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Job hunting while going through IVF

976 views 2 replies 2 participants last post by  chini  
#1 ·
Hello! I'm wondering if there's anyone else in the same situation as me here...

My contract at my previous job ended on the 5th of January, and just a few weeks after that we finally got our referral to start our ICSI treatment - fantastic news, not so fantastic timing haha!

We had our first appointment at the clinic (the one where the whole process is explained, they show how to do the injections etc.) on the 8th of February and I'm now starting down regulating with Norohisterone on the 15th of March.

All this time I've also been job hunting, but as our actual cycle gets closer I've started to feel quite confused about how to approach the job hunting and what to tell potential employers.

Some questions I have in mind are:
- What about going to interviews or starting in a new job while cycling? Has anyone got any recommendations or experiences?
- Which days should I prepare to leave blank in my diary, and could anyone suggest any excuses to use if I get invited to an interview or get asked to start in a new job on those days?
- Should I mention in my applications certain days saying I won't be able to interview on those days?

Combining job hunting and IVF is certainly not the best possible situation to be in, in terms of avoiding stress haha so I'm trying to do my best to keep the stress levels to a minimum : )

Thanks in advance for any thoughts or tips you might be able to share.
 
#2 ·
Hi Chini, good luck for the IVF and also getting a new job.  I was in kind of a similar situation recently.  I had an interview for my current job back in October and was offered the job with a start date to be confirmed once my DBS check had come through.  I was starting norethisterone mid November with stimms for my IVF cycle starting in early December.  I deliberated for ages over what to do and even thought about delaying my cycle.  It was hard as I didn't have a start date until my DBS check came through so it was all a bit uncertain as I didn't know for sure when I'd be starting the job.

In the end I bit the bullet and called my new manager and explained that I'd be doing IVF soon which could coincide with my first few weeks in the job. I explained that I'd been through it several times before and due to my age (41), I couldn't leave it 6 months or a year so had to go for it now.  I also told her the chances of it working were very low!  She was surprised but very understanding and said we could work around it once we knew when I'd be able to start.  She also gave me the option of starting in January too so I could concentrate on treatment and not worry about managing it all in the first few weeks of a new job.  As it happened my DBS check too way longer than I expected so we agreed it would be a better for me to start in Jan.  I still felt happy I'd told her as when I got a BFP, I wasn't worried about having to tell work. I've since had a miscarriage but it's just helped that it's all been out in the open.  I'd decided that if they were funny about it I'd just leave or look for another job.

When I was applying for jobs I had my wedding and mini moon coming up so I just put on the application form that I wasn't available the week beginning.....for interview. 



 
#3 ·
Hi Magicpillow, and thank you! It must have been difficult for you, and I'm really sorry about your miscarriage.

However it's encouraging to hear that the cycle didn't interfere with starting in your new job. Thanks for sharing that!

These last couple of days I've felt so unmotivated about applying that I haven't been getting any applications done, which adds to the frustration... But I'm trying to remind myself that I'm allowed to be confused and take days off from it, as starting our first cycle is a big thing and it's only normal that it's affecting my ability to concentrate on other things...

I do feel it would be so much easier if I had a daily routine of going to work at the moment, meaning less time at home on my own to think about my own life haha.

When I hopefully soon manage to get back into the job hunting mood I'll keep in mind what you said about being open about what's going on, as I could't agree more with you that if a potential employer is funny about it I wouldn't want to work for them anyway.

Thanks for sharing your experience and for the encouragement, it was much needed! x