[struthie]

I'm hoping someone can give me some advice.
When dh had his two SA done it came back that he had a average count but the sperm don't swim.
They have said that ICSI is our only option.
Well dh had said before the results that the problem would be with him,and if it was then he was more than happy to use donor sperm,something I was against to begin with but I am becoming more used to the idea.

Anyway my point is this,when we go back for our next appointment on the 30th March will they say ICSI or nothing,can we ask to do DIUI.
I feel it will be less invasive than ICSI,although I don't really know!
What happens with donor sperm,would we have to have counselling before they say yes we can?
Sorry so many questions!

 

[alex28]

I think you can ask to do DIUI but the consultant will want to know why when you have the chance to do ICSI.  Personally i would go for ICSI but we did not have the choice as theres no sperm at all with DH, however do understand that it is each and everyones own decision and whether it be financial or whatever you have to make the decision you are most happy with.

I would be inclined to maybe try one attempt at ICSI and then re-evaulate things if thats not successfull. 

Wishing you heaps of luck with whatever you decide and we will be here to support you regardless.

 

[Jayne]

Hi Struthie

We decided to go straight to DIUI instead of ICSI also.  Dh has azoospermia, but we couldn't afford to do ICSI (not even sure it would've been possible either as dh had no investigations past the sperm test) and this was the only reason we had to provide to the clinic for choosing donor.  We didn't want to wait the waiting list for NHS treatment whether it be ICSI or DIUI as we had already been ttc for so long anyway.  We were both happy to use donor from the outset. 

I think it depends on what sort of person you are.  Some people want to exhaust every possible option of having a child that is biologically theirs and their dh's, but others don't mind so much.  It's personal choice.  Of course I'm sad that I wasn't able to ttc a child who was bilogically my dh's, but it's not an overwhelming sadness, and not something I think of nowadays either.  Honestly, looking at Jack and Ben now, it really doesn't make the blindest bit of difference!    I wouldn't have had them if we had done ICSI    So, hand on heart, I can say no regrets at all. 

In saying all of the above, IF dh and I had been able to afford ICSI privately at the time, then I suspect we may have attempted that first before going down the donor route, but I can't say with certainty as we didn't consider it at the time, and I'm just saying what I think we might have done at the time, but all these years later (if you know what I mean?). 

It's a very personal choice you have to make, and unfortunately only you and your dh can make it (although it sounds as though dh has already made his choice).  Whatever you choose, I'm sure it will be right for you and I hope it brings you your dream 

Love

Jayne x

 

[alex28]

Just thought i would say Jayne that every time i see you post i think your boys look sooo cute!!!!

 

[Jayne]

Awww, thanks Alex    That's so kind of you to say 

Love

Jayne x

 

[struthie]

Thanks both of you.
I keep going between doing ICSI,and then yes definetely DIUI.
Its so difficult,dh says he doesn't mind either way its up to me!
If money was no problem then we would do ICSI first and if that didn't work then move onto the DIUI.
So so difficult,but its so glad that you did the same thing Jayne,that makes me feel that I am not quite as mad as I thought!
And I must agree I love the photo of your boys,they are just beautiful.

 

[Jayne]

Nooooo, you're not mad Struthie - well, unless I am too    It's a difficult decision you're facing. 

Thanks for your lovely comment about Jack and Ben 

Love

Jayne x

 

[alex28]

out of interest Jayne, when did you reserve your donor for more sperm??  Was it when you got pg or after you gave birth and what sort of cost are you looking at?

Hope you dont mind me asking!

 

[Jayne]

Hi Alex

When I had the DIUI for Jack the clinic mentioned to us that we could buy some vials and store for future use to ttc a sibling, and we did look into the cost at the time, but to be honest I can't remember how much it was as it's a little over 5 years ago now, but it wasn't something we could afford to do at the time and we really just kept our fingers crossed that the same donor would be around for when we did want to ttc again.  We were very fortunate that he was.  He had reached his max 10 pregnancies, and was only available for sibling donation at the time we ttc Ben.  I think we were incredibly fortunate as we ttc during a time there wasn't such a shortage of donors as there is now.  If we were ttc now, then I think I'd reserve some vials from the donor once I had a BFP, but then again I wonder whether I would do it once I found a match just in case the shortage got even worse.    Ohhhh, I don't know    The dilemma you all face now is so different, and it's not something I had to think about.  I really feel for you all.  As if having to go down the donor route isn't hard enough, without this added pressure   

And no, I don't mind you asking 

Love

Jayne x

 

[alex28]

Thanks Jayne!