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Mac78- Did you decide what to do about the Prostap injection? Are you doing a mock cycle for OE or DE?

MSJ - I have had a scratch in the past. I didn’t get pregnant on that IVF cycle, but I did on the next one, which was about 3 months later. Too be honest it was so long afterwards I don’t think it made any difference. I hear what you’re saying about trying to get your mojo back, I’m in a bit of a slump at the moment.

Afm - Despite not taking any luteal support after this failed IVF cycle there is no sign of af. I’m a bit confused about this as I would have thought no egg means no corpus luteum. Anyway, I’m plodding on and I’m trying to think of things I could do to improve my final round. My sleep is really disturbed at the moment so I’ve started taking melatonin to try and get into a good sleep cycle. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that it’ll help. I’m trying to get back into reflexology to help reduce my anxiety, but my reflexologist has cancelled my appointment at the last minute and the next available one isn’t for another two weeks, which is really frustrating. I’ve looked around for alternative practitioners, but they’re either too far away or don’t seem to be open in the evenings (I just can’t take the time off work at the moment). So I’m going to have to just stick with weekly yoga and try and take some nice long walks when the weather is nice. DH and I had a long chat about DE recently. I feel we’re at a bit of a stale mate. He doesn’t want to make the decision until we have used up our frosties, but I need to have a safety net if all else fails. This journey has just been so long and it’s getting harder.
 

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Hi Ladies,

Would you mind if I joined you?

Babyhopeful - sorry you're having a difficult time of it :( The decision to go down the DE route is a hard one which is very personal to each set of circumstances. But, I'm like you in the fact that I need to have a plan of what happens next if the avenue I'm currently pursuing doesn't work. I don't know if it's the same for you, but it almost feels like it's a bit of pressure taken off knowing that I have a plan for the next step should all fail. But I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you! xx

MSJ - Unfortunately I can't be of much help, but enjoy your holiday and whatever you decide I'll keep my fingers crossed for you! xx

Mac78 - Sorry you're on this never-ending ride! What does a mock cycle do if you don't mind me asking? xx

Emsy81 - If it's any consolation I'd be happy with an AMH of 1.5 right now! :) 0.44 leaves me in a constant panic that there's going to be nothing to retrieve when I start my cycle and go for Egg collection! Good luck TTC naturally! xx

katkat2014 - Thanks for your wise words xx

AFM, As you can see from my signature, I'm single and have a very low AMH and AFC. I would love to be a mum and am happy to go it solo.

This will be my first round of IVF with DS so I suppose it's my discovery to understand how my body reacts to the drugs etc. I've been put on short protocol. My AF finally arrived yesterday (after a few false starts) so I should be good to get my remaining blood tests tomorrow - including FSH - and then begin my cycle at my next AF in March.

I'm under no illusions that it'll work first time (or second or third) as my prognosis is only 6% chance with 1 egg, but there's always a sliver of hope!  ^pray^

I'm willing the days away like crazy at the moment - with a month to go still! - and I'm trying to get something planned in for each week which allows me to break up the waiting a little.

This week I have my bloods, the next week my Nurse consultation - after which I can buy my meds. Oddly enough, they are cheapest at the Lister (my treatment hospital) by far. Fertility2U were about the same but from everything I'd read I was surprised the clinic was cheapest.

Now I just need to find another couple of milestones for the two following weeks after which my next cycle should be here!


xxx
 

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Hi everyone,

How is everyone doing? Is anyone doing a transfer this month?

MSJ; glad to hear your embryo is at ARGC and I know how hard is to wait for an appointment for a vaccination. So when are you going to Nepal? It's hard to say from outside but if you can afford financially maybe is better to focus on trying naturally then go straight for a transfer if it doesn't happen. When I first got pregnant, this was literally 3 months after I was told I had 0 chance of getting pregnant naturally, it was the month after I came back from an amazing holiday in the Maldives. On my case, the egg quality wasn't there but your case can be different? if you can afford to do so, why not?

BroodySingle; welcome and wishing you the best of luck, strength, and faith for this cycle. I am doing a treatment with donor egg and the mock cycle is a stimulation just to be able to know how my lining, and I suppose my body, will respond to the medication on the actual cycle.

Not much to report from me; 2 more days until I stop with all the medication and then patiently wait for the AF ^pray^. One thing I am worried about is drinking wine. Is not that a drink a lot, but I do work in the wine industry and I will have to take clients to a wine a trip next week, most of the time I will be spitting out but when having dinner with winemakers would be rude not to drink anything. I have not given up alcohol since I started tcc, but I have certainly cut it down to 1 gls a week and sometimes none at all. Most of the time is because of work and I feel really guilty after that. :(

 

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Hi all,

How is everyone getting on?

