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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hello ladies

After reading your lovely posts for a few weeks, have finally decided to get my courage together and create a post.  This website is the friendliest I have come across!  ;D

I am Drew - turning 30 this year.  Got married four years ago and tried to get pregnant straight away.  After a year of `nothing', doctor put me on numerous cycles of Clomid, was on maximum dosage and didn't even produce a single follicle.

Then I started on injections - terrible stuff.  I didn't respond too well and starting to bleed profusely at Day 12.  Was devastated.  Laproscopy reviewed that I have Stage III Endo, one tube blocked, the ovary on the same side is glued to my bowel wall.  Spots of endometria on the pelvis.  My right ovary is in good condition but for some reason I hardly ovulate on my own without using FSH drugs.  So far I have had three laps already for a general `clean up' before a stimulated cycle.

Been through a few FETs and a fresh IVF - all failed.   :'( I had good embies (grades I and II) but for some reason they just won't implant. The last FET cycle everything was fine (hormones-wise) but my embies did't survive the thawing.  I was devastated and didnt' want to live.  Fortunately I pulled myself together and now - after recovering from another lap I am on Day 6 of a fresh cycle.

Thanks ladies for reading - I enjoy reading your posts because you are so friendly and informative.  All the best to those who are trying to conceive! :) :) :) :)

Drew


 

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Hi Drew

Welcome to FF.  I'm also starting my 2nd fresh ivf next week.  We may end up on the 2ww together  :).

I'm sorry you have nt had much luck with your previous txs but it's good to hear you have good quality embryos.  Fingers crossed that this will be the one  ^reiki^.

love and luck

Becca
x

 

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hi drew, just wanted to welcome you to ff & wish you the best of luck with this cycle.
take care - t x
& to you becca, my last (& 1st) cycle was about the same time as yours, we're thinking of trying again soon - wishing you all the very best!
cheers - t x
 

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Dear Drew

Wow !!! You've really been through it !  Welcome to Fertility Friends, glad you found us.

Just wanted to wish you all the best for this new fresh cycle....wishing you loads of luck and babydust :)

Best wishes
Amanda xxx
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Hello ladies,

You won't believe how happy I am to read your response this morning) ;D ;D ;D.  Today is Day 7 of my fresh cycle and I woke up early in the morning feeling my ovaries are going to explode.  I am on 150mg of Gonal injections currently.  Tomorrow will be going for first blood tests. 

Thanks so much ladies for telling me about yourselves.  And Becca I am glad to have you to sympathise with during the horrible 2ww!!!  This time I am going to take things easy (not think about it too much).  But I am really scared. 

Amanda can I ask you how bad is your Endo?  I know of heaps of ladies who have severe endo and went on to have successful pregnancies.  My doctor is asking me nicely to have my infected ovary removed.  But I don't want to because I think I am still too young for that - but at the same time I don't know what harm it is doing to me  ^police^

Thanks for all your encouragement!  I LUUUURVE this website. :) :)

Drew
 

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Hiya Aunty_Drew

Just wanted to offer you a warm welcome to fertility friends

So glad that you found us.

I am sorry ur previous tx havent been successful but hoping that this fresh cycle will end with the BFP that you so desire and are entitled to.

I had my ovary and tube removed due to the endo, if you would like to chat things over with thoughts feelings etc i am more than happy to, either send me an im or send me an email or add me to msn if you have it.

I can often be found in the chat room also lol

bit of a chat aholic lol

^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^ ^reiki^

ps i have stage 4 endo dx oct 2001 and pcos dx 94
 

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Hi Drew

Both my ovaries and tubes are affected by endo with enometrinomas.  My consultant wanted to removed my right  ovary last yr during a lap but could nt due to adhesions.  I am now glad that he did nt as I only produced 4 eggs and 3 were from that ovary  :).  The clinic are happy to leave well alone.

I look foreward to joining you soon  ;D

Love

Becca
x
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Hi Becca,

It's interesting that you said that the majority of the eggs produced are from your `bad' ovary.  Me too!  I don't know what are the reasons behind it, but for me my last fresh cycle I had better response from the `bad' ovary than from the `good' ovary.  I had something like 4 from bad and 2 from good.  That is one of the reasons why I am reluctant to remove my left ovary because it is still producing useful eggs.  :p :p :p

My doctor explained to me that if I remove the bad ovary, the good ovary will cope with the egg production and respond accordingly.  But there is always a chance that this won't happen - don't know?  I am going to live through this fresh cycle and see what happens. 

Good luck!!!!!!

