A very quick hello before I head off to work today. Should really be on my way already.
Allie - fab news love. I am so pleased for you and will be following your progress. Here's to a happy healthy one.
Jules - have a great hol. Like the girls have all said - try and keep us updated.
A quick moan from me as I am on a total downer at the moment. I'm finding Jay to be a real [email protected]@rd at the moment. Now I'm earning and am working 22 1/2 hours a week, it just doesn't seem enough to make him happy. I seem to be constantly doing washing, ironing, cleaning, shopping as well as working and my fave job, being with Jessica. He says things when he goes to work in the morning like have a good HALF DAY at work. Yesterday, I had some Man U work on the side in the afternoon and I went to a friends after that for an hour. As a result, I didn't sit down til gone 9pm last night. I don't even think he noticed how many times I was up and down the stairs and at the washer and the sink.
I hate to say it, but I think our relationship has really detriorated in the past year. Don't get me wrong, he would never change Jessica for the world but I never gave up hope where he had resigned himself to the fact we were never going to have children. i just feel really icolated. I'm always down at this time of year as we're usually (well, every other year) in Australia now with my family. So often with his family I just feel like a guest on the outskirts of things.
Maybe I'm being silly.....we've both been worried lately with Jessica being poorley and I supposed we're both tired too. Someone asked me at work yesterday how Jessica was baring up with her latest bout of snot and temperature and stuff and I just started to cry. Great psychiatric nurse I am,eh??
well, I'm off to earn my part of the crust - sorry this is a me one but I had to get that off my chest so I don't end up in tears again today.....I've got a Doctors clinic to run.
Just a quickie post from me today, got lots of stuff to do today, and get all my christmas cards posted. Typical I have had them written for ages, but I will end up forgetting to post them!!!
Well Anthony has his nursery's Christmas party tomorrow and then Alan's work has a Xmas party, its all go!!!
Anthonys seems be sleeping a little better, still wakening up once or twice, but I just give him some teething powder and he seems to settle again.
Jule- Have a great xmas and enjoy Canada. Wrap up well, it sounds absolutely freezing there. Well it will put you in the Christmas spirit.
Angie - Sorry to hear things are a bit hard just now. Men just dont understand how hard it is for us women doing everything round the house and being a mum too. Just ignore him, thats what I do with Alan. lol
Allik- Congratulations I hope you have a great 9 months ahead.
Hello to everyone else sorry I have now forgotten what I was going to write now!!!! Lost my train of thought, which isnt hard for me at the moment!!!!
Hi girls I don't normally come on here, but I was just having a quick scan and Ange's post really hit home with me.
I haven't gone back to work yet but to be honest just looking after 10wk old twins with all the feeding ,nappies , bottles, washing and ironing ect ect, it fills up my day.
Then Hubby comes home (and he's on 8am till 4pm at the moment) and wants shirts ironed, tea cooked, and so I can do this he will look after the boys for 1 hr an evening! I might be being abit harsh but I think thats not enough, 1hr when you haven't seen them all day and he does nothing when he gets home I tried talking to him last night and he said he would make dinner AND look after the boys , like I was making a fuss. He decided he would do hot dogs (in a tin). I popped on the computer and tried to relax even though the boys were screaming ( I did want to go down to them but I didn't want to make this easy for him, I wanted him to see how hard it is)
Anyway when down stairs abit later to find him watching t.v , no dinner cooked (making hotdogs are hardly what I would call cooking )
I went mad, he said he couldn't find them, I opened the cupboard they were staring right at me why the hell didn't he ask me where they were?? no instead he just leaves it until mugg-inns does it for him.
I don't understand it , after waiting so long for this to happen and wishing we had a family , why isn't he more into the boys , it makes no sense.
I went to a mummy get together with some of the people I met in hossie and they went on about how lovely their hubbies were, looking after baby as soon as they get in , helping with dinner, bathing ect ect., I was so embarrassed about the way hubby is that I lied and made out he does loads of things too.
I'm sorry that your having a stressful time Ange, but I'm really glad you've shared it on here as I was wrorried that my hubby was a bit weird after speaking to those mum's yesterday.
Hope things improve, if you can give me any tips to getting my hubby to shift his and do more then please please pass them on.
Men dont realise how much you are running around caring for a baby they still expect their bits to be done too.
Paul has never been a hands on dad it took a year before he changed his first nappie. Hasnt changed that many since either. I think this is why Joe is more clingy with me. Dont get me wrong Paul will help out with washing up and cooking and cleaning but he never really had much of a family life and although he loves the bones of Joe he has never been hands on.
Well now Joe is older he wants to play with Daddy when he comes in and sometimes i hear Paul say daddy just wants to watch this or do that. So i have had to say to him you have wanted Joe to want you for a while now. Now he does want you you want to do other things first. So he is getting better.