Mac - Sorry you're feeling guilty, but I honestly don't think you need to! I'd be surprised if the odd glass here and there really makes a massive difference. Are you able to stick to a small glass of red which has at least some other health benefits too?

I think sometimes we stress ourselves out so much with all the things we should or shouldn't be doing that we actually do more harm than good so please try not to stress :)

Enjoy the meal and worst case, if you really want to abstain completely just say you're on antibiotics that can't be mixed with alcohol  ;D

AFM, just waiting impatiently for my next AF - which won't be for just under a month  :( - so I can start my first cycle. I'm trying to find something nice to do each week between then so that I have shorter milestones to meet to pass the time more quickly. I doubt it'll work but it's worth a try.

xxx
 

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Katkat - I just wanted to respond to your concerns about high ALT. I had this towards them end of my pregnancy. I was referred for a liver scan but by the time I got the date for the scan I had given birth and they no longer felt the risk was there. I didn’t have any other symptoms. This was one of many, slightly on the wrong side of borderline, results that I had that eventually led to me being induced at 37 weeks but the main one for me was that the baby’s growth seemed to stop at 37 weeks. As far as I’m aware there haven’t been any long term implications of high ALT levels. It might be worth asking about a liver scan.

I hope things are going well for you at the moment.

 

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Hi broodysingle and welcome! The wait was almost the worst for me, I'd rather get on with things regardless of the outcome. Good plan to have things scheduled in to speed up time!

Mac, don't worry about the wine. And making up you're on antibiotics every once in a while could be a good idea if it's getting too much. But the odd glass really doesn't matter at all. Or just say you've been drinking too much recently and want to give if a bit of a break, then had just a couple of sips.

Babyhopeful, any sign of AF? I was in the same situation, I needed a plan B and DH wasn't up for talking about DE or taking it seriously. But he came round with time and whilst we have never properly taken it up he'd eventually agreed that this would be our plan B If all fails. It took a while.to get to this point but right now before our last cycle we had a couple of DE consultations which really helped to get our (his) heads around it. That was before and even during transferring the last embryo and helped us both a lot.

Msj, I have had so many scratches and I would say unless someone found something drastic then I am not really sure if there is a need for this. For example if you have a really low level of uterine nk cells then it could be worth it.
Regarding monitoring early, i know that if you've had miscarriages they will do so (i didn't really). Otherwise it's just the normal thing is the 10 week dating appointment with the NHS followed by the 12 week scan, then 20 weeks scan and some midwife appointments and that's it. As I am over 40 years old and did VF they monitor me more closely now but only from now (week 28/29). So you have add. growths scans and consultant appointments plus your regular MW apps. every 3-4 weeks. You get free general prescriptions as soon as you are pregnant, you just need to get a form from the GP. I've heard from some that for example if you needed clexane you will get it prescribed, but typically later on. I didn't apparently need it even though I had used it for most of my IVf cycles for better blood flow. Taking aspirin only since 16 weeks.

Hey rocket, how's Bethany and how are you? That's so interesting about the ALT and I also totally forgot you were induced earlier. The good thing is, it's suddenly totally in the normal range for me. So ALT were high for a few weeks and the last 2 results came back normal..my awful itching that I've had since Christmas has almost disappeared too (I did have some kind of different thing though, a rash which I think may be PUPP which comes and goes). So now am no longer monitored for cholestasis thankfully! Also baby measured quite large today (29 weeks) which is weird as as ok the small side, then average around week 25 and now ahead by a week. it's all still totally surreal but i love feeling the baby move, it's amazing and something I am sure everyone on here will get to experience eventually. Just need to keep my fingers crossed for a bit longer
 

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Hi ladies,

It's been a while!

How are you all getting on?

kitkat - thanks for the welcome! :) I still have at least 3 weeks to go...although I'm worrying it may be longer as my consultant put me on Levothyroxcin as my thyroid is slightly elevated and it's played havoc with my cycle. Spotted for 7 days before AF (although spotting started when AF was due) and then spotted for 8 days after AF!

Mac - how are you doing? Have you had the work event yet?

Babyhopeful - has AF arrived?

MSJ - any further on the decisions?

Emsy - how are you doing? I only found out my levels just under a month ago. I've gone crazy planning and getting my treatment started since as otherwise I really would go crazy!

