Fertility Friends Support Forum banner
1 - 7 of 7 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
5 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi my name is claire and i joined this froum about 2 weeks ago and have been getting alot of comfort from knowing i am not alone in wher i am right now...
i am 32 years old and am very lucky to have a DD of 5and half years old...for the last 4 years we have been ttc no 2 in dec 2006 i had a lap and dye which showed that my left FT was not joined together and ther was a small hole in the right FT...  he also found lots of adhesions and mild endometriosis ...this came as a big shock as i had DD and couldn't understand how this could be... i did have an emergency caesarean with her but my consultant said it was unlikely to have caused this and it must have been congenital.... so started my guilt and shame that i was 'broken' inside... i know this sounds crazy but it was how i felt..(still do to be honest)
the surgeon suggested he may be able to rejoin the Left FT and divide the adhesions and laser the endometriosis.. so last july i had major surgery in an effort to increase my fertility chances... he left the right tube alone as he said it was probably how i conceived DD... surgery went ok and off we went  to TTC... ini february this year i found out i was pregnant.. unfotunately it was Ectopic.. i knew there was an increased risk of this happening but didn't give it any  serious thought ( you never do do you?)   I was devastated.. I had a laparoscopy on the 2nd feb and they took my precious oh so wanted baby away...they saved my tube but i think it was because i cried so much about the thought of losing it.. i felt that they would take my natural fertility away.. ( i had tried to conceive for 3 and half years on the other tube and nothing had happened) i had an HSG last month which showed free spill in both tubes although it was slow spill.... the consultant said that although it was still possible to get pregnant naturally there is a big chance that i will have another EP and so Ivf is probably my best option....i have found this very hard to deak with as i  feel it is such a mammoth thing to take on and i do not feel strong enough emotionally.. also i amd quite over weight....i lost 4 stone 2 years ago and with all this going on i have put three of it back on again...
I know how lucky i am to have DD she truly is a miracle but i so deperately want another child... i can't bear to see pregnant women or new born babies....no one in my family or friends understands what we are going through.. DH has been fantastic through all this...
we have decided to continue to TTC until September ( whilst i try to lose weight)  and then we will consider IVF....
i am sorry for the long rambling post and thanks to anyone who has managed to get this far...
I look forward to hearing from you all and receiving  ( and giving) the great support from you all.
claire
xxx
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,863 Posts
Claire, Welcome to FF, you'll find lots of help and support here, it's been a lifeline for me.

Regarding your weight, you've lost 4 stone before so losing 3 should be no problem, you've done it before. I'm a weight watcher, so I know it can be a challenge.

One of the mods will be along to point you in the right direction, there are lots of sections that will probably be of interest

In the meantime, hope the TTC brings you a surprise  ^reiki^ ^reiki^ miracle

xx
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
116 Posts
hi claire

i'm new too - i joined today after a friend said that this was one of the most helpful and supportive fertility sites. i was so sorry to hear that you are having such a difficult time. from your post it seems as though you feel a little guilty about wanting another child so desperately when you already have a dd. please dont put that extra pressure on yourself - it is perfectly natural for you to want to continue building a family.

as for the weight, i struggle with that too. i am the world's most professional comfort eater! i must have yo-yo'd through the past decade so i know what you're going through and how hard it is to get motivated. (i write this whilst snacking on a snickers bar!!!!)

i was diagnosed with endo 5 years ago but at 19, i wasnt ready to start ttc. after 5 laps and loads of hormone treatments it still comes back with a vengeance! even though i'm married, there is still a part of me that feels overwhelmed to even be thinking of having a baby - i guess thats just nerves right? i need to get over it though coz they say i'll need a hysterectomy within 3-5 years!

i wish you all the luck in the world and hope that you dont find this message weird enough to block my replies in the future!

lots of love n hugs ^reiki^ ;)

stacey p xx
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
20,592 Posts
^hello^
& Welcome to FF Claire
^hugme^ ^hugme^

every so Often I read a story of a struggle to concieve and I fill with tears, I did reading yours tonight,
all those feelings you feel and describe are Normal especially after loss, diagnosis and Major surgery!
The Weight loss will come when your able to focus on it being a positive thing to be doing for baby number 2 ;) change a little at a time, dont overwhelme yourselves.
I am going to leave you some direct links to boards here on FF - that you may or may not have found, I would like to encourage you to post in these areas to build friendships and support from members who really do have an understanding of your situation, You may find there is an active running thread for ladies having treatment at the same clinic as you check both the ICSI & IVF boards as we don't have separate clinic threads for each
Secondary Infertility
CLICK HERE

Hydrosalphinx - (may be of some help)
CLICK HERE

Endo ~
CLICK HERE

Pregnancy loss
CLICK HERE

Forget me not ~ A place for our members to remember their loved but lost babies.
CLICK HERE


Belly Buddies -
CLICK HERE

We also have a section on FF called Babydust, where parents can chat and share parenting tips.
And don't forget to have a bit of fun while you are on FF and check out the general chit chat / jokes / hobbies area
G&B – Community Fun board
CLICK HERE

You can also chat live in our excellent chat room.
We have a newbie night in the chat room every week (Wednesday at 8pm ;)
where you can meet other new members and get Chatrrom support
and help to navigate the site and using all the functions available here. CLICK HERE FOR INFO ON NEWBIE CHAT

Take some time to look at the help tab too ;)

Check out the Locations boards for where you live & a site search for your clinic ;)

Wishing you Friendship ^fairydust^ & ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^
^goodluck^ Dont forget to let us know how you get on!

If you need any help just ask!

~Dizzi~
^willy nilly^
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
5 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Morning and thanks for all your lovely replies...

Canoworms,
funnily enough i am finding it much harder this time to lose the weight again.. life keeps getting in the way and i am a big comfort eater... even knowing i have the incentive of wanting to be healthy if i did get pregnant again... the negative thoughts come in and make it hard to not eat rubbish... but i am getting there...

Stacey, it sounds as if you have had a tough time too...you say you feel overwhelmed at the thought of having a baby and i can understand that... most women of 24 do not have the added worry of difficulty in TTC and the added pressure that brings.... i wish you lots of luck in TTC.. and your post made me laugh i won't be blocking any future replies..LOL

Thanks Dizzy,  for all the links to other parts of the board... i willlook them up over the next few days... it really means alot to know that there are others out there who are having similar struggles as me.. it makes me feel not so alone.. even though i wouldn't wish for anyone to go through what we have been through....

Anyway, hopefully i will get to know you all a bit better over the next few weeks/months and be able to give you some support in return...
have a good weekend
Claire
xxx ^reiki^ ^hugme^
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
20,592 Posts
Claire your welcome hun, I am sure your going to make lots of new friends over the comming weeks and months

~Dizzi~
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
566 Posts
Hi Claire

Just wanted to say Hi and welcome to FF.

Your story really touched me, it sounds like you have had such a difficult time.  When you talk about feeling 'broken inside' I was almost in tears, it describes to a tee how many of us often feel.  You may not feel strong emotionally right now but you have already been through so much that I'm sure you have great inner strength. 

You have been given some great advice by the other girls already and Dizzi has left you some excellent links to the other boards.  If you are struggling with the wieght loss I would encourage you to post in belly buddies, it can really help you to stay positive and motivated when you have the support of others with the same goal.

I wish you lots of luck on your journey, sending  ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ and  ^hugme^ ^hugme^ for you.

Foxy x
 
1 - 7 of 7 Posts
Top