[hilarypax]

hello!

i am new to this forum! I am 41, have a daughter conceived with my OE IVF and known donor sperm. We live in the U.S.

i am now looking into two options to try for #2... either use donated embryo (probably double donor through europe program or if i can find affordable option in the US), or going abroad to do DE IVF with the same known donor's sperm (he would be my "partner").

i have family in edinburgh for a year and have been half-heartedly joking that i'll come visit if they can find me a scottish embryo... my PGF was scottish and so i have been thinking that would be nice (my mom has always wanted a red head!).

i am in contact with GCRM... haven't gotten many answers yet, but they should be creating an account for me today.

i have so many questions, so many things i'm trying to figure out!!

i guess i could ask on this thread:

- with the donor egg option, i'm seeing that you can get all the fresh eggs or split between 2 recipients. or, you can get frozen eggs, which i figured i'd want the largest package. do folks have thoughts about which of these 3 options is best? if the first try doesn't work, it'd be tricky and expensive to fly back again... i'd really want my best shot with the first try.

- do there tend to be lots of "extra" costs, preliminary testing, etc?

- how thoroughly are donors screened? do the accept donors with mental health histories in themselves or in their families? this is a major concern of mine; i am probably going to turn down a group of PGS tested embryos that have been offered me through a known donating couple due to higher than normal risk of autism, as well as family history of ADHD and alcoholism. (it's really the autism that i'm the most concerned about- sperm donor was 52 at the time of conception, and they think one child from the same batch prob has autism and are having him tested next month).

- what information does the recipient get about the donor prior to accepting? in the CR and elsewhere in europe, it's little to nothing. i know in UK the donor can be contacted by age 18, and i really like this. do you get a picture? do you read their profiles?

- are there other clinics in scotland i should be considering? are most of the donors scottish?

- will they work with single women?

also, if anyone has any thoughts about getting a Double donor embryo, which in many ways seems simpler, but would be fully anonymous for life (if done in mainland Europe), vs going the route of open ID egg donor and known sperm donor but much more complicated, probably expensive, and not sure how the chances for success compare.... i'd love to hear them!!

thanks!!!

hilary

 

[Turia]

Hi Hilarypax
Didn't want to read and run and I know how hard it can be to make your first posts and then not get a reply. Unfortunately I don't have the full answers to your questions, you definitely have to ask these to your clinic. What I can say is that I know GCRM well and they are a good clinic with a great team, so you will be in good hands. In terms of your questions, here's my best shot at answers!

- with the donor egg option, i'm seeing that you can get all the fresh eggs or split between 2 recipients. or, you can get frozen eggs, which i figured i'd want the largest package. do folks have thoughts about which of these 3 options is best? if the first try doesn't work, it'd be tricky and expensive to fly back again... i'd really want my best shot with the first try.
Unsure - some people respond better to fresh, some to frozen. I would however want 'all' the eggs to give my self the best shots.

- do there tend to be lots of "extra" costs, preliminary testing, etc?
GCRM will provide a full price list but yes there are always costs for certain tests. It really depends on what you need and what is included in their package.

- how thoroughly are donors screened? do they accept donors with mental health histories in themselves or in their families?
https://www.hfea.gov.uk/code-of-practice/11 might be worth a read. Mental health is included in the screening.

- what information does the recipient get about the donor prior to accepting? in the CR and elsewhere in europe, it's little to nothing. i know in UK the donor can be contacted by age 18, and i really like this. do you get a picture? do you read their profiles?
Check with the clinic, my impression was that most information is provided once the child is 16 but I didn't use a donor in the UK. I went to Spain and was told age, height, hair colouring, eye colour, blood group and was assured that if I had asked for university level educated then I would have been matched as such.

- are there other clinics in scotland i should be considering? are most of the donors scottish?
There are other private clinics you could go to or contact if you want to shop around. I'm certainly aware of:
Nuffield Health in Glasgow
Edinburgh Assisted Conception Unit
Assisted Conception Unit, Glasgow Royal Hospital (half the cost of normal private clinics as you are treated alongside non-private and the money goes back into research)
There is also a clinic in Aberdeen (Aberdeen Fertility Centre) and Dundee (Ninewells)

GCRM does have a satellite clinic in Edinburgh so a lot of appointments could be done there.

- will they work with single women?
As far as I know, yes

thoughts about getting a Double donor embryo, (if done in mainland Europe), vs going the route of open ID egg donor and known sperm donor
I would perhaps post this question separately in the donor conception section as you may get a better response. http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?board=64.0 Certainly if money is an issue (and it usually is for most of us) then I would go for the option that would give better success rates and I could give multiple shots at. It took me 6 goes of donor eggs to get my baby and although that is the unusual end, people need to realise that it can take a couple of goes even with donor.

Good luck with it all and congratulations on your earlier IVF success

Turia x

 

[hilarypax]

turia, thanks so much for your response!
i checked incessantly for days and days with no response, so i really appreciate that you went out of your way to make sure i heard something!

that said, i did a lot of research in the meantime and eventually got my hands on GCRM's brochures and had a skype conversation to get additional questions answered. i still had one or two remaining but eventually chose not to use them-- i decided that it would be more logical (as money is an issue, as you suggested) to go for double donor embryo here in the U.S. it was really interesting to finally be able to SEE what was so complicated for me when i lined up little notes with boxes and check marks comparing my different options and which of my primary values would likely be achieved with each. i realized i was compromising too much by considering the scotland route, and prioritizing things that really weren't on the top of my list. i really had to see it to finally get it!

so, i'm on track over here in the U.S. but i still feel like you never know, and i may change course at some point if needed...

thanks so much!!!

oh by the way, GCRM was VERY IMPRESSIVE in all respects. also, i was especially impressed by the related governing body of the U.K. (hfea)-- their website was so chock full of great info and convinced me that i could trust all the donors would be healthy (including family health history). i wanted to come to scotland just to use an hfea-approved donor! i looked into it and the US is seriously lacking this!

peace,
hilary