Hi, I am 40, married for 8 years and living in Wales. We have been trying for a baby since we got married (like good Catholics ) Fell pregnant after three years and it ended in an early M/C which unfortunately knocked me for six and set me on a downward spiral including almost two years on anti-depressants whilst still trying. We were on the NHS waitlist for two years then after that for IVF only to find out at the end of the wait that I had low ovarian reserve and we were no longer eligible. Hubby also has slow swimmers. We went private straight away and did a round of IVF just to see if there was any hope. I ended up with three follicles, one egg. It didn’t fertilise. We have had to go straight to donor eggs which seemed so crazy and out there to begin with but the desire for my own biological baby is so strong I have gotten comfortable with it. We are with LWC and LEB. This means the process is as simplified as it can be, no travel involved and with the pandemic the clinic is so quiet it feels very private which I like and I’m working from home so no nosy colleagues asking why I need the morning off, etc. The first transfer should take place in approximately six weeks and with 10 eggs I am hoping for at least three transfers. It’s daunting, especially with the financial outlay, no guarantee of success and the fact this baby would not come from me or look like me. Weirdly, I am relieved in one sense as the IVF drugs sent me loopy and the injections were horrific and I cried every time due to being overly hormonal and wanted to give up every time . This time will be pessaries and tablets and hopefully no injections Even if I get that illusive BFP i have no confidence that it will stick and I just think I will not be able to relax and enjoy a pregnancy at all now. So that’s where I am at. Trying to relax and eat well and get on with things in the meantime.