[DizziSquirrel]

hi
my best friend is being an egg donor for us, and we had an appointment on valentines day she has since had all her letter and stuff to have her blood tests but has not had them yet as she is waiting to see the counselor first, i understand this but no mention of which hospital/councilor she is going to see has been made or when. i am not really sure how to ask.
she is now on holiday for a couple of weeks so i was hoping that she would do it during this break as we plan the TX to be in the school summer hols and the blood tests take 6 weeks to come back.
she is in London and works in a school i am in Shrewsbury!!!
dizzi

 

[Jayne]

Awwwww Dizi, it's a hard one    Not sure I have the answer for you either, as you know your best friend better than anyone, and know how she'll react if you broach the subject.  I am going to try and give you some honest thoughts though, rather than the traditional 'it'll be okay' answer. 

I suppose this is one of the difficulties of using a known donor.  If your friend is having second thoughts then she may not know how to say this to you as she may be scared it could destroy your friendship.  Now I know this will be incredibly scarey, difficult and painful for you, but maybe you need to offer her an easy way of saying if this is the case, by explaining that if she does back out you would understand and your friendship wouldn't be jeopardised.  Via this route, you will not only be sure of her committment (or, God forbid, lack of it) and if she isn't having second thoughts and really just hasn't got around to sorting out a counsellor, then this will give you and her the opportunity to discuss things further, you can reiterate when you were hoping to start treatment, find out what is happening re the Counsellor, etc. etc. 

I hope that reply hasn't upset you at all.  It's not my intention.  I don't know you or your friend, but I have replied using the info you provide in your post. 

Wishing you lots of luck, and I hope things turn out well for you with your friend being an egg donor. 

Love

Jayne x

 

[DizziSquirrel]

thank you - somtimes you just need to voice it to one person to be sure you can say it/ask about it! am i making sense??  hope so
she is going to ring me back today as weve not really had much chance to chat recently so i am hoping that when we do the subject will come up anyway,
i will let you know how it goes.....
thanks
Dizzi

 

[Jayne]

Hi Dizzi

Hope the phone call with your best friend went okay. 

Love
Jayne x

 

[DizziSquirrel]

hi spoke to her today, nothing mentioned. i asked her what her plans for the hols were and going for blood tests /counseling didn't get a mention.
we did talk a little about the treatment so hopefully a seed has been sown, thanks for thinking of me,

 

[Jayne]

I hope it all works out for you 

Love

Jayne x

 

[DizziSquirrel]

well,  tonight i asked the question sort of!
we spoke tonight and have clarified a couple of things, our donor did not have her last pill inj and has been waiting for AF to arrive, (any time now  fingers x'd) then on day 2 she needs to have the bloods taken, these are then sent in a jiffy bag (no kidding!) to MFS, although she was still keen to do counseling after the bloods came back, i managed to say about finding a clinic in case there was a waiting time needed, and so i am going to get in touch with MFS and find out who /where i need to arrange their counseling and find out about waiting times etc, so we have taken a small step in the right direction at last and a small weight has been lifted from my mind.
Dizzi
XX

 

[Jayne]

Hi Dizzi

Have been thinking of you, and wondering if you'd managed to broach the subject with your friend.  Really pleased to hear things are going in the right direction for you. 

Good luck

Love

Jayne x