[Julie Wilts]

Ladies

I would love to hear how you get on with time off work after tx.  I had my 2nd IUI last Thursday and told my boss last week that I would be off work (Mon/Tues) to rest following it.  I've phoned in today (so that I follow company procedure, despite e-mailing to confirm on Thursday) and was told it didn't count as sickness but either holiday or unpaid leave.

On my first IUI I went straight back to work, and really regretted it because if was a very stressful week.

I know tx is "elective" but I still kinda thought it would be ok to take a couple of days sick leave.   Guess it probably depends on Company policy?

Any opinions/advice very welcome.
Thanks,
Julie XXX

 

[beachgirl]

Julie- could you not go to clinic or GP's and ask for a sick note related to gynae issues? x

 

[Julie Wilts]

Mmmm I'm a bit torn as to what to do.  Did consider trying to get to see the Doc (but will probably be back at work by then  ).

 

[☼♥ Minxy ♥☼ ©]

Hi

Perhaps have a little read of these previous threads that I found when I did a quick search of Peer Support board. Please do try to use the search tool as it's really useful for frequently asked questions...

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=136449.0

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=136076.0

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=132385.0

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=132664.0

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=131926.0

http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=129690.0

Take care
Natasha

 

[Julie Wilts]

Sorry Natasha,

Only post I could find was about Teachers, thanks for leaving the other threads.

2ww Seems to be making me more stupid than usual.

Julie

 

[☼♥ Minxy ♥☼ ©]

The search facility is the 4th button along the top of the webpage....all I typed in was "time off work" and searched only on Peer Support....so if you do your own search you should find more

 

[Stars*]

You can self certificate by getting the form from your gp surgery it lasts 7 days.

Lisa xx

 

[Julie Wilts]

Thanks Lisa, think I'm just going to accept that it's 2 days holiday and hope it's going to be the last time I'll need off  .

Hope you enjoy your holiday - we went to San Francisco a few years ago to see friends and it was lovely.

 

[Han72]

DON'T self-certify!  If your employer is one of the stroppy ones that likes to trot out all of your sick days and use them in evidence (not that I'm saying you'd ever end up in an employment tribunal) but basically they cannot use any gp certified sick days against you.  However, it's open season on self-cert days...

This info has come to me via a friend who HAS had problems with her employer due to sickness, so I haven't verified it myself but don't think I misunderstood...  in any case, always best to do your own research in these situations, failing that, you could ask for access to the work issues board....?

All the best hon (from someone who is going for ET tomorrow and who will be signed off until a few days after test day!)

xxx

 

[☼♥ Minxy ♥☼ ©]

I know I've already replied with some useful threads but thought I'd add that my company were initially really good about me taking time off as I was completely honest and upfront.....they allowed me to have time off for 1st IVF and both FETs....although I did get signed off by my consultant from either EC or ET.

However after that they got really funny with me and told me in no uncertain terms that it was "elective" surgery and it would either be holiday or unpaid leave.  My boss even asked "how many times are you going to be doing this ?!" (errrr, basically as long as it takes mate !!! )  I also got told that if I took any sick leave for it I would be slapped with a disaplinary....and when I said about being signed off by consultant, they (HR) told me if they found out it was for IVF then I could also face disaplinary !!

I decided that since this was their attitude then I wouldn't tell them when I would be having treatment....I mean, I don't tell them when we have "baby making sex" so why should I tell them when I'm having "baby making treatment" !

I then had to have an op for my endo etc in the February (last year) and obviously got signed off for 2 weeks (my work are fully aware of my endo as I've had several ops for it, they knew before they employed me and they can't do anything against me because of it !).....but HR called me up when I'd booked the time off on the holiday/time off system to ask me if this was "essential" surgery or was I choosing to have it done ie "elective".....I told them truthfully that it was for my endo so not much they could do about it !

I had another IVF in March/Apr 07 and again in Sept/Oct 07....neither times did I tell my work.  On the last time, I got a BFN and still came into work that day but was due to go to lunch with some colleagues to celebrate completion of project (and also one of the guys last day at work).....got very p!ste and didn't return to work (which was actually expected anyway as none of us did !!)....I phoned in sick the next day cos so upset from BFN (puffy eyes from crying), heavy bleeding & cramping, migraine (always get before AF) and yes, admittedly, a bit of a hangover too if I'm honest so a bit naughty I spose....anyway, boss went a bit mad when I came back into work next day and I just said fine, I'll book it as holiday but just for information, we had our 5th unsuccessful IVF (3rd fresh but 2 FETs - didn't explain about chem pgs with FET as he'd have no clue !) so yes, whilst I admit I didn't come back after a LATE lunch (we didn't go out until 3pm !) and that I wasn't the only one...and I phoned in sick....I did actually have a good reason as was getting terrible cramps and heavy bleeding, migraine and also did not feel like facing people and putting up with [email protected] at work !!  He did actually apologise but I still had to take it as day and half holiday (half day even though from 3pm and then one day for the "sick" day as apparently I wasn't really "sick" )

This time round no-one knows (well couple of colleagues who look out for me) but not HR and not my boss....all time off has been holiday and I came back to work the day after ET.

