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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
New home girls...... heres the list, hope I'm as up to date as I should be. Good luck to everyone, lets keep the good news coming......

Post matching

Karen : Approved at panel on 22nd April. First little girl moved in on 8/11/04, second little girl moved in on 9/12/04

Bex (Bex32): Approved at panel in April. X moved in on 8/11/04. Sister due to move in soon.

Ann: Approved at panel on 4th November 2004. Matched to two girls, who moved in in January 2005.

Cindy: Approved at panel on 27th October 2004. Matched to a little boy who moved in Feb 2005.



Post Panel/Awaiting Match

Caroline W: Approved at panel in September, now awaiting a suitable match.

Everhopeful: Approved at Panel on 17th Feb 2005, now awaiting a suitable match. Confirmed preliminary match to a little girl panle in may 2005 for final approval.

Mandy (MSW): Approved at panel on 3/3/2005, now awaiting suitable match


Waiting for Panel Date/Panel Result

Nat (Crazy): Home assessment finished, waiting for panel date



Home Study/Prep Course

Ruth: Currently doing home assessment. Assigned a new SW now moved house. Panel 2/6/2005

Ang (Molly 2003): Course completed awaiting allocation of SW

Kylie (Boomerang Girl): Allocated SW. prep course Jan/Feb 05.

Homer & Marge: Prep course September.

Nicola (NickyDuncanFinn): Prep course Feb 2005

Nicky: Currently doing assessment

Shannis: Prep course starts 2/9/04

Morgana: Allocated SW, currently on course and doing home study.

Donnalee: Home assessment started. Panel date of 7/7/05 given

LB : Prep course starts in Jan 2005

Georgia Prep course starts 2/2/05

Tracey H: Allocated SW and attending prep course in Feb 2005.

JenniferF prep course starts 7/3/05

Pam (saphy75) Prep course in the Spring of 2005

Paddy *Adopting from RUSSIA * SW visit completed and course starts 3/12/04

Val 12 Prep course starts Feb 2005

Jude2 Prep course starts April 2005

Danielle Initial visit done, waiting for prep course dates

Magenta initial visit 21/2/05, prep course August 2005



Initial Stages

Nerys (lochness) Attending Foster Care Open evening on 27/01/05

HelenB Information Day with LA 17th December

Nic (Hopingforbaby) Currently considering the adoption option
Flymypretties Initial visit March 2005

Natasha Intro evening 11th Jan 2005

michelledawn Open evening w/c 14/3/05

Tracey-new Open evening w/c 14/3/05

jainey About to start the journey



Oh where oh where can they be!

Carol (allineedisamiracle): Currently doing home assessment (not sure if Carol is still posting? :-\ )

Jo (jolene): Course completed, awaiting allocation of SW (not sure if Jolene is still posting? :-\ )


Karen x
 

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;D Hi Karen

Thanks for you message and our new home! Can't wait to get onto post matching!

Hoping my worries are simply self-protection! Story so far, little xxxx has been freed for adoption, we have been chosen over other couples to consider xxxx, we have seen profile and photo's of xxxx and like very very much (!!) and following successful meeting and look-round of our home by child's sw - we've been given the firm nod to proceed!! We're meeting with foster mum and have date booked for panel and have been told that xxxx will be living with us within weeks (10-12 to be exact!!)........ surely no-one's thinking it could still go could pear-shaped are they?
Child is freed for adoption and ready to roll, we've fallen head over heels for her, our sw approves, her sw and the adoption sw approves of us as a match.... is this it? Are we really going to be mummy and daddy?
I'm hoping beyond all hope that this works out, because we're already thinking she's our little girl.

"Our" little girl is gorgeous! She is 18 months old and seems like a right little character! She has brown curly hair and the most beautiful dark eyes with long pretty lashes, and a cheeky smile! We cannot wait to see a video of her and especially see her for ourselves!
Only 10 weeks to go til panel and then... well our lives will change forever (but my god, are we ready for it?!!)

