Fertility Friends Support Forum banner
1 - 10 of 10 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
48 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Can anyone help - my husband is going on a football tour this weekend but needs to come up with a 'valid' excuse for not having a drink on the weekend. We are due to start our ICSI treatment next month.

We have thought of using the 'I'm on antibiotics' excuse but as he is playing football he can't have an illness as such. He wouldn't be playing football with an ear infection, tooth ache etc.

Has anyone found themselves in a similar situation? What excuses have people used that have passed the interrogation of friends/team mates?
Any suggestions?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
12,048 Posts
You can play football but have AB's the lads won't rationalise it.  Flagyl is one AB that you cannot drink no matter what- usually for stomach/gut issues. He could say he thinks he is coming down with a dodgy stomach after the match and not drink. Could he drive

Or he could say he is on a health kick and have shandies where the guys have pints, or something like lime and soda looks like voda, soda and lime- by the time they are getting drunk and won't notice what their mates are at.

It is a toughie is peer pressure, I know when I went out I used to order a glass of wine etc, and then have a sip and give it to my friend, I used to drive or say not feeling that great but I think it is easier for girls
L x
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
48 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Thanks for the AB advice - what type of illness could he say he has?

It's the 'peer' pressure that is the hardest thing especially as normally he would be in the thick of it. Because he plays a lot of sport and is very fit he doesn't drink very often so if he were to drink this weekend it would be a real 'binge drink'! The group of lads he is going away with are big drinkers and don't take no for answer easily!

Thank you replying. Why are these things never straight forward!

Thank you again x
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,161 Posts
My husband is in the army and that's a huge drinker's culture with loads of peer pressure.

When they go away on exercise together they will often have a night out and all get slaughtered at the end of the exercise. I've known on more than one occasion they'll just grab one of the guys and literally pin him down and force a bottle into his mouth and pour a whole beer down his throat. You can't really get more peer pressure than that!

My husband just doesn't go any more, by his choice. he stays in and watches DVDs on his laptop instead or he goes to the cinema while the guys are out drinking. He really doesn't enjoy it when he's sober and they are getting plastered. It's not much fun being the only sober one.

I was wondering, can he just not go to the drinking bits of it? Again say he is on antibiotics for something and can't drink. Whoever said guys don't rationalise that far is right, they won't ask why. If they ask, just sigh, say "don't ask"  and roll your eyes and that tends to shut people up!

Or... has he thought about telling the guys the truth? It may be easier in the long term? My husband tells everyone, and they are nothing but sympathetic at work (and this is squaddies!). He says - "some guys fire live rounds, some guys fire blanks, me? I forgot to fit the bl**dy magazine!"

When people still hassle him to drink he says fertility treatment costs £5k. Why would he risk £5k for the sake of one pint? They may be guys but money they can understand! lol

The really encouraging thing is other guys have cut back on their drinking too and hang out with my husband now. One guy always gets into trouble when he drinks so he's stopped going out as much. It's like what my husband has done has stopped the peer pressure to drink with who he works with. I'm so proud of him. :)

On that note...

We were out doing the weekly shop the other day. We bought loads of non-alcoholic sparkling grape juice as our wine subsitute. The checkout girl (must have been about 16 with an IQ of 10) asked why we were buying it? We said we had given up drinking. So she asked why again. My husband said because of medical treatment. She kept pushing it and asking why loads until my husband snapped and said "do you really want me to give you all the details? Because I can if you want????!" She backed off a bit and went quite for a while. Then came out again saying "So why aren't you drinking?". Again he said medical treatment. She then says "Tou know what, it sounds like you're trying to have a baby to me."

!!!!

I was torn between bursting into tears and thumping her one!

I shot her a look of pure evil, and my husband said, well, yes.  She kept going on saying good luck and stuff. i couldn't believe her and when we finally got out of there I was visibly shaking.

Why are some people so rubbish?

 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
12,126 Posts
OMG - i'd have told her to mind her bl00dy business!  I can't believe they are even allowed to comment on what people are buying!  How rude is that?!?!

I think the honesty advice is quite good actually - they can't argue with that one, can they?!

However, bear in mind that most courses of antibiotics are 5-7 days (and even 10 days in some cases), he could quite feasibly still be on antibiotics but not actually be ill - just got to finish the course.  but yes, Flagyl (metronidazol) will make you vomit if you drink with it so it's a good one to say you are taking!

 

·
Registered
Joined
·
48 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thank you for the advice and words of encouragement. It means a lot to know that others are in/have been in our situation.

Sorry for not responding sooner but I've had a very long day in work and have spent the rest of the evening helping DH with his packing. Yesterday he was even thinking of not going on tour but reading your responses has given him the reassurance he needed. So thank you very much.  :)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
48 Posts
Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Just spoken to DH who is having a fantastic weekend even though he hasn't had a drink. The rest of the boys have been great about him not drinking. Hope this gives any of you guys who find yourself in a similar situation some encouragement.

I'm really really really REALLY proud of my DH and I'm sure his ^HappySperm^ ^HappySperm^ ^HappySperm^ are happy too!!!!!!!!!  :) :) :) :)
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
12,126 Posts
that's brilliant hun - was he honest with them?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
48 Posts
Discussion Starter · #9 ·
DH was honest with the boys he knows really well - they gave him the support and back up he needed to get through the first night of ‘why aren’t you drinking?’ He used the AB excuse with the rest of them – but after a few hours they were too drunk to take any notice!!!
^drink^ ^drink^ ^drink^ ^drink^ ^drink^ ^drink^ ^drink^

I’m picking DH up from the airport in a few hours so I’ll hear all about it then but like I said I’m really really really REALLY proud of him and for sure his  ^HappySperm^ ^HappySperm^ ^HappySperm^ ^HappySperm^ are very happy too!!!!!!!

Thanks for checking on us ^wave^
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
12,126 Posts
give him a big hug from me ;)
 
1 - 10 of 10 Posts
Top