I've been at this company for over 10 years now and sometimes I feel like they really don't give a monkies about their staff....and they seriously need to look more closely at their IVF policies.

Anyway, rant over   but just wanted to let you know you're not alone !!!

Good luck & take care
Natasha xx

 

[Julie Wilts]

Nixf01/Feehilyfan/Natasha

Ladies, thank you so much for all your advice and info.  Natasha - I was so  to hear what your company have put you through.  Especially when you've been there so long.

It's a tough one for me because my boss knows all about what's going on.  Thought it best to be upfront when we first had our dx, but now regret it a bit. He's been very amenable so far, but to be fair I've only had a couple of hours off for scans and nothing off for tx.

I've worked at my company for over 7 years, and they are quite strict about sickness because as a big company it costs them a lot of money, which I do appreciate.  However, my gripe is just that I know people have sickness for the most basic things - colds etc., and try to use up their sickness as if it's an allowance.  I checked last week and in 2 years I've 9 days, 4 of which were GP certificated, and were down to stress from our dx which resulted in lots of different things.  I'm not happy about having 9 days out, but think it could have been so much worse.  My boss says I can have a day's sick on the day of tx (except I only work Mon/Tues and both times it's been on a Thursday), but have to use holiday or unpaid leave for any other time off.

I think I'm just going to have to use holiday for these 2 days (annoying as I only get 13 days per year and don't get any Bank Holidays or Christmas/Boxing Day/New Year's Day off).  Hoping that I will be on maternity leave this year anyway and they'll have to get stuffed then.  .

It's a nightmare isn't it - as if we all need the added stress on top of everything else.  It also makes me really  because I know all the Line Managers are off for another few days "jolly" soon which they call Team Building.  Seems they can afford lots of perks for some people, but not a couple of days sick for the lower mortals. 

Thanks again for your lovely replies.
XXXX

 

[Han72]

Bloody hell Tash!  Your employers sound like real [email protected]!  Ok fair enough they need to protect themselves up to a point, but not at the risk of endangering the physical and emotional wellbeing of staff!  Just let anyone from HR try and ring me to find out why I'm off.... !

Anyway, if IVF is the only way you can get preg then for me, it's not elective.  Ok the wish to have children is our choice, but the method isn't is it? Bloody hell who would choose to go through this if they didn't have to?! So I wouldn't call it elective at all!  

...And anyone who wants to disagree can KMA!

Julie, I wish you all the best hon and that you will be able to go on mat leave and tell 'em where to stick it!

(Can you tell the hormones are really kicking in now, I'm getting well aggressive today! )
xxx

 

[Julie Wilts]

Thanks Nix, Just hope I haven't opened a can of worms, and got everyone all wound up and stressed.

Deep breaths everyone, count to 10.  we all get BFP's this month so there's a nationwide "epidemic" of ladies on maternity leave. 

Thank God we have FF to turn to and have a rant with eh. 

 

[Han72]

International epidemic please, I live in France!

 

[Julie Wilts]

Sorry hun, yep, that should read "World Epidemic". 

 

[JaneNewcastle]

This has to be one of the most hotly debated topics on the boards. There are obviously two sides to the argument, one is that you should be allowed sick time, the other is that you should take it as holiday or unpaid leave.

My personal thought is that time off for EC or ET should be holiday, for most of us there is no need for sick time for the 2ww, most ladies on a 2ww don't do anything different to normal. Some people talk about not telling an employer if they were able to get pregnant naturally about when they were having BMS. I guess not many people who have BMS take the next two weeks on the sick.

Then at the end of the 2ww you could have a wonderful BFP, but you might get the dreaded BFN. The latter might bring with it an unpleasant AF to cope with, which you might need time off on the sick for.

So how does this affect employers?

You do not by law have to tell your boss why you are off, but you do have to let your HR department know. After all you are asking them to pay you for staying at home, so they are entitled to know what's wrong with you.

To say that they cannot bring into play sick time covered by a medical certificate is not quite right. Any employer is entitled to review your sick record at any time and ask you to improve it. Most places have a policy on it. At my place of work it would kick in after five instances of sick time over a rolling six months, medical certificate or self certified.