AFM, I had my nurse consultation today...I'm sure she thought I was a right ditz...especially when I asked if I would be shown how to prepare my meds again before my treatment cycle. She looked at me like I was absolutely barmy! It doesn't help that I don't think she was very impressed when I tried it myself and seemed to epically fail at getting the liquid into the needle.  ^idiot^

Hoping you're all well.

xxx
 

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Hi all,

Is anyone doing a transfer in the next 3 weeks? I can't believe I am saying this, but I am finally cycling for a transfer soon. I am so anxious and overwhelmed, hoping our donor gives us healthy eggs and hoping they make to the blastocyst stage. This is the moment I have been waiting for and planning and now is finally happening. I just don't get why it feels like someone is squeezing my heart right now. I don't have any doubt that I want to be a mother and I am trying wherever it takes to make it happen, but suddenly I have been questioning everything in my life, from my career to my marriage and even contemplating what a crazy thing to have a child at 42 years old. I  really don't know what is happening.
Has anyone felt the same way just before ET?
 

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Broodysingle - Welcome! Yes I’m similar in that I feel less pressure if the next steps are clear. I hope you’re getting on okay with the medication. I’m wishing you lots of luck for this cycle x

Mac78 - I do have the odd glass of red wine in between cycles just so I can feel a bit more normal! I’ve been ttc for so long now that I would have gone mad by now if I didn’t let my hair down once in a while. I’m sorry to hear that you are feeling anxious about the next few weeks. I too have questioned everything from my marriage to the meaning of life in between cycles, but once a cycle starts my worries seem to fade away and I just get on with the task ahead. I think it’s good to question things and reassess once in a while rather than blindly continue on this journey. I hope your feelings will settle once the donor round starts. As for your age, I keep reminding myself that if women can have periods into their 40s or even 50s then Mother Nature still intended for our age group to have babies. I’m perhaps a bit more tired than I was in my 20s, but I still think I have the energy and patience to look after a child. In fact at 40 I’m infinitely more patient than I was at 20.

Katkat - I hope you are doing well? I think a few donor egg consultations would help DH to feel more positively about it. It may come down to cost in the end, as financially it may make more sense to use DEs in our cycles.

Afm - AF arrived 4 days early, it was fairly heavy, which is normal for me after IVF, but it lasted only 5 days rather than my usual 7. I started getting high readings on ovulation tests from day 9 to 13. Then during the afternoon of day 13 I started bleeding, it was more than spotting, but less than af. I contacted the clinic and they said things should settle down, but contact them if things get worse. The spotting has eased off slightly, but it’s been going on for 6 days now. It’s so frustrating, I have no idea where I am with my cycle and we didn’t even get a chance to try naturally this month. I’m hoping this is just some kind of weird bounce back with my hormones after being over suppressed on the suprecur/burselin. Has anyone else experienced anything like this before?

DH and I had a fairly positive appointment with our consultant. We are not using suprecur/burselin again. Instead I’m going to use stims from day 3 then introduce cetrotide later on to prevent early ovulation. I have had runaway follicles with this protocol in the past, but the clinic are going to give me a split dose of stims with half in the morning and half in the evening. The consultant would like to see me batch at least one more embryo to give me a fighting chance of a healthy pregnancy. I’m keeping everything crossed that my body settles down and behaves as it should. The consultant also suggested that a couple of rounds of IUI with stims could be a plan b rather than straight to DE. We know we can achieve fertilisation and implantation, so it’s just a matter of finding that lucky egg, although this is dependent on my body behaving. I am still fearful that things have declined to a point where I’m just not going to respond anymore.
 

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Mac, I think its fairly normal to question things, the whole process is full of so many huge decisions and I don’t think anyone can really understand what they would do until they are in that position. I know I was constantly doubting everything. Wishing you so much luck.

Babyhopeful, it sounds really positive that your clinic have changed your protocol a bit. On my last fresh cycle none of our embryos made it to day 5 (it was actually our worst cycle with Create) but thankfully we had a few frozen embryos which we were able to transfer and as you know gave me my daughter. I put it down to having a bad cold during stims that the embryos didn’t make it, but who really knows, but I just wanted to say that just because you had one bad round it doesn’t mean the next will be. Also, if it did come to the worst and you didn’t get any fresh embryos this time, would you be able to pop back in one of your frozen? I’m exactly the same about needing a back up plan. I was even like this during the start of my pregnancy, I think for me it was just a way of trying to protect myself.

Katkat, so pleased all is well, when is your due date?

xxx
 

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Sunshine122 - It’s lovely to hear from you. I hope you’re enjoying life as a new Mum? I had flu over Christmas and had only just started feeling better when I started having my treatment in January, so this may have been a factor in my rubbish round. DH was convinced we wouldn’t be going ahead as I had been so ill. We were pleasantly surprised when we saw 5 afc, but even then DH thought I should give myself another month to recover, but I pushed ahead. Thankfully he didn’t say ‘I told you so’ when it all went wrong as he could see how miserable I was about it all. If we don’t get any fresh embryos next time, I’m going to give my body a month or two to recover from the drugs then start transferring xx
 

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Hi all,

Thank you Sunshine & Babyhopeful for the support.