I feel for you Angie cos working and running a home as well as bringing up a baby must be bloody hard work.
CJ you two bringing up two young babies is also hard work, i know neither of you would give your children up but sometimes you wish the men would just think a bit more.
Oh god i have waffled here sorry.
CJ - I can only begin to imagine what it would be like putting up with all my [email protected] and having twins. Like Kim said, we wouldn't change it for the world but it gets so hard. Last night we had a dispute about having a wee for gods sake. It goes like this. Jay comes in from work, I made him a brew and while I'm doing this I'm thinking I must go for a wee. I put his brew in the front and he got up and said he was bursting for a wee. I said I was too so for him to hurry up to which I got, why do you always decide you want to go when I do....you've had all day to go. . Like he hadn't had all day and I tried to explain to him, I get so used to putting it off to see a patient or seeing to Jessica that I forget I haven't been for 6 hours or whatever until he mentions it.
Allie - great to hear the news. Will keep everything crossed for you for the next few weeks.
On the same subject has anyone heard from Lucy or Kathryn recently? If you're reading hope all is well with you both.
Angie and CJ - big hugs to you both. I must admit I often wonder how I would cope if I was working as well - I don't seem to have enough hours in the day as it is. Must admit that the best investment we've made in the past year is a dishwasher!!
Jules - have a lovely trip to Canada
Can't really remember what was on the other thread - Carol, hope Luke is improving now and hi to everyone else.
Things seem really hectic at the moment so I don't get that much chance to post. Hannah is a bit out of sorts at the moment - I think it's her very back molars. They've been troubling her on and off for what seems like weeks now - she had a bit of a disturbed night last night and was quite clingy for our Toddlers Christmas Party this morning. Father Christmas coming and bringing them presents seemed to cheer her up a bit though!! Got another party on Sunday and another next Wednesday so it's all go. Then she's an angel in the nativity play at church on Christmas Eve so I've got to make an outfit for her next week.
Ange...I'm sorry hun, wish I could wave a wand to make it better for you. Having your family in Oz must be really hard for you. I hope that once christmas is over you and Jay can get back to normal and be happier again....lots of big huggles to you and kisses for Jessica
Thanks girls, for your lovely replies, I would show them to hubby and see if that makes him buck his ideas up, but it's just not worth the hassle he'd give me, he hates to think of me sharing our private life with strangers.
Ange, god we could be married to the same man
Hubby is just the same , in the mornings I wouldn't dare go into the bathroom as I'd get shouted at ,if I attempt it he shouts "It's my time now!" like we have allocated time slots for the bathroom or something
I must say that he has changed the odd nappy Kim so he's probably not as bad as he could be but I'm sure he's not far behind. He's really wrorried about the boys not being interested in him when their older but if he doesn't put in the time and effort then they won't be. He can't have it both ways.
Well I'm off out tonight, I had grief for it but have stuck to my guns as it's the only time out with friends I'm going to have for a while. I have to feed them both first and be back in time to do the night one which is normally at 9.30pm but I can move it to 10.30pm , oh thanks very much DH! So I get a bit longer out.
I also have to get them ready for bed, and let's hope they don't start crying during little Britain or I'll probably get a phone call
I always get that line "you've had all day to do this or that"
He thinks now I'm at home I can pop here there and every bloody where, but it's impossible to 'just pop' anywhere with twins , every trips like a mission.
I definitely wouldn't change the boys , but if things don't improve I could consider exchanging hubby for a new modern version.....definitely tempting
Carol, thats good news about Luke not being sick anymore, he should start putting his weight back on now eh? You sound like you are proper poorly from your post...hope you feel a bit better today you two, and continue to get well Luke
We just wrapped up Millies crimbo presents, got a £5 santa sack from ELC which is fab...you can fit loads in..can't wait to see her crawling into it and dragging the presents out. Gonna put a little stocking into her cot for when she wakes up with a few small things from ELC too that she can play with when she get up...musical shakers and some small animals & people....ohh and chocolate money (in its net bag...don't want her to choke! ) !
Sooooooooo excited !
Hope you all have great weekends everyone
Loads of love
Hope everyone is OK today and hubbies are behaving themselves properly ! Personally I m in a nark because DH was out till midnight last night and Alex screamed from 4 until 11 off and on, poor love gets really bad wind and nothing seems to shift it (any ideas gratefully recieved) we are on the infacol (orangey burps now) and we have tried all the winding positions and anti colic bottles but she still gets it. So I am off shopping today without Alex and leaving her at home with DH. On the DH front I am all for the you think you can do it all, here is child, food in kitchen, ironing basket is there.... see you later back when I am back, it will soon make them think. On the ironing front as I never do the 'ironing' and only iron when I am about to wear something DH is used to having to do his own and on the cleaning front if it isn't to thier standard then they need to do it.
glad to hear Luke is on the mend but sorry to hear you and john are still poorly Carol.