I'll be in touch.

;D
 

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Thanks for your prompt responce Karen, it's such a minefield. i learnt everything i had to do do with IVF and now i am having to research all over again. Your process of 22 months is such a lond time. We have a 3 1/2 year old son and would love him to have a brother or sister within the next 12 to 18 months, and one that is under 12 months!!! am i being too obtermistic.....i bet your all thinking "she hasn't got a clue what's in store"

We have to finish our fertility treatment before the assessment can start and that should all be over by June.

Do you have to have a period of time after treatment has finished before you can start the assessment of is it immediatly? We have been thinking about adoption for 2 years or so now so it's not sonething we have to come to terms with. I would hate to finish treatment then have to wait 6 months before we can be assessed.

So many questions!!!!!!!!
 

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one more question....

I am concerned about the 'open adoptions' that seem to be promotes these days. Do you mind me asking if your daughters have any contact with their birth parents and how does it feel.

If this question is too personnel just ignore it.

Thanks  Fiona
 

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I have been following this thread for months. We have been waiting for places on our LA training courses since OCt and are very likely to be on the next ones in June. We should know after Easter and I am soooooooo longing to get the go ahead.
Since deciding firmly on adoption as the way forward for us i have been reading eagerly and am really ready for the next step.
I can't wait to see my name moving up the list on here and to be sharing positive news with you all.........

Frustratingly eager, HHH
 

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Fiona1 - our local authority says there has to be a year's wait after finishing fertility treatment before looking into adoption seriously.

All the best to everyone

Jenny
 

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Hi Girls.

Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee a new home, Thanks Karen for all your hard work. ^xmas2^ your a star.

Hi HHH, so glad things are starting to move along for you now. It will be great to share your journey to becoming a mummy with you. ^storkgirl^

Fiona1. In my exp, most LA's do like you to have given up on IVF etc for between 6 and 12 months. The best thing to do is phone around as many LA's etc as you can to find out there policys to see which one has the shortest waiting time, you can apply to any with about a 50 mile radius of your home. Also things can move fairly fast if you are lucky. The adpotion bill of 2002 says that people should be approved within 9 months of first contacting an LA. I think this has to be inplace across the Uk by next year 2006 and I know my LA did work to those time scales. So good Luck. But the post aproval wait can be anything from weeks, to months to years :eek: bit like how long is a piece of string!!!!!!!!!!!

No news from me yet. My SW is on holiday this week, but we do have this cosortuim day to keep us focused on the 26th of April.
Oh, also bought paint for the nursey today, it is a lilac colour called Rodeo drive ;D ;D ;D

Ever, things are looking really good for you buddy, she sounds like a real sweety, 18/12 what a great age. Will be looking out for your updates.

Better go to sleep as it is late, but just needed my daily fix of FF

Night Night Mandyxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 

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MSw,

Thanks for your reply, We live in Guernsey so sadly cannot "shop around" different LA's. Phoned up today and the adoption officer is off sick for a month....not a great start. I hope they don't make us wait to start the process. We finish IVF in May and want to start straight away on the adoption assessment. What they need to know is that we have been looking into this for 2 years so it's not a rash decision and something we have to come to terms with.

Will keep you all informed with our progress.

Does anyone know how supportive LA's are of overseas adoption. We are thinking of going to Russia but don't know if they will be less willing to assess us. We are expecting to have to pay for the assessment anyway so that shouldn't make a difference.

Thanks again to you all for your answers

Fiona
 

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Hi Ladies

I hope that this message finds you all well.  Whilst I have not actively posted over the last few months, I have continued to follow everyone's progress.  It has been so educational and inspiring reading everyone's stories.  Many Many Congratulations to all of the new mums and dads out there, I hope that your little ones are well.  Good luck also to everyone else currently going through or looking to go through the process.

