Fertility Friends Support Forum banner

1 - 5 of 5 Posts

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
4,804 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hello ,
I've been nosing around this site for 4 days now , i've been a bit unsure where to post , but think this may be the one for me , please advise if it's not . Just want to meet a few people i can talk to that are in a similar position to me , ie just getting on this rollercoaster . I've been ttc for 4 yrs with dh , and have just been told that i wont be able to naturally and will need assisted conception . From what i gather this will be ivf . Had other blood tests and dh had sperm tests and they said all was ok ? But now they say Tubes blocked and clubbed and they couldnt even get the dye down in the L&D , well they said there was no point trying they were so bad .
Have also been told NHS won't fund this as dh has 23 yr old son . Feel very alone , and unsure of what where next , have a follow up with consultant i've been seeing in Jan , which seems yrs away , wish i had had more strength to ask questions after the lap instead of crumpling up in to a sobbing ball . Summond up the courage to phone the hospital y day to try and find out exactly what was on my notes , and was told i was to late they had gone from there and i now had to wait .
dh being realy good and patient with me , but asks me whats wrong , whats wrong ??????? feel like screaming do you need to ask ?! i don't feel myself any more , my life been so drastically changed , everything i look at makes me think of how life was when i was happy and hopefull , now i just feel empty . Can't face talking to people , can't answer phone and am  off work , dont know what to say to people , feel a failure , an embarisment , wonder if i'm being punished for something . Head just screwed up .
:'( Sorry ladies , but its got to come out .......
I've sent off for info on local clinics , have also seen how much they charge , if you dont qualify for nhs , i guess theres no other people who help you financially  right ?
omg that sounds a ramble ,
sorry to ladies
j
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
7,184 Posts
Hi J

Welcome to FF, the people on here are fantastic and are able to offer so much advice.  I am not as far on with the investigations as you so can't be much help but just thought I'd welcome you and say that I know what you mean about the 'not knowing' bit.  We are waiting for the results of a sperm test to find out our next course of treatment.  If the results aren't good then we will be off down the 'assisted' route too....  All this stuff scares the hell out of me and at times it does feel really lonely out there.  We haven't told anyone about our problems yet either as we are waiting to see how bad the situation really is.  DH is great but as a bloke he doesn't really, really get it (am hoping the sperm test is ok as I fear that could take him down quite low).

Have just realised that this is turning in to a bit of a 'me' post so just really wanted to say good luck and best wishes with the treatment - and keep posting as that's why we are all here - to support each other.

Fluffs xxx
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
4,610 Posts
hi J

i understand how you are feeling hun, i used to get really angry with my dh when he asked whats wrong ??? (still do sometimes) grrrrrr  but now i have started to accept men just don't think the same way we do it doesn't mean they don't care they just cope in a different way.
i think a lot of us on this site will be able to relate to what you're saying and we don't mind anyone letting off steam thats what we are here for  ^Cuddle^

why don't you join us all on the chitter chatters, i know you will be very welcome and as we are all at different stages on there (some in between, some pg and some waiting to start tx etc. ) there will usually be someone who can help with any questions you may have.

look forward to getting to know you better, take care

luv pam xx

 

·
Registered
Joined
·
130 Posts
Hya hun

My dh has a son of 14 but we are being funded by NHS.....as long as they dont live with you its ok to get NHS funding.i cant believe they have turned you down cause your dh has a 23 year old!!!!.bang out of order...

I know what you mean by feeling an embarrasement cause so do i!...I sometime feel that im such a bad person why my body wont work...and i hate my body cause of it....the good thing about this site that there is loads of people feel;ing exactly the same way as yourself and it is somewhere to come to when other people dont understand!...cause even your bestest friends wont understand if they have kids.and your dh altho he is there for you he still wont fully understand cause he has a child jus like mine!!

Keep your chin up and dont give up your dreams.

Love Jan xxxx
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
4,804 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thanks for the replies ladies , was v low n in tears as i ranted , today is a bit better day you'll be pleased to know .
I'd love to join you in the chitter chatters and shall post there next ! Just wasnt sure which board would be best for me , with every one being at different stages .
JAN I was just bluntly told no , if your dh has a son then you have to pay ?? - all very cold i felt , and at the time i was too upset to question . As i said dh's son 23 and dosent live with us ?? Does anyone know where i can find the funding guidelines for Notts / Derby so i can research this ?? There must be a web site , but i havent found it yet .
^reiki^ to you all
Jx
 
1 - 5 of 5 Posts
Top