be left out in a way, however as I worked things out things didn't seem so bad.

What I'm trying to get at is we all need time to work things out and the problem being, we feel time & DP pressure (whether it exists or not), as we all have this X years ttc etc... & we all know what we want in seconds.

As a bloke we can get sucked into a feeling of dejection rather than achievement (yes even getting through the treatment is an achievement) but it's hard to change until you find you want to talk about it.

Anyway you're all brave people so you should be fine.  ;)

As for supplements most people I knew and myself did 'Selerium ACE' and Garlic tablets.  Hope it helps but my best advice for blokes is reduce the stress and worry it's a killer for the balls.

TTFN
Andy

 

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Emma -

good lick for tomorrow ^goodluck^

My Dh has azoospermia and we are waiting for an appointment for biopsy from one clinic and for a 2nd opinion from another!!!!! :eek:

Sending you heaps of  ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^

Lol

Mae
 

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Think that was supposed to say Good Luck on my last post...not 'Good LICK'!!!
But hey ho...take it how you like!!!!!!!!!! ^roflmao^ ^roflmao^ ^roflmao^ ^roflmao^

Mae
 
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