Ange - sorry Jay is being a wotsit at the mo, I hope things are a little easier today?
CJ - you're welcome over here! Hows things for you today with your dh? How was your night out last night. Have you tried expressing so that you don't have to be back for a certain time? I know that would be another bridge to cross and I'm also presuming your b/f? ? So might be totally barking up the wrong tree?!!! Love the fact you'd swop dh and not the twins! to you.
Carol - really pleased Luke is on the mend and managing to eat! Get well soon to you and John
Amanda - excitement oozes from your post! Love what your up to for Millie!
Clare - I'm with you, Clark's always done his own ironing and I don't iron my stuff! Must say Clark's been pretty good but he doesn't think about doing washing (like how many loads a day!!!) But I do leave Clark to it!
Jac - did you survive? Are you hitting the wine now? Must say thank god for Cbeebies!
Celia - glad Hannah enjoyed christmas pressies from Father Christmas! Hope the outfit making goes OK!
Clark went out Thursday night with some ex-work colleauges - he went to work Friday morning leaving me with one of his mates who had stopped over and I'm trying to bath Chloe etc and get out of the house by a certain time, nightmare! Dropped Chloe at my mum and dad's for them to spend time with her whilst I did Tesco's and an exercise class! I ended up dropping her round in her sleepsuit and with bath instructions!
Well Christmas tree is up and the last few christmas cards to write (delivered a load of local ones yesterday!) and then we get down to the nitty gritty of pressie wrapping! Went to see Santa Claus this morning, Chloe wasn't interested (only interested in the lights!!) but she was good queuing!
Off to a christingle service at the church Chloe was christened in tomorrow and some lights need to go up outside!!
I cannot believe how excited we are for the christmas!
Sue MJ- I did text you today to say that Matalan had sold out of the outfits sorry!
Jac - I too am celebrating our fantastic win!!! Needless to say Phil is not a happy bunny so I am taking advantage and winding him up!!
Also can I just let you know that my best friend / josephs godmother gave birth today by c-section! She had ICSI and it worked 1st time and she has a gorgeous little boy called Thomas who I am looking forward to going to visit tomorrow! Didn't know who else to tell and I had to tell someone, so who better than you lot! I am so excited.
Also I had a look at what we had got Joseph for Christmas and we have loads - i didn't realise how much we had got!
Sorry to have been awol again...Christmas seems to be taking up rather a lot of time but I am glad to say I have finished my shopping today!!! Yay!
Had the in laws down to stay for a couple of days & that all went well, so that's another thing ticked off my list, lol.
LOL at your posts Jac!
Carol glad Luke is on the mend, sorry you're still feeling bad, get well soon love! John is a treasure though, isn;t he?
CJ, Ange, Clare_S, you have my sympathies!!!! Had some storming rows with DH about household stuff over the last few months. In the very early days when I was BF Toby every 2 hours, I asked DH whether he could kindly make my sarnies when he made his for work, so that I would have something ready for lunch, and not have to worry about it, cos sometimes otehrwise I never seemed to eat anything but biscuits all day. Well, you'd think I'd asked him to climb everest the reaction I got!!!
So, when recently he asked me if I could make his sarnies now I was a full time stay at home Mum, I refused, just on the basis that he didn;t want to help me out when I was in dire need of it, so I wasn;t going to do his now, either . I don't think it really sank in but what I do think is that after 10 years of both working full time there is a certain adjustment period that needs to be got through before things settle down into me at home & him at work!! Ange, lol, the wee arguement sounds so like one of ours!
Tomorrow we're off to our NCT Christmas party, one of the Dads is dressing up as Santa, wonder what they'll all make of it!!!
CJ and Ange ~ really hope things improve fir you both....can't be easy at all. Sometimes i need to do something and DH says 'well do it then'. Like when!!! I have a million things to do and feel like i'm going backwards and sometimes i think that life just hasn't changed for him at all. CJ.....hope you had a fab time last night anyway, rant away on here if you need to hun. Ange.....really hope things get better, it's not the same with the in-laws is it.....big hugs,
Jac ~ bet you're enjoying the champagne......busy day. Gonna have a look at the pics in a mo,
SueL ~ have a lovely time tomorrow.....you're going to have a fab first Christmas
My DH is getting worryingly into Strictly Come Dancing
Happy Hanukah everyone.....Kitty had her first one today. Just like Christmas really......big lunch, pressies and MIL trying to make her eat everything
Vicky - my DH is OK honest I was just in a nark about my first day alone being sooo long. I left him to it with bubs today and guess what she behaved really well and has gone down to sleep very well tonight ! methinks my 2.5 week old is a daddys girl