Cheers,
Drew  ^daisy^
 

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Hi Drew

I dont blame you for hanging on the both ovaries if they dont bother you.  Is it the fertility clinic who are suggesting it should be removed?  I seem to remember my consultant saying that the other ovary would make up for the loss of the other.  I'm still not keen to have it removed though because the 'good' one is also damaged by endo and is stuck in a high position making ec difficult.  The fertility clinic is also not keen for me to have the ovary removed, which is fine by me  :)

I see that a lot of girls on this thread have had several laps/laser tx to clean up.  I'm a bit miffed that when my consultant did the lap last year, he did this to diagnose me and nothing else.  Oh well.

Ohh I've been giving this site some welly in the last few days!  I'm going for some acupucture on Tue and due to start tx on Fri - yipee.  I'm all excited.

I was a bit naughty last night, went out and had a few Bacardi's.  It was a one off as I rarely drink now.  Did nt get drunk though.

Did you see that Alison Jane got a  ^reiki^ yesterday.

Good luck with your blood test, it sounds like the stims are working nicely.

love

Becca
x
 

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Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Hi Becca,

Unfortunately for me this cycle is another `cancelled' one. ^eyes^

I am currently Day 10 into my cycle, but was officially cancelled yesterday.

Went for my Day 8 blood test - and was told that my E2 was 1800.  I thought 1800 on Day 8 wasn't too bad!!  The nurse said it is too high, and my doctor said he may need to cancel my cycle.

I had to do a Day 9 blood test and ultrasound.  Ultrasound revealed that I had 40+ eggs, each at various stages of maturity (ranges from very small, to 12mm to 18mm).  Day 9 blood test revealed my E2 levels were sky rocketed to 28,000!!!  My cycle was offically cancelled yesterday.

I found out later on that the nurse made a mistake about my Day 8 blood results - it was actually 18,000 not 1,800!!!!

I am more worried about the 3cm endometrioma they found on my bad ovary - does anybody has a similar experience? 

I am sad because I have so many cancelled cycles already.  The clinic don't seem to be able to get my FSH dosage correct.  I am either under-stimulated or over-stimulated. 

Good luck to the other ladies who are undergoing a fresh cycle!!!

Drew  :'(
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Hi Becca,

Thanks for your response - it was very soothing and positive.  I really appreciate it!    :)

Yeah all my transfers/IVFs/FET cycles are carried out in this clinic.  The thing I am angry about is the fact that this is not the first time I was overstimulated.  Once I was so over stimulated that I bled on Day 11/12 (full blown period).  But that was forgivable because that was my first injection cycle and they were just testing the waters.  But then I had a second cycle with Puregon and ended up with 25+ eggs - but too immature to be collected.  Sometimes I question if it is me or is it the clinic's fault.

Well this is the first time I know I can `make' endometriomas.  All I had been told was it was a blood filled cyst - but wasn't told if it was a threat to my future cycles.  If I was lucky enough to get to ec, the doctor will definitely drain it for me because that's what he did to a friend of mine. 

I am just worried that I keep having to repeat cycles and continue pumping myself with all these fertility drugs, my endometriosis is getting worse and worse.

Unfortunately the clinic I am going to at the moment is one of two clinics available at where I live.  :(  This is considered to be the better clinic because lots of the women go there.  But the downfall is sometimes I feel I am just another number because they are just so busy looking after everybody.  Waiting for a blood test is often 1 hour+ because they are just so busy!!!

Thanks Becca - it was really good to hear from you this morning!

Lv, Drew
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
Oh Becca,

Sorry I got so carried away with my own story I forgot to talk to you about yours:

I have tried Acupunture before :) (mainly for hormonal balance - but I know of a few ladies who does it just before they go in for a transfer).  I must say the experience wasn't too pleasant.  It hurt a bit because I was so nervous, and I kept moving around (trying to adjust myself to make myself more comfortable).  I have been told it works wonders for hormonal balance and `calming' of the uterus prior to embryo transfer - but I never went back again.  I am trying to talk myself around it and maybe find another clinic who is a little bit `gentler'. 

Pls let me know how it all goes! 

Lv, Drew



 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
Hi Becca,  ;)

You are right - sometimes I just feel that the clinic is not paying enough attention to me (in terms of monitoring and accessing me).  Unfortunately medical insurance rules have changed for us recently, which means we no longer have the option of a refund if things don't work out.  So it is a flat fee for everybody.  It really adds on the pressure financially and emotionally. Really frustrating.  :-\

And you know the worst thing about me - I have LONG gaps between periods.  Sometimes it is 80+ days - which means I cannot afford to have too many screw ups because I have less time as compared to other women.

Also I worry about my ovarian reserve - I have so many screw ups that I worry about the wasted eggs produced as a result of the stimulations.  This time probably 40+ or 50+ eggs showed up - last time it was 25+,  and god knows how many I have wasted while they are trial and erroring me!!!!

