Joined
·
686 Posts
hi girls, x
i feel so sad and depressed today,
i have pcos and i had lap & dye ov drilling last year and when i had a follow up apptiontment my partner had probs, and he had another test, loads of vits stuffed down him and he's now got the all clear he's fine and dicharged (cuz of the vits & might of been cuz 2nd results was for a better look) the thing is i can't help feeling sad, i'm glad he's fine, but i can't help feeling that he cud get someone else - someone better who cud give him the family he wants (we want)
we went on holiday last week and i tried not to think about it all week (really hard!) and i didn't do bad, but it was only a cheap holiday just somewhere to get away really in this country, by the seaside so there was quite a few familys and kiddies about, i couldn't help thinking i wish that was me....
i also had a birthday yeah i know i'm still only 28 but i got a txt off my mil saying ohhh only 2 more years till your 30 i hate it! i don't mind getting old, but i didn't epect to do it without having a family or least one child i feel i'll never be at peace with myself - ever if i don't have a child, i just want it all to end and get on with living but i can't do that cuz i'll always have the next hospital app hanging over me.
i also rung the urologist today and they were refering me back to the gynos now, but they have only just sent the letter over to gynos so that'll be another 2/3 months for another appiontment (i'm guessing) - just waiting and waiting it feels like i'm forever waiting!
i know i sound like i'm wineing and havent even tried much in terms of treatment yet, (thats cuz we are with nhs, and haven't got funds to go private) i'm just sick of it and feels like it will never ever happen for us.
sorry to be a downer xx
caz x
i feel so sad and depressed today,
i have pcos and i had lap & dye ov drilling last year and when i had a follow up apptiontment my partner had probs, and he had another test, loads of vits stuffed down him and he's now got the all clear he's fine and dicharged (cuz of the vits & might of been cuz 2nd results was for a better look) the thing is i can't help feeling sad, i'm glad he's fine, but i can't help feeling that he cud get someone else - someone better who cud give him the family he wants (we want)
we went on holiday last week and i tried not to think about it all week (really hard!) and i didn't do bad, but it was only a cheap holiday just somewhere to get away really in this country, by the seaside so there was quite a few familys and kiddies about, i couldn't help thinking i wish that was me....
i also had a birthday yeah i know i'm still only 28 but i got a txt off my mil saying ohhh only 2 more years till your 30 i hate it! i don't mind getting old, but i didn't epect to do it without having a family or least one child i feel i'll never be at peace with myself - ever if i don't have a child, i just want it all to end and get on with living but i can't do that cuz i'll always have the next hospital app hanging over me.
i also rung the urologist today and they were refering me back to the gynos now, but they have only just sent the letter over to gynos so that'll be another 2/3 months for another appiontment (i'm guessing) - just waiting and waiting it feels like i'm forever waiting!
i know i sound like i'm wineing and havent even tried much in terms of treatment yet, (thats cuz we are with nhs, and haven't got funds to go private) i'm just sick of it and feels like it will never ever happen for us.
sorry to be a downer xx
caz x