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Hi there, I'm 39, have been TTC for 4 years, have latterly had IVF with BFN x 2 and one cancelled cycle due to not responding to the stims. I was due to start another round of IVF last week but I have a cyst so they have pushed me back for another month. I'm getting to the stage where I am losing the will to do it anymore. I almost want to do this round and for it not to work so I can be sure I tried everything and just move right on. But that seems like crazy logic and I'm so bruised and beaten with it I just want it to stop now. But it seems like a really damp squib just to call it a day now and I wonder if there will be times when I think I'm an idiot for not keeping going.

I'm doing this is a single woman, so I dont have to balance a partner's feelings in all this.

Please, if anyone has any reflection or personal experience will you let me know? I have desperately wanted these babies before and it is a great sadness that I dont have them, but I am also starting to see the benefits of just moving on.

Thank you

 

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Hi AnemoneBee, I am 42 and have been trying for 5 years now, also doing it alone. 6 tries so far, 1 chemical pregnancy. I have moved to donor eggs. I can understand how you feel, having taking a break after the first 3 tries. The feeling that I could have tried more didn't go away and I am now back on the merry go round! It's hard to know when to stop and be sure that you won't regret the decision 10 years down the line. I suppose there is no right or wrong decision here and whichever way you go, be kind to yourself. xx
 

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I know exactly how you feel, it took me 5 years and several miscarriages to have my son. Several times I considered stopping but the thought of never having a child was more painful than everything I was going through, I was due to move on to donor eggs but decided to give my own one last go and my son was born from that. If hadnt worked then I was happy to move on to donor,several friends have and are really positive about it, I dont believe that genetics are all that important and at the end of the day all we want is a take home baby but its a very personal choice. For me it was important that I knew I had tried everything I could so didnt have any regrets.
 
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