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I'm wondering if I can pick the brains/experiences of some of you on this thread.

DH and I are quite early into our ttc journey atm and aren't finished with IVF just yet. Since our bfn though we have been talking a lot about how long do we try and other options available to us. This has thrown up a couple of questions that you might be able to help me with:

1. Do you have to wait a certain amount of time after fertility tx before you can start the adoption process?
2. Roughly how long does the adoption process take (i.e. first contact to take home)?
3. My dh had cancer in 1997 but has been in remission now since 1998. Would this prohibit us from adopting?

Thanks for you help everyone. I love reading this thread - it's so inspirational.


 

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Hi there Shannon

Welcome to our thread! Firstly you'll see from reading some of our previous topics, time lengths vary quite a lot from one end of the country to the other, but I'll tell you my story...
We were told that we had to wait 6 months after finishing our last IVF before we could proceed with adoption - we did though contact SS well before our second attempt, we had a visit and a long chat, really just to get an idea of how things work. After our last attempt, we did get another visit from SS just really to re-affirm our interest. Yes that time you wait seems forever, but believe me, you'll realise why they make you wait. I found I really needed that time to reflect and grieve, and really put IVF behind me. And the time flew by anyway!
At the start we were told that the process would take between 9 and 12 months - that is from first applying, to being approved. We started in March and are waiting for a panel date - hopefully Feb or March - so ours has taken the 12 months. But to be honest, again it's flown -because you're busy all the time and really having something to aim for this time.
Obviously this doesn't include the child coming home. From being approved at panel, the time we could be waiting for a match is.... well, how long is a piece of string?! Nobody knows. Could be weeks or months.
Finally, I cannot see your dh's health history being a major stumbling block. You will both have medicals to confirm you are well, so there shouldn't be any problems.

I must remind you though, that time scales really do vary a lot, so don't take my details as red. Other ladies on this thread have had a lot quicker process, and others a lot longer. All depends on your authority and on your circumstances.
You'd be best speaking to a SW for an initial chat. May be worth showing your interest early on.

But with any luck, you won't be needing our services! Best of luck with your future treatment...

E x
 

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Hi Shannon

I think Ever has summed it up really well in her post.  All Local Authorities vary in how long they want you to wait, in the main I've found most LA's are about 6 months. 

In terms of timescales again, thesevary.  I am very lucky to have been placed with 2 lovely little girls and from when we started to the first one coming home it took 18 months to get matched and then another 3 months before she moved in due to courts etc.  so 21 months all in all.

As ever said it depends on what type of child and age of child you are prepared to take and what children there are in your area waiting to be placed.  As Ever says there is alot to think about during the process which keeps you occupied.  Again you will both have medicals so your doctor will have to answer questions about his health.  If its any consolation there was a lady on my prep course who underwent her medical before they started as she too had had cancer and they wanted to get the all clear medically first before embaking on the process and then risk getting rejected further down the line.

Good luck
Karen x
 
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