Karen, I have attempted below a short update on our position to help keep your records up to  date.

After making initial contact with our agency last September, we completed prepare to care andlodged our application in March.  We have now had our furst home study meeting and are scheduled I beleieve for panel in June.  We are very excited about how quick the agency intends to process our application.

We are hoping to go for either 2/3 children between the ages of 0-5/6.

As we are reletively new to everything, coud any one confirm if we are supposed to have our house fully ready for the arrival of rospective children when we go to panel.  I ask this question as I would feel odd kitting out bedrooms/the house etc prior to actually knowing if we were approved or not.  When have other postees started to prepare the house etc?

We would really appreciate some advice.

Best wishes to you all


Nicola
 

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Hi,

Fiona, you are probably in a unique situation out there in Guernsey. Over here on the main land it doesn't seem to be the LAs that do the assessments for foreign adoptions. When we first enquired it was an independent (ex-social worker) agency who did them. But Guernsey might very well be different.

I could be very wrong on this, and it might have been only the opinion of our SW but I got the distinct feeling that LAs dissapprove of foreign adoptions.....but easiest thing is to ask them. I think the thinking is that children grow up with a better sense of identity if they grow up in their country of origin.....even if it's in an orphanage.

As for open adoptions....you'll learn a lot about them when you do your prep course. You can make a judgement then yourself if you think it's a good thing or not. I think under the right sort of circumstances it can be very positive for the children involved. Maybe not so obviously at the time it happens but for later years when they want to know more about their history........but this is all just theory in my head.......still waiting to put it into practise!

Nicola, we're going to panel on june 2nd....and will probably be in the middle of building an extension on our house at that time. It's due to be finished by end of the summer. So, kitting out for kids will definately not be done by then. Our Sw thought that there's at least a 3 month wait after panel...even if they have a match in mind you still have to wait for further approval and meeting s etc, so don't worry about it. We're waiting till we have a better idea of when/who/howmany/ etc....

Mandy good luck for your consortium day.......which are the counties that are included?

better go do some work I suppose.......thanx Karen for the updates....how do you find the time!!

XXRuth.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Hi Girls

Going to try and do a quick post now that I have two sleeping (and teething) little girls, hopefully they won't wake so I can get my fix.  Doesn't help as I've got a cold too, so a really crabby household here!

Ever - your little girl sounds lovely.  I know how luck y I was to go through this part of the process relatively unscathed but there have been couples turned down by panel in our area, so I'd keep in self preservation mode.  Sending lots of postive thoughts to you ^reiki^

Fiona - most LA's get you to wait 6 months between treatment and starting the process just ot be sure you've got it out of your system.  In terms of contact, both Dh and I couldn't go through with face to face, we have twice yearly post box contact with the girl's BP's including a photo once a year.  The Reviewing and Assessing Officer thought they might not reply and wanted it like a quid pro quo arrangement where if they didn't reply we wouldn't send anything either, but we said no to that, even if they don't reply we will keep to the deal, we don't want the girls resenting us in later life for being petty.

Mandy - good luck for 26th April.  What do they do at these consortium days, is it when the share what they have on their books those that they can't place in their own areas?

Ruth - good luck with the house extension.

Nicky - hope June's panel date comes through for you.

HHH - welcome to the crew, I'll add you to the next list.

Right off to scour the rest of the boards.

Bye for now
Love
Karen x
 

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Hi Nicky

good luck with your journey - sounds like we may be panneling together ;D - we have been advised that we will go to panel in June too!

good luck with your home visits my dh and i have really enjoyed our visits with SW - its like a trip down memory lane!

We are also hoping for siblings between the ages of 2-6.

LB
X
 

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My little angel (NOT!) is finally down for his nap so I thought I'd have a quick pop on-line.

Ever, congratulations on the news of your little girl, she sounds gourgeous.  I think you're right to keep in self preservation mode, unfortunately the only time you know you're relatively safe is when the child comes home with you (and I don't think you're ever totally ready but it's worth it  :)).  Hopefully the next few weeks will go quickly and not seem too unbearable, it must be nice to get a video, we only ever saw a photo. 

Fiona, welcome to the board, unfortunately most agencies insist on a post tx waiting period to ensure that you're fully over the failure of the tx before you tackle the stress of the adoption process.  I know what you mean about being ready to move on, we always had adoption in our minds as an option if the IVF had failed and because we weren't getting any younger didn't want to hang around.  Unfortunately the whole adoption process can often take time because it's often a case of the right child being available at the right time which can be a matter of luck as much as anything else.  We were lucky with our little boy because there were no other suitable adopters in our area but sometimes there can be more than one possible set of parents for a child, especially a baby (which is any child under 2).  All I can suggest is that you contact your local agencies and try and get as much information as you can.  As for the open adoption question, contact can vary from none to face to face visits.  Often it is what they call a postbox contact where you post a non-addressed letter to a Social Services postbox and they forward it on to birth parents and send you any replies.  You can only agree to what you feel comfortable with.  We have an annual postbox agreement with XXXXX's birth mum which we are happy to do.

Mandy, good luck with the consortium day, let's hope they find you the perfect match.  Fingers crossed for you.  I must admit I was surprised by the description Rodeo Drive for lilac, are you sure there aren't any sparkly bits mixed up with the paint  ;D ;D ;D  Happy decorating.

Ruth, I don't think it's just a case of the authorities thinking that a child should be brought up in their own country, I think it's also that there are so many children in this UK that the agencies feel keener to get their children placed first.  Good luck with the extension.

Nicky, a June panel sounds good, hope the home assessment goes well.  As for preparation, we did not decorating/shopping until we were officially matched with XXXXX.  We decided that when you are approved for 0-5 yr olds there can be a big difference on what you need for a 1 year old to what you need for a 5 year old.  Also we didn't know at the time whether we would have 1 or 2 children and therefore which room to decorate!! 
Obviously when we were matched it was fairly frantic  ;D ;D

HHH fingers crossed you do get on the June course.

Karen, Ruth is right how do you find the time to keep everyone updated with 2 children.  I find the 1 hectic enough  ;D  Sorry to hear you have a cold, I know how miserable it can be especially if you have 2 crabby teething children as well.  Hope you get better soon.

Our honeymoon period is definitely over.  XXXXX has settled in really well and so has decided that he wants to start imposing his own rules, like not lying down on the changing mat to have his nappy change.  Average change time has now gone up from 5 mins to 20 mins as he is too strong for me to hold with one hand.  You know you're a mother when you are chasing an escaping naked child around the bathroom with a large piece of poo on his bottom.  I bet you can't wait to join in the fun girls  ;D ;D ;D
I would like to point out that this is offset by when he gives me a cuddle or when he's asleep in his cot looking like a little angel.  General rule of thumb, when they are awake you might sometimes wish you could put them to bed and when they're in bed you might wish you could pick them up.

We're off to spend the weekend with my parents.  I've suddenly become more popular with my family and they can't wait to see me or is it somebody with me?  ;)

Hope everyone has a great Easter

love
Cindy



 

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Hi Cindy

Motherhood sounds fab ;D ;D ;D poohy bottoms and all. Will let you know if rodeo drive is a cool as it sounds!!!!!!!!!!!!

My latest new is we have finally revieved our approval in black and white, the letter arrived yeatseday, so another piece of paper for the scrap book :)

Spent the day cleaning as a bottle of mulled wine left over from xmas decided to explode all over the kitchen last night :( :( grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. I think the moral of this tale is drink alcohol as soon as you get it ;D

Been out tonight with our frineds for tea and definatly not stuck to Weight watchers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but have lost 1/2 a stone this month.