Ouch you went for acupunture.  Did you ask the acupunturist what pressure points he used?  For my session - I didn't need to strip off.  I had my bra on and jeans on - and I was allowed to cover up my top half with a towel - which is easy because I was lying on my back.  The pressure points used were the top of my head, forehead, three points on both my arms, on my hands and three other points on my leg and feet.  He didn't go anywhere near my torsel.  But I think it all depends on what treatment you asked for and what he end up prescribing. 

Take care and talk to you soon!!!! 

Lv, Drew

 

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Hello Drew

I'm not absolutely sure but I think the many eggs you have produced during ivf cycles are a drop in the ocean and would not affect your egg reserve.  You could post a question on Ask a Nurse to be sure though.  Have you had your FSH levels checked?  Apparently that can give you an indication about egg reserve, although it's conclusive. 

I started down regging yesterday and supposed to have my FSH checked but they did nt bother.  I'm not sure I want to know just yet!!

I really hope your clinic can get it right for you next time.  It must be really hard to wait for af with such long cycles. 

The acupuncturist did tell me about the various points but I cant remember them ! He did nt put any on my head though.  He put them in my lower legs, feet, tum, chest (above my  nollies!) and arms.  It was not very comfortable.

Are you having a consultation to discuss your next tx?

love

Becca
x
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Hi Becca,  :)

Thanks for the reassurance!!  Whenever I ask for my test results i seem to concentrate on the E2 and P4 but never really FSH - but I will from now on!! ::)

The one good thing with my clinic & doctor is they understand our financal situation.  If I have a failed cycle or if my cycle gets cancelled, they don't really need to see you unless you want to - mainly my doctor communicates with me via the clinic nurses - he will instruct what to do next, and usually for me I don't need to do anything except to wait for my period and TRY AGAIN  :(.  This way he saves us doctor fees for the review appointment.  I guess it is nice to talk to the doc afterwards - and I often find myself making appointments to see him after a miserable cycle to ask questions.  But no for this cycle I am not seeing my doctor until the next fresh cycle (which I hope can at least get me through to EC!!!!).  ^eyes^

Do you think I should wait for this period to come, and then another one before I start again?  My poor ovaries must be shell-shocked because I had surgery on them only a few weeks ago.... :-X

Take care!!!!!

Lv Drew
 

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Hello Drew  :)

What are E2 and P4?  I've never heard of that.

Have you tried Angus Castus?  It's a natural herb that a lot of woman use inbetween cycles to regulate af and help your homones return to normal.  A lot of the women on here have tried it with good results.  Apparantly it can take a few months to kick in but it would nt do any harm.  You can order it on the internet.  There's loads of info about it on this site.  You must stop taking it though when you start tx.

Personally I think if you feel well with your next af and feel recovered from the lap I would start tx then.  But if you feel your body has not recovered I would wait.  It's a tough one to decide for.  I would go with what your body is telling you.  I was supposed to start 2nd ivf tx in June but really did nt feel well enough as endo flared up bad after 1 failed attempt.  I reluctantly cancelled so I know how you feel.

It's good that your clinic is sympathic to the cost of tx and tries to keep the fees down by advising you via the nurses.

I've had a bit of a stressful day today as we are buying a house and there has been some minor hitches.  I gave up smoking recently and been having terrible cravings.  Thought a nice bath would help but when I ran it the water was brown  :eek:.  I should have stayed in bed this morning  :mad:.  dp is sat drinking a can of cidar so I had a little sip.

bye for now.

love

Becca
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
Hi Becca,

Yeah we use the P4 and E2 terms when we fill in our blood test forms - E2 is estrogen level, P4 is progesterone, and LH is lutenizing hormones.  These are the usual things I got tested for.

Is Angus Castus the same thing as Chasteberry tree leaves???  If so I have been taking it for a few months now.  I don't know if it worked for me, but last cycle (the cycle before the cancelled one), I started to chart my body temperatures, and it seems like my body is doing the right thing and I think I might have even ovulated!  Shock! Horror!!!)  :)

Yeah I agree with you about feeling good about your body before you take on another cycle.  It is just that IVF is so taxing on your mind and body - you really need to be ready and relaxed for it!  My DH only allows me to do it providing I am in one of my more `positive' moods and I am not feeling sick from endo.  Ha!  That will be the day!  My left ovary currently is pressing on my bowel - probably hitting a nerve, so now my entire left side (from left thigh to my left shoulder blade) is hurting.  I am in alot of pain today. :(

Becca good luck with purchasing that new house of yours, and good on you for quitting smoking!  I am currently indulging myself after my cancelled cycle - I have a nice BIG chocolate pudding sitting in the fridge at home waiting for me to tackle it....hee hee.

(Do you agree that sugar makes endo worse?  I figured I am so internally not well that another piece of chocolate cake won't do anymore harm!!!).

Hope you enjoyed that cider sweetie and have a fabulous weekend!!!!! 

