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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hi Everyone,


Im at the end of my tether with DD's sleeping, before xmas she would happily go into her cot awake, play with her toys for a few minutes then settle herself to sleep, but over xmas she had a cough and cold and would no longer settle in her cot so we let her fall asleep downstairs in her bouncy chair and now its the only way she will go to sleep, we have to leave her for a few minutes after she's nodded off before we take her to her cot, we tried controled crying much to my DH's horror as he hates to hear her cry when theres something we can do about it, but the thing that totally put us off it is that she bangs her head intentionally on the cot rail while crying and just gets herself into a state so we then have to bring her back down with us to settle her, i really dont know what to do, i want her to settle in her cot again but cant quite see how. 

Any advice would be grately appreciated. 

We dont have a dummy either and ive seriously considered getting one for her to see if it would settle her but i cant quite bring myself to do it as it seems to be going backwards to go forwards but if thats what it takes i will need to get over my dislike for them, she will have a suck at some of her wee pals dummys for a few seconds if they offer it to her but then throws it away.

I want to try and get this sorted now, im on holiday as of Tuesday for 2 weeks and really wanted to try my best to get her out of this and going back to falling asleep in her cot.


Thanks for reading.


xDebsx
 

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Debs- ^hugme^  i went thru a couple of weeks of the same with Bel she would scream when we put her in her cot and left her. One suggestion made to us was to lay in her room with her,  next to the cot so she knew you weren't leaving her have you tried anything like that?  We found laying on our bed with her worked and she calmed, we had the radio on so then we moved this to putting her in her cot with some music on and it seems to have worked she will now go to bed on her own awake
 

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How about pick up/put down??

You may already know about this but basically, you pick LO up when they are crying, hold them to you until they stop, give it a few seconds and then put them back into the cot. If they start to cry again, repeat until they stop.

Or, what did you originally do to get her to self-settle?? Could you not try the same method again??
 

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Hi,

I did answer a bit on the birth thread but I do agree that pick up/put down works so well.  With L when we insisted that he go to sleep himself I let him cry but just for a couple of minutes and I kept going back in, laying him down and giving him his dummy again over and over until he fell asleep probably because he was worn out.  We had this for almost a week and then he managed it.

I dont think I'd give her a dummy - have you tried offering her a drink instead?

You just have to persevere in laying her down I think, giving her a kiss and going through it over and over.  Clare's suggestion is good too - I think that's another baby whisperer one.  Tell DH to get some ear muffs, there's going to be plenty of crying to achieve her own way in the future!!  Its not nice I know but she's learning and also learning what she likes and wants so its a battle of wills!

OOh I sound like a harsh mummy now!!!  :eek: 
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thanks for the replys girls,

Chilli - I'll try and offer her some water next time, she was up for 2 hrs last nite, but its because her canines are coming in.

Kitten - Before she would just settle herself after watching her lightshow for a few minutes, i wish she could go back to that.

Elaine - We have a baby classical cd about, i'll try her with that too.

Clare - Will try some music i think.


DD woke at 3 this morning and i left her for a few minutes to cry as she sometimes will settle herself and go back to sleep, after 5 mins i took her out and tried to settle her but couldnt so i put her back into her cot and got the aero bed out and lay down beside the cot and put on her waterfall lightshow thing with classical music and she looked at the lights for about 10 seconds but wouldnt settle even though i was with her, i'd tried to settle her in our room before this and she wouldnt give in and go back to sleep, when we were in her nursery she was so tired but would not let herself go to sleep, ive ordered the contended sleeping book and the contented toddler years to see if any of the info in there will help, i'll need to look into the pickup/putdown again as i have a babywhisperer book about somewhere, i'll keep trying and will hopefully find something that works for us.


Thanks again for your answers,


xDebsx
 

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Hi,

She must be bothered by her teeth then, L has been a pain waking in the night lately.  I try not to take him away from his cot though, I hold him above it and pat him on the back and then lay him down.  if he creates and wants picking up again I do it all over again.  I've done this for 1/2 hr before until he's finally gone down and gone back to sleep.  Its really tough with toddlers but I didn't get L to go to sleep on his own until after Xmas so I know you can break the habit and she'll get there eventually. 

^hugme^ and hope you get some sleep soon!
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Hi Everyone,


Just wanted to update you all,  I put DD into her cot tonight, gave her milk and put on her rainforrest music and ligh show, i started by sitting beside the cot and every time she would move i moved closer to the door, when she realised i was gone she started crying but i left her for a few minutes and went back in, picked her up, comforted her and put her back down again, she started crying again but stopped afer a few minutes, i went back up after she'd been quiet for about 5 mins and when she saw me she started  :'( :'( again, she nearly had me at it but after another few minutes she was totally quiet, i checked on her again and she was asleep  ;D ;D it took about 40 minutes in total, so a combo of everything worked, i only hope she stays asleep and it goes as well tomorrow nite too.


xDebsx
 

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Debs - just one thing - I think she's a bit old now for PU/PD but you shpuld do walk in walk out (in the baby whipserer). I think the pick up at this age just disturbs them/stimulates them, whereas what you want to do is reassure you are there but not stay til they go to sleep IYKWIM....walk in walk out is the one. It's in the book or on the babywhisperer site.

good luck x
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
MrsJ - Thanks, i had a look on the BW site the other day, i registered ages ago and forgot, i have the book too, will have a look at the walk in/out, when i do PU/PD she cuddles in to my shoulder and then after 5-10 seconds, when i go into her room i stroke her hair before i pick her up, so will try and continue to do that rather than the PU/PD and the Shh pat.

It took 20 minutes tonight and only about 5 of them were crying, she woke up twice last night but settled herself after 5 minutes the 1st time with only about 2 crying and settled herself in about 10 minutes the 2nd time with only about 5 minutes crying, i re-assured her each time and put on her music and lightshow and she was fine, infact she normally takes longer to settle if i take her out of her cot during the night.


xDebsx
 
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