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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
These are great!!


One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweatshirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, "What
setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of North Carolina."

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A couple is lying in bed.
The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world"
The woman says, "I'll miss you..."
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"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower,
"Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?"

"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
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He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, I have wanted to make love to you really badly.

She said - Well, you succeeded.
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He said - What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you?

She said - Turn sideways and look in the mirror.
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Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A: A rumor
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A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding
anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that
because they had been such a devoted couple she would grant each of them
a very special wish.

The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.
Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands. The man
wished for a female companion 30 years younger...
Whoosh ... immediately he turned ninety!!!
Gotta love that fairy!
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AND THE BEST ONE ...

A WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST:
* She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee.
* Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box.
* Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week.
* Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl.
* And her husband is on the back of the milk carton
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A PRAYER ...
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And Patience for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
 

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2,622 Posts
;D ;D ;D
claire,
xxx.
 
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