Unfornutaley, I am still very confused and considering cancelling the Transfer this month as DH and I are not in good synchronization right now. I don't know if  I am expecting too much from him, but organizing the time for both of us to be in Alicante has been much more stressful than I anticipated. I wish he would say less of "when do you want to there" and instead  "I want to make sure I am there". He was happy to go first to provide the sperm and I will stay alone to for the TF, which I am sure I will be fine and I won't need anyone to baby seat me, but is the whole emotional process and the wanting to be together to somehow feel a bit more like a "normal conceiving". When I tried to explain this to him this morning and said how much I wish he would be more into the details of the treatment, instead of me telling him all the time what we need to do and when his answer was, you have no idea how much stress I am under with work and trying to this at the same time. It is the same for me as I also have a job, plus dealing with taking medication all the emotions of going through this treatment. His answer was but is not like you have the responsibility to provide, because he earns much more than I do and all the money we are saving to buy a house comes from his salary. But is not like I don't help at all, I don't earn as much as him but all I earn is dedicated to us and our plans, such as paying for half of the treatment which isn't not easy.
I am not sure if this is the right way to bring a child into the world with all this feeling bottled up.
Does anyone know what is the success rate for a frozen egg? I am seriously considering asking Alicante to freeze the eggs collected from my donor and wait another month or 2, at least until we can talk things through.
I really don't know have anyone else to ask so any advice you be hugely appreciated.

Lots of love to you all.
x
 

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Hey Mac, I'm sorry you are going through a rough patch...since you asked, I hope it's okay and maybe even helps to hear my opinion.
This is all an incredibly stressful challenging situation for all of us and our boys too. Men are wired a bit differently and to be honest in my opinion it sounds like your guy is really trying to do the best he can. I would suspect he is bottling quite a bit up too and it makes him so unhappy to see you have to go through this and not be able to protect you. They definitely take this all personally as well, no matter where the medical issue is. I think every guy deep down feels he should have super swimmers that save the day. Yes, the appointments, the jobs, the travel it is all so so challenging, it is, for both of you. I think boys revert back to the basics, the bare plans, the obeying of the doctor's orders without question and switching off otherwise. They really don't seem to have the need to research themselves, communicate with others going through a similar situation or talk much about it with us.
I think your guy sounds like a definite keeper, he is committed to you and to the cause and when you talked to him in the morning he actually had the maturity to give you quite a good explanation of where his head is at. So many morons out there would twist things, attack you instead or simply shut down. I think this is going to be one lucky and loved child by both mature parents that clearly wanted it so badly. This IS the right way to bring a child into the world. You obviously are also amazing Mac, you have been through so much and are just trying to do your best to navigate this minefield.  I totally understand you wanting him there, I would too.

The Lister Clinic told me fresh eggs have a slight edge to frozen, but it's really not much, like maybe 5%. I wouldn't base my decision on this.

Will it be less stressful for your DH in a month or two? Then maybe it's worth postponing if you both want to make it a special positive trip where the two of you can connect. Do you think he is capable of that, does he want that too? If not, I really think that's okay, this is such a painful frustrating topic, it makes some of us and especially the men just want to blank it out.
To be entirely honest, I would forge through, but that's just me... I find none of this fun, I don't want to make it a holiday, it is so far from a natural conception it's a different beast, I want to be pregnant with a healthy baby...that's my goal, I want to get it over with, the rest is just background noise. I'm not sure how healthy this approach is either  :) but at the end of the day, we still are who we are, even in all this.
I work in the hospital and see so much real tragedy daily. We are all still so so lucky for what we have. Time is short although there is also no real hurry either with DE. This is the guy you fell in love with and who clearly loves you, make it about the two of you, not the child. If one of you were fatally ill tomorrow, what would you wish you had done? Hug each other, love and communicate with each other, be kind and listen and reassure each other, be there for each other. You WILL have a baby, you will ... but the two of you need to come first, you are the team, that's the best family a baby can have. Start doing that now no matter what you decide, the rest will fall into place. How do the two of you want to write this little bit of history? There is no right or wrong... what can you find that you both agree on, if you really can't agree, there is absolutely nothing wrong in just getting it over with.
Good luck Mac!
 