Lv and hugs,

Drew
 

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Hi Drew

I dont know if angus castus is the same as chasteberry tree leaves.  I've never heard of chasteberry trees.  Glad to hear that you ovulated  :).  I've never tried to the temp things.  My consultant said it was not a good idea to use it to time bms.  He said if you have regular bms then it would nt be nessecary.  That said, I would love to know if I do actually ovulate without help, even if everything else is blocked up.

Thanks for enlightening about the blood tests.  I havent had any tests for this tx yet and I started downregging on Tues last week.

I know what you mean, this whole ivf thing is testing enough, but I think it's worse for girls with endo as it flares thing up.  For the last 7 years I did nt have any pain or discomfort from endo, only prolonged beeding. (however I was in agony prior to that).  Since the failed ivf I have been reliant on strong anti-inflammatories and have to use tampons that are made for woman who have given birth naturally to 6 kids  :eek: (sorry if thats tmi).

It's werid you say you get pain in your shoulder blade.  I dont want to steel your thunder but I get that and the pain in leg.  My consultant said it's nothing to do with endo, but it can be quite bad during af.

I'm sure the choc cake will do more good than harm.  I've not heard about sugar being bad for endo.  I know what you mean about being internally unwell.  I frequently moan to friends about being 'all wrong inside' lol.

Thing have sorted themselves out on the house front and we hope to move in about 2 weeks.

Hope you're having a groovy weekend and have some more cake - enjoy  ;D

love

Becca
x

 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
Hi Becca,  ;)

It's amazing that you said you went through 7 years with no particular pains, and since you are on the IVF program you suddenly experienced so much pain!  You poor thing.  I know my endo has worsen during the past few years whilst I am trying to conceive using all sorts of synthetic drugs.  ^evil^
My surgery photos really show the damage.  I probably had endo since my late teens and didn't get diagnosed until I was 27.  Before I was trying to get pregnant I only get little `ickling' pains on the ovary, but nothing to be alarmed about.  Now I can REALLY feel the circus in me, especially during a stimulated cycle - and especially when I have my period.  These days, the first two days of my cycle I NEED painkillers, if I don't take painkillers my face will be white with pain and I will have breathing difficulties.  It is scary.  Oh yes - having a period is like the Niagara Falls.  ::)

FYI - my blood tests on the weekend revealed the PCV (something to do with oxygen in blood - it apparently gives you an indication if you are still overstimulated) is normal.  My estrogen is still slightly high (340) - that may mean I still have small immature eggs inside which is not going away, or it may mean I still have that endometrioma hanging around.  The clinic don't seem to be worried about this - but I am.  I just want to be `normal' ASAP so I can get on to my next cycle. 

And oh, I had the biggest period on the weekend, it started on Day 15 of my cycle.  Apparently this is normal after a stimulated cycle is abandoned.  I was clotting quite a fair bit and it is a rather heavy `period'.

If all goes well - I hope God will do small favours for me by blessing me with a period soon, possibly in mid October (sigh...wait so long).  Then I will be back to injections again and THIS TIME I am going to tell them (NOT TOO MUCH DRUGS PLEASE). ^police^

Take it easy Becca!

Lv, Drew
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
Hi Becca,

Oh that AF dance was soooooo funny - I really cracked myself up!!  ;D ;D ;D.  Thanks so much, I think I also need to dance like the tribal people when they ask for rain - the nurses at the clinic laughed at me when I said whenever my period comes it is like christmas for me!!!!  Oh imagine saying that to a teenage girl!!!!  Oh my period is here ...yeah!!!!!!  ^banana^ ^banana^ ^banana^ ^banana^ ^banana^ ^banana^

Finally I am on the end phase of this terrible negative cycle  ^eyes^- my period seems to be coming to an end after six days.  Mind you - like you I also have long long long periods - my last one lasted 9 days, then I had one day break, then it came again!!!  I think it is because my hormones are all over the place  ::).    This may sound gross, but I haven't been able to get any waxing done DOWN THERE for two months now - it is because I am either regging or something else is happening.  I find it so annoying. 

Oh and I know exactly what you mean about the high pain threshold `earned' while suffering endo.  I keep telling people I am in pain, but I say it with a smile, even though inside I know I am hurting like hell (twisting, throbbing, thumping, pulling pains), but it is because I am so used to it, there is no other way to deal with it except to grin and bear.  But honestly I never used to be in too much pain, it is only recently that I noticed things are nose-diving.

I have another friend who told me she is pregnant for the first time.  She wasn't even planning it and it just happened, I was happy for her but she knows I am a bit emotional about it.  :(  But what can you do??

Becca can I ask you how much stim do you use (or intend to use during next cycle?).  Do you normally ovulate on your own?? 

Thanks and take care for now...and thanks so much for the AF dance - that brought a smile to my face for the first time today!!!

Lv, Drew
 
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