Every employer has a varying degree of holiday/sick/unpaid leave flexibility, but Julie - yours seems to be one of the toughest I have heard of in a long time ...

I think I'm just going to have to use holiday for these 2 days (annoying as I only get 13 days per year and don't get any Bank Holidays or Christmas/Boxing Day/New Year's Day off).

I think I'd be looking for a new job!!! Most places give 4 weeks, and that is plus 8 Public Holidays.

Good Luck with your 2ww.

Jane
x

 

[Julie Wilts]

JaneNewcastle - Ah, but I only work 2 days a week so that's why I only have 13 days holiday as it's worked pro rata (but like I say I have to take holiday if I don't want to work any Bank Holiday Mondays/Christmas Day/Boxing Day/New Years Day).

Like you say, the subject clearly raises some strong opinions.
X

 

[Mrs Chaos]

Hi Julie
Have you requested access to our Work Issues board hun?
I was under the impression that you do not have to work BH as they are Statutory holidays
My friend works at Asda which has recently been taken over by Walmart and that store renamed Walmart and they do not get double time pay for BH as they are a US owned company, who do not acknowledge our BH She was told she also had to work Sundays, which I can't believe
Work Issues board here if you need it my lovely
http://www.fertilityfriends.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=133056.0

Lotsa love
Gayn
XX

 

[Julie Wilts]

Thanks Gayn. . Thanks for the link to the work issues board, but I'm going to keep  &  that the next time I'll need off is for maternity. 

Unfortunately, as I work for a holiday company, we have to be around for our guests every day of the year and we signed contracts agreeing to this.  My 13 days is apparently worked pro-rata allowing for extra days in lieu of Bank Holidays, but it never feels like it.

It wouldn't be such a worry but my DD starts school in September, and as she will only go for a couple of hours a day for the first term, I'm probably going to have to use lots of holiday then.  As I won't be starting any maternity leave till nearer Christmas, I'm going to have to think about how I'm going to juggle everything about.

To Walmart for forcing their American values onto British employees though. 

 

[☼♥ Minxy ♥☼ ©]

My personal thought is that time off for EC or ET should be holiday, for most of us there is no need for sick time for the 2ww, most ladies on a 2ww don't do anything different to normal. Some people talk about not telling an employer if they were able to get pregnant naturally about when they were having BMS. I guess not many people who have BMS take the next two weeks on the sick.

Then at the end of the 2ww you could have a wonderful BFP, but you might get the dreaded BFN. The latter might bring with it an unpleasant AF to cope with, which you might need time off on the sick for.

HI

I presume you're referring to my previous post with your comments. I think trying naturally and trying with treatment is completely different........having treatment you actually have a surgical procedure....so you're recovering from that, as well as coping with the 2ww.

Yes, I have been signed off after 1 EC for full 2 weeks (my first IVF) and then for 1st FET.....however, I've only ever been signed off for a couple of days following EC/ET for 2nd FET.....ALL other treatments were either holiday....or infact I've always returned straight to work following ET, as I did this time round. The only other time I've been signed off in relation to our IVF was after our 2nd FET (I'd been at work from ET so not taken time off for 2ww)....but it was our 2nd chemical pregnancy and our 3rd IVF/FET treatment within a year......and I was signed off with stress because I found it very hard to deal with another chem pg/early mc.

So no, I don't have to tell my employers why I'm off if I'm taking holiday.........I understand your comments about employers should be made aware if taking time as "sick".....but what I was personally referring to was that I didn't feel that if I was having treatment and taking it as holiday THATs why I shouldn't have to tell them because I wouldn't if I was having BMS (slightly different to how you've worded it )

Can I just ask......and please please don't take offence....but have you actually been through IVF....all the drugs/hormones, have you had EC followed by the worrying wait until ET...and then the anxious 2ww knowing you've got embies on board that may or may not hang around for the duration ? If you have then I think you understand that it is incredibly stressful process....if not, then please take a little time to try to appreciate what it's like....for any of us, first timers and also for multiple cyclers like myself who is currently on their 6th treatment cycle for baby number 1 (after 4 early miscarriages/chem pgs and only ever took time off after the 2 mentioned above...the other natural mc's I carried on at work as normal.)

I appreciate your comments but I also feel that companies should provide better IVF policies...there are more and more ladies requiring medical intervention and considering I've been with the company a long time and worked my @ss off for them I don't feel I'm getting much back when I most need it. Oh and I work for a blue chip/large international (and well known) media and financial data company so not exactly small fry !

Take care
Natasha