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Saltysea what a very beautiful, encouraging, amazing post! This is really helpful to many of us and I hope Mac that it helped you a little too. A quick add on, if you can then try and freeze the embryos and not the eggs as chances are way higher with frozen embryos. Then you can go together for transfer when you're more 'synchronised'. I am unsure if your husband has frozen his sperm there in the past but if not then it may be far less stressful if he went alone and leave the sperm and then afterwards make the transfer extra special and a mini holiday together. I'm a bit like saltysea in that I felt far more relaxed to do to all on my own..what counted more for me was that my partner was there for.me during the 2ww, the bfns and bfp.

Men are just wired in a different way, more focussed on practical things and not as emotional, or at least they tend to not show emotions as much. I am sure your husband cares very much. Being the provider is one of the things he probably feels he can control, whilst this entire IVF thing is kind of left to the women to sort out. In fact it's the pregnancy as well (I am currently the one nesting, buying and organising things. At first I was annoyed about it. But my partner actually contributes in a different way - he is really caring, does all the other practical stuff like cleaning and cooking, worries about me - and once a week he googles and reads out to me about the development of the baby out of his own accord ;D then occasionally he comes out with random pieces of knowledge about babies i am really surprised about so secretly he must be reading up.or talking to people about it. I just stopped bothering him as he clearly does the pregnancy thing in a totally different way to me). Mac you will find your way. I also think your husband is a keeper!

Sunshine how are you? Due date 03 May, but due to my age and IVf they may induce me a week early if she stays in that long. Just 11 weeks to go! Gulp  ;D she's breech at the moment so we'll see how that goes.
 

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Thank you Katkat  :), that's really sweet of you. Also of course you are absolutely right - thank you for the correction - fresh embryos only have a slight edge to frozen embryos. Frozen eggs are definitely significantly less successful than frozen/fresh embryos. I would insist that he deposits the sperm some time before or on the day of egg collection. If the sperm is frozen or fresh doesn't seem to matter that much either so if it's easier, it's okay to do it at a time that is less stressful and just have it frozen for use later. So much for little miss I'm-a-Health-Professional - mixing up eggs with embryos, haha. 
 

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Hi all,

Just a quick note to say thank you to Saltysea and Katka. Last week was very emotional indeed and your messages really helped me to stay focus and find my balance again. In the end, DH came to the conclusion by himself that he should have planned better to make sure that he is by my side on the transfer day. He had to move things around with work and he's been working remotely, while we are Spain, and for the first time, we managed to go for a run together yesterday. We both feel more relaxed this week, I went for a run by myself this morning and spent the afternoon reading on the beach and only when a friend sent me a support message before dinner I realized that I hadn't thought about the treatment the whole day. Tomorrow is the appointment before transfer and I hope we can get all covered.
Does anyone have any thoughts on prophylactic antibiotics to improve embryo transfer?
I noticed that my cervical mucus is ever more intense lately, should we ask  Dr Castillo if he will remove the mucus prior to the transfer? I have read different opinions about it and I am not sure what to think of it.

Hugs to everyone.
x

 

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Hi all,

The transfer went well and I can't faulty IB Alicante as Dr Castillo and his team were amazing. I felt relaxed the whole time and really felt like every single person cared about us. Now, it's the waiting game which I know is not going to be easy :(
However, I am conscious that I have done all I could physically and mentally to prepare myself to receive this beautiful embryo; we got 7 AA embryos out of 7 eggs fertilized and Dr Castillo said this was one their best outcome, so now we have 6 frozen.
I am not sure if this is because of the extra dose of progesterone but I am feeling hungry all the time since I left the clinic!
Any recommendations for the two weeks wait?
^hugme^
 

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I am so glad it all worked out so well for you, Mac! The numbers are so much in your favour now, your luck in this department is definitely going to take a turn for the better and it's fantastic you and your man could make it a positive experience! Wishing you loads and loads of luck and serenity :) for the next few days!
 

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Awww amazing news Mac, I am so pleased for you! That's a fantastic outcome, have rarely heard of such fantastic numbers/ stats. Hope you're a bit more relaxed now. What kind of tips were you thinking of? If you don't know how you absorb progesterone I'd probably test it 7 days after transfer just to make sure all good. Then again when you do your bhcg
 

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Mac78 - I’m really pleased that you sorted everything with DH and went ahead with the transfer. It sounds like things have worked out beautifully with 6 embryos in the freezer. I’ve taken selenium in my 2ww and tried to relax as much as possible, although this is easier said than done! Overall apart from taking the medication prescribed at the correct times I think we probably have little control over the outcome, so don’t beat yourself up about things you should or shouldn’t be doing. I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you xx
 
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