Currently our SW is on holiday as i am sure many of them are, and our form f will have just landed on their desk, so roll on 26th of April when we will meet all the SW from the consortium and hopefully they will see us as a potential match.

Have a good Easter.

Mandyx
 

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;D Hi Mandy

Well done on your 1/2stone!!! Balls to dieting over easter - any extra pounds you gain with the chocolate eggs surely will be worked off with all that running around you're going to be doing - after your child, I mean!! Good luck with the consortium, keeping fingers crossed that something comes up for you very soon.
I know how frustrating it is when our sw's are all on holiday (how dare they?!!). I rang SS in the week to try to get some reassurance from someone in the absence of our SW - nobody there to take my call :eek: And there was me thinking Easter was a 3/4 day event! Silly me!

Have a good Easter - hoping this will be our last as non-mums!! Roll on the days when we're all too busy making easter buns and decorating eggs to hide. to come on this forum!

Happy Easter to everyone! :)
 

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Hi Ladies....

Well I have just got back from a 6 day camping trip with my 3 nephews and Niece in the New Forest...and had a fab time, although a little bit too chilly at night!....

Anyway our news is that on 21st March we were approved at panel!!!!!!!!!!!!.......

The Legal chap was sitting in on our panel and they had already agreed before we went in and didnt even have to ask any questions!...so here we are hoping that the next call we get will be about a possible match but have been warned that we face around 12-18month wait so we have been told to get on with our lives....which we plan to make the most of!!...

I havent had a chance to catch up on previous posts so will do so over the next few days..

Karen- Would appreciate you cahnging my details on the next update...something I thought was never going to happen!!

Love Natsxxx
 

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Crazy

Many congratulations on your recent panel approval

Nicky
 

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Crazy - huge congratulations to you  ;D  Glad you had a nice time camping and yes I am sure it was cold at night - rather you than me as I was tucked up in my nice warm bed  ;D

All the best to everyone

Jenny
 

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Hi everybody,
There is always so much to catch up on when I manage to get on here now.

Ever:  congratulations, your little girl sounds lovely, really hope all goes well.

Crazy:  congratulations on being matched.

Sorry I can't reply to everybody personally!

Our news is just continuing with home study and doing loads of reading (well I am, husband is less keen!).  We have had 4 visits and are doing prep course in a couple of weeks.  Had a fair amount of homework.  This weeks we have to write our family profile.  Feels a bit daunting as she said to think of it as selling ourselves to a child's sw. 

My husband is feeling a bit unkeen about the prep course, as he is not too keen on the role playing idea etc.  Did anybody else have this (and then can hopefulyl tell me that their husband found it a lot better than they were expecting!).

Good luck to everybody,

Love
Judith
xxx
 

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hey ladies

i hope you dont me posting-me and my husband are now thinking long and hard about adoption-at the weekend my mother in law came out with the strangest thing-she said she would love any child we had thru adoption no differant then as if it was our on biological child-reason it was strange was we have never told her we are thinking of this route!

a little info about me- we have been ttc for way to long as you can tell by our ticker(not  sure if the ticker is a good thing or bad!!) sadly no luck yet-my dh is fine however i suffer really badly with pcos-we have done 6 cycles of clomid and i didnt respond to any of them and we have just tryed to do an iui cycle however i didnt respond to drug at all and we found out today that after us waiting 9months on waitlist for iui it looks like we will have to go on bottom of waitlist for ivf as our consultant thinks that if he ups the drugs i will over respond-to be totally honest we both want out of this whole IF treatment thing.

we are moving over the next few months back to the north east of england and are gonna spend this time saving for a private ivf attemp however while we save we are gonna spend this time thinking if we can out ourselves thru this or if we wanna spend the money towards adoption

i have been watching this thread for a while and it makes me feel positive when i saw both bex and karen start there family

i hope i have made sense and not board any of you and would welcome any thoughts or info

thanks

Mez
